OBAMA NEEDS TO ENLIST “ALL FEMALE BODYGUARDS”

THEY DON’T GET HARD-ONS

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PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB!

“UNDERCOVER”

HOUSEKEEPER: NEED NEW BED SHEETS

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HUNGRY FOR SEX IN A FOREIGN CUNTRY

HOOKERS IN COLUMBIA?  HAVE YOU SEEN SEXY SOFIA VERGARA!

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SECRET SERVICE AGENTS ASSIGNED TO PROTECT THE PRESIDENT HAD ONLY ONE THING ON THEIR MINDS “AN ERECTION”

WHAT’S HAPPENING TO OUR NATION’S SECURITY WHEN 12 SECRET SERVICE AGENTS AND 12 U.S. MILITARY MEN ONLY THINK ABOUT SCREWING 20 WOMEN THAN WORKING?

NINE AGENTS HAVE BEEN FORCED OUT FOR INTERCOURSE WITH WHORES WHO SAY THEY LOVE “HOT DOGS”

MORE AGENTS AND GOVERNMENT SUBCONTRACTORS WENT TO STRIP CLUBS IN EL SALVADOR JUST BEFORE OBAMA GOT THERE.  THEY TOOK WHORES BACK TO THEIR HOTEL ROOM WHERE THEY SCORED!

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PROSTITUTES WANT TO GET PAID FOR A GOOD LAY

BY THE WAY SHE’S AN “ESCORT” NOT A HOOKER WHO SAYS SECRET AGENTS ARE IDIOTS – OBAMA CALLS THEM PRICKS!

COLUMBIAN GOOD-LOOKER HOOKER SAYS HER REPUTATION IS RUINED BY SECRET SERVICE MANHANDLING SCANDAL

HOE SAYS SHE NEVER GOT ENOUGH DOUGH FOR TAKING OFF HER CLOTHES

NOW SHE CAN’T WALK THE STREETS IN BRA & PANTIES WITHOUT BEING NOTICED BY POLICE

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AGENTS JOBS ARE ON THE LINE FOR A GRIND

COULD  HAVE “JERKED OFF” INSTEAD OF GETTING CAUGHT!

NOW IT’S TOO LATE YOU HAVE TO FACE “OBAMA THE BOSS”

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MITT SAYS GIVE THEM “PINK SLIPS” FOR PUTTING THEIR PLAY TIME AND PERSONAL INTERESTS AHEAD OF THE NATION’S PROTECTION.  HOLD OBAMA RESPONSIBLE FOR “LOUSY LEADERSHIP”

ONE AGENCY SUPERVISOR ALLOWED TO RETIRE, ONE WAS “REMOVED FOR CAUSE” AND ANOTHER NON-SUPERVISORY EMPLOYEE FIRED WHILE OTHER AGENTS WERE PUT ON ADMINISTRATIVE LEAVE

TWO SECRET SERVICE SUPERVISORS NAMELY DAVID RANDALL CHANEY (WHOSE “JANUARY 2009″ FACEBOOK PAGE SHOWS HIM GUARDING SARAH PALIN SAYS HE WAS REALLY  “CHECKING HER OUT” WHILE PALIN SAYS “WELL MAN YOU’RE FIRED”) AGENT RETIRED UNDER PRESSURE AND GREG STOKES AN ASSISTANT SPECIAL (CANINE UNIT) AGENT WAS FIRED.  BOTH MEN WORKED AT THE AGENCY FOR NEARLY TWO DECADES

SECRET SERVICE DIRECTOR INVESTIGATING VIOLATING “CURFEWS FOR A SCREW”

ONE CUTE PROSTITUTE SUED U.S. EMBASSY FOR INJURIES

SECRET SERVICE ISSUES NEW RULES FOR AGENTS LOOKING TO GET SCREWED – NO MORE TAKING FOREIGNERS UP TO YOUR HOTEL ROOM, BUT IS IT OKAY IF THEY LAY THE MAID?

OBAMA TELLS SECRET SERVICE AGENTS AT WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENTS’ DINNER “THEY’LL BE NO MORE SCREWS AFTER  CURFEW.”

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NOW I ASK YOU WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN OBAMA “SCREWING UP” THE ECONOMY?

AND

HOUSE MINORITY LEADER NANCY PELOSI SAYING IT’S DISGUSTING AFTER HER DISGRACEFUL OUTRAGEOUS “INSIDER TRADING.”  PELOSI AND OTHER CONGRESSIONAL CRONIES SHOULD HAVE BE PUT IN THE POKEY LIKE “CHEATS ON WALL STREET”

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Created by Francke the Lyrical Yankee

May 2012

All Rights Reserved

for the ultimate

screw-up and sexually disturbed

Did Trayvon Benjamin Martin look “suspicious” to George Michael Zimmerman because he was wearing a “hooded” sweatshirt or attacked and killed for just being black?  Trayvon was casually walking holding a can of Arizona iced tea and a bag of Skittles with very little money in his pocket when it began to rain so he pulled up the hoodie.

On Sunday, February 26, 2012 an unarmed 17-year-old, 6-foot-3 150-pound African American male named Trayvon Martin from Miami Lakes, Florida in his junior year at Miami South High School was casually walking that evening through Twin Lakes gated community where he was visiting his father, Tracy Martin, financee’ and her son at a townhouse after coming from a nearby 7-Eleven convenience store where he bought a can of Arizona iced tea and a bag of Skittles was confronted by 28-year-old, five-foot-nine around 200-pounds, multiracial Hispanic and Caucasian origin named George Zimmerman, the neighborhood’s self-appointed “volunteer watchman” not officially “an officer of the law.”  In 2009 Zimmerman’s parents moved to “Retreat of Twin Lakes” Sanford (Central Florida) a city of about 54,000 people where shooting took place.  They are no longer living at this complex, but their son, George Zimmerman and his wife, Shellie are residing at the Twin Lakes community.

An American Tragedy

Since there were multiple break-ins in the vicinity about 7:00 pm neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman calls “911″ to report a “suspicious person” in the “Retreat of Twin Lakes” gated community.  Zimmerman says he is following Martin after teen started to run.  The dispatcher said “We don’t need you to do that” to which Martin responded “OK.”  Zimmerman pursues Martin anyway saying he lost sight of him.

Around 7:10 pm phone records show teenager Trayvon text his girlfriend and while speaking to her all of a sudden from out of nowhere some strange man was following him which turned out to be Zimmerman.  Girlfriend heard Trayvon saying “What are you following me for?” and the man said “What are you doing here?” Girlfriend says she clearly heard “Somebody pushing and someone did push Trayvon and tackle him because his headset (earpiece) just fell so I called Trayvon again, but he didn’t answer.” Nothing about that conversation lends credibility or sense to Zimmerman’s claim of self-defense.  What it sounded like to me (girlfriend) was a scared boy confronted by an “aggressive grown man.”  Trayvon was just 70 feet away from the entrance to his father’s townhome when he ran.  Now George Zimmerman was not about to back down, he was taking a stand.

According to newspaper story which was later confirmed by Sanford police, Zimmerman tells authorities that after he briefly lost track of Martin, the teenager approached him.  Then after the two exchanged words,  Zimmerman says he reached for his cell phone and then Martin punched him in the nose.  Zimmerman said Martin pinned him to the ground and began slamming his head into the sidewalk (concrete).

At 7:25 pm an unarmed Trayvon Martin is shot and killed on a rainy evening.

Do we know if George Zimmerman identified himself with a badge as having authority to the so-called perpetrator, Trayvon Martin?  Was George Zimmerman trained as a “Captain” watchman in safety protocol?  In what position was the gun locked, cocked and loaded with the safety on?

Eyewitnesses

When a male and/or female neighbor and others (witnesses names withheld) called “911″ at the time heard “cries for help” someone screaming and a “pop” sound an unarmed boy was hit by a bullet to his chest which Zimmerman claimed was “self-defense.”  A male witness (name withheld) says he saw Trayvon Martin shot dead claims Florida teenager and his killer George Zimmerman were scuffling on the ground with one on top of the other.  Witnesses say they saw Zimmerman standing over Martin.  First eyewitness account (anonymous man) said he reported to police details of what he saw the evening of February 26th which included watching the gunman walk away from the fight uninjured.  It contradicts a statement made by Zimmerman’s father that the unarmed black teenager broke his son’s nose and left him with injuries from slamming the man’s head onto the (sidewalk) concrete.  Eyewitness (voice disguised to protect identity) says he saw no blood and that the entire confrontation took place only on the grass not concrete.  “I saw two men on the ground, one on top of the other.  I felt they were scuffling and I heard gunshots which to me were more like pops.”  Another unnamed witness said “It was definitely a very loud predominant voice, I couldn’t hear the words, but it was like OK this wasn’t like a regular conversation.  This was someone directly yelling at someone.”  After hearing raised voice, witness said he peered out the window and saw two men grappling with each other on the ground, one on top of the other.  There were two struggles, both of which were on the grass next to a sidewalk when one of the men then cried out for help.  I heard the yell then I heard another as I would describe as an excruciating type of yell – It didn’t sound like a yell it sounded so painful.  Following the cry, he described “popping” sounds believed to be multiple gunshots.  As one of the men got up and walked away, the witness said the other man lay there on the ground face down.  It was dark and it was a side view, but it was a Hispanic man wearing a red sweater which he claims the Florida teen was in a hoodie, Zimmerman was in red, did in fact attack neighborhood watchman volunteer who was yelling to me”help! help! told him to stop I was calling “911″ he said.  Witness only wanted to be identified as “John” and did not want to be shown on camera.

Another completely conflicting witness in the Trayvon Martin killing, a neighbor is rebutting George Zimmerman’s claim of self-defense.  Mary Cutcher and her roommate say they went outside after hearing shots fired and spotted Zimmerman on top of Martin, “straddling the body” basically a foot on both sides of Trayvon’s body and his hands pressed on his back.  At that point Cutcher says Zimmerman never turned him over or tried to help him with CPR or anything.  And for me I was shocked to see , Oh my God, it’s a kid.  Skinny, baby-faced said the roommate.  After he shot Martin, Zimmerman just walked around with his hands on his head like he was in shock.  Who was crying during the incident is also a muddle.  The crying “sounded young” said Mary Cutcher.  It didn’t sound like a grown man is my point, sounded to me like someone was in distress and  it wasn’t like a crying, sobbing boo-hoo, it was a definite “whine.”

Joe Oliver (one of Zimmerman’s friends) said, “He (Zimmerman) was in shambles after the fatal shooting of young Martin.”  Oliver claimed the voice on “911″ tape belonged to Zimmerman, but Martin’s mother, Sybrina Fulton has claimed its her son.

At the time of incident which ended around 7:30 pm,  Zimmerman tells police (written in police report) he shot Martin in self-defense.  Officer Timothy Smith writes down that Zimmerman is bleeding from the nose and head.  Officer found Zimmerman’s weapon, a 9mm semi-automatic handgun in his waistband holster, handcuffed him and was taken into custody for questioning.  His gun license has not been revoked so does George Zimmerman still have the weapon?  You would think police officers would have taken it away to protect the public.  Florida Civil Rights Association protested outside Department of Licensing that Zimmerman’s gun be taken away from him.

George Zimmerman has not been charged or arrested by Sanford Florida Police Department for Trayvon Martin’s killing due to lack of probable cause under “Stand Your Ground” Law, nor did they administer a drug or alcohol test which is standard procedure, but they did for Martin.  Sanford PD report shows exactly how they categorized the incident as “Homicide-Negligent Manslaughter-Unnecessary Killing to Prevent Unlawful Act.”  Is it possible Zimmerman “Getting Away with Murder?

No prosecutor ever came to the crime scene.  First detective to question George Zimmerman was a narcotics officer not a homicide detective.  Lead homicide investigator, Charles Serino did not believe Zimmerman’s story of self-defense and recommended he be charged with manslaughter.  On February 26th evening of Trayvon Martin’s killing the investigator filed affidavit.

George Zimmerman given Voice Stress Test

On the night of Trayvon Martin shooting, George Zimmerman was given a voice stress test (like a polygraph) upon interrogation by detectives.  A grand jury indictment and criminal trial looks probable.  Zimmerman defense are preparing demand for discovery from State Attorney.

At the time of Martin killing, Seminole County State Attorney Norman R. Wolfinger claimed there was not enough evidence to charge George Zimmerman with negligible homicide or manslaughter, but now that office is considering on whether to file charges.

Change.org platform

On March 8th, Martin’s parents start a petition for Zimmerman’s arrest on change.org an online “social action platform.”  There are now over 2.2 million signatures.   NAACP ask Justice Department to get involved in the investigation.

On March 12th, Sanford Police Chief Bill Lee says George Zimmerman has not been charged because there are no grounds to disprove his account of the events leading up to shooting.

Case has led to protesters rallies and sparked nationwide debate about race and legality of self defense on “Stand Your Ground” law which gives Floridians the right to use deadly force defending themselves in public places without first trying to escape.  Trayvon Martin was black, Zimmerman’s father is white and his mother is Hispanic.

On March 16th in a letter to newspaper, George Zimmerman’s father writes that  his son has been unfairly portrayed as a racist.  Robert Zimmerman states that his son is Hispanic and grew up in a multiracial family.

Police “911″ tapes released to Martin’s parents

On Monday, March 16th Martin’s parents file a subpoena and gain access to seven police “911″ tapes on evening of the shooting and portions of it are made public. An affidavit of Sybrina Fulton indicates “mother has reviewed all 911 calls and identified the voice crying for help as her son, Trayvon Martin.”  Another recording indicates Zimmerman said “He was following Martin” and dispatcher tells him “That’s not necessary.”  There are sounds “cries for help” in the background.  Martin’s family demands an arrest,and petitions calling for the same gain thousands of signatures.

U.S. Justice Department

On Monday, March 19th the U.S. Justice Department (Attorney General Eric Holder) launched an investigation into Trayvon Martin’s death at parents’ request.  Florida Gov. Rick Scott asks state officials to assist in the investigation.

Florida Black Caucus

On Tuesday, March 20th Florida Legislative “24 member” Black Caucus represented by Democratic State Rep. Mia Jones who fought for passage of “Stand Your Ground” law that authorities say has prevented them from arresting Trayvon Martin’s shooter, George Zimmerman claiming he acted in self-defense.  Jones has sent letters to Attorney General Eric Holder and Florida Gov. Rick Scott calling for a Federal impartial probe of police handling into shooting and death of unarmed Trayvon Martin.

Florida Representative sponsored “Stand Your Ground” law

On March 20th, Florida Rep. Dennis Baxley who sponsored “Stand Your Ground” law in 2005, says nothing in it allows people to “pursue and confront.”  The law allows people to use deadly force to defend themselves anywhere they feel a reasonable fear of death or serious injury.  Justice Department sends a team to Sanford to “investigate and address tension in the community.”

International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination

March 21st has been designated as “International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination.”  Racism continues to cause suffering for people globally.  Recently grieving mother said her son 17-year-0ld Trayvon Martin was killed because of the “color of his skin.”

“Million Hoodie March” Trayvon Martin Tribute

On Tuesday, March 21st Martin’s parents join thousands of protesters in NYC demanding justice, a tribute to Trayvon Martin who was wearing a hooded sweatshirt at time of his death.  Many other protests will follow across the country.

Police Chief Lee Steps Down Temporarily

On Wednesday, March 22nd there was a special meeting at City Hall where the Sanford Commissioner Mark McCarthy and council members called for Police Chief Bill Lee’s resignation and voted 3 to 2 “no confidence” in him.  Sanford City Manager, Norton Bonaparte, Jr. and Banker/Part-time Mayor Jeff Triplett were asked whether either of them would order George Zimmerman’s arrest, but neither wanted to comment on it.   The Sanford City Manager has the last say on whether or not to fire Chief Bill Lee.  So far he is being replaced temporarily.

State Attorney Request to be Recused

On Thursday, March 22nd, State Attorney Norman R. Wolfinger recused himself from Martin case in light of public safety for the citizens of Seminole County and for any conflict of interest he respectfully requested another State Attorney be assigned to the investigation and prosecution arising from the circumstances surrounding Trayvon Martin’s death.

Newt Gingrich on Martin Investigation

On March 22nd, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich calls the killing of Trayvon Martin tragic, but investigation being handled correctly.  Most likely Florida’s “Stand Your Ground” law does not not apply.

Pres. Obama calls Trayvon Martin killing national tragedy

On March 23rd, President Obama reflects on Trayvon Martin killing calling it a national tragedy.  Federal, state and local authorities are now working together and will figure out exactly how this tragedy happened to Trayvon Martin.  “If I had a son, he’d look like Trayvon.”

Geraldo Rivera apologized for harsh “hoodie” remark

On March 23rd, Fox News Host Geraldo Rivera spoke out that Trayvon Martin was partially responsible for his death as was Florida neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman because the teenager was wearing a “hoodie” provoked outrage in the community.

Russell Simmons co-founder “Def Jam” not accepting apology

Geraldo Rivera has since apologized, but that did not stop hip-hop mogul Russell Simmons publicly blasting TV host’s anti-hoodie gangsta’ clothing message about Trayvon Martin.  Simmons posted on his “Global Grind” website “Geraldo, your apology is bull – It’s nothing but a defense of a racist.”  “Rivera my friend for many years.”  And I generally don’t speak like this, but I have to say it like it is.  It’s a non-apology that continues to blame the victim for their appearance.”

Jeb Bush on “Stand Your Ground” Law

On March 23rd, former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush says “Stand Your Ground” law does not apply in killing of Trayvon Martin.

On March 23rd Florida Gov. Rick Scott assigns State Attorney Angela Corey to examine the case and announces a task force to look into the controversial “Stand Your Ground” law.

New Black Panther Party threats against Zimmerman

On March 24th, at a Florida protest, leader of the New Black Panthers Michael Muhammed announces “dead or alive” $10,000 bounty for George Zimmerman who is in hiding.

Trayvon Martin Family

On March 26th Martin family confirm that their son Trayvon had been suspended at high school he was attending on basis of trace amounts of marijuana found in his backpack.

Zimmerman’s attorney leaves Orlando studio

On March 27th, MSNBC moderator Lawrence O’Donnell’s scheduled interview turns sour when George Zimmerman’s attorney, Craig Sonner leaves Orlando studio before the show.

Trayvon Family meet with Judiciary Committee

On Tuesday, March 27th Trayvon Martin’s parents, Sybrina Fulton and Tracy Martin met with D.C. Democratic Judiciary Committee on hate crimes and profiling.  They wanted the Committee to know that their son Trayvon was a hero.  At the age of nine he saved  his father’s life by pulling him from a burning kitchen.  Trayvon loved all sorts of sports especially horseback riding.  He never got to fulfill his dreams of attending college and becoming an aviation mechanic.  Now it’s all gone due to George Zimmerman shooting our son, Trayvon.

Oprah Winfrey

Oprah Winfrey hopes justice will be served for Trayvon Martin.

Music Legend Tribute to Trayvon Martin

Music legend Chaka Khan and other R&B singers in hoodies sing new version of song “Super Life” as a tribute to Trayvon Martin.

Comedian Bill Cosby “Power-of-the-Gun”

The famous comedian said “neighbor watch volunteers”  like George Zimmerman who shot and killed unarmed teenager, should not be allowed to carry guns.  “Without a gun, I don’t see Zimmerman approaching Trayvon by himself.”  Power-of-the gun mentality had him unafraid to approach someone.  Even police call for backup in certain situations.  “When you carry a gun, you mean to harm somebody, kill someone.”

Rep.  Bobby Rush Wears Hoodie

On March 28th Rep. Bobby Rush a Democrat from Illinois serving his “10th” term in Congress wears a hoodie protesting killing of Trayvon Martin is escorted off the House floor.

Robert Zimmerman, Jr. on Martin tragedy

On March 28th, Robert Zimmerman, Jr. who appeared on National TV calls the shooting a tragedy says he’s only basing a conclusion on what happened to Trayvon Martin when brother George told him and the family that Martin threatened and tried to get his handgun.  The two struggled falling to the ground allegedly hitting a sidewalk (concrete) or grassy area.  George suffered a bloody broken nose and head injuries.  If George didn’t do what he did, my brother would have been dead.

Zimmerman’s Father

It is now known that George and Robert’s father is a retired magistrate from the United States who recently made a statement on March 29th over national TV (hiding his face) that “Trayvon Martin beat his son and threatened to kill him.”  Robert Zimmerman, Sr. claims his son decided to follow Martin so he could obtain an address to give to police officers.

Surveillance Video of George Zimmerman

On March 29th surveillance video taken of George Zimmerman handcuffed getting out of a police car at Sanford Police Station on February 26th the evening Trayvon Martin was shot and killed failed to show a bloody or bruised suspect.  Zimmerman claimed “self-defense” saying that after he spotted Martin thinking he was involved in criminal activity called “911″ then followed him and when Zimmerman turned around to return to his vehicle Martin came up from behind and beat him.  Trayvon Martin punched George Zimmerman in the nose, knocked him to the ground and repeatedly beat him slamming his head against the concrete.  Authorities must believe that George Zimmerman was put into an extremely difficult position where  he feared for his life and there was no other alternative but to use “brute force.”

An enhanced police video shows some kind of wound that looks like “two gashes or welt marks” on the back of Zimmerman’s head is described in a police report by Zimmerman to investigators that Martin jumped him from behind, punched him in the nose and pounded his head into the (sidewalk) concrete.

Spike Lee Tweet

On March 29th Film Director Spike Lee tweets an incorrect Florida address for Zimmerman leading to  harassment of an innocent couple.  He later apologized and compensated them.

George Zimmerman’s Violent Temper

Now we find out that George Zimmerman had a violent temper.  He was like a “Dr. Jekyll and a Mr. Hyde.”  So it’s no surprise that information has emerged about George Zimmerman’s high school disciplinary records and history of violence since the Trayvon Martin shooting.  He was fired from a job securing illegal house parties for “being too aggressive with patrons” says an anonymous former co-worker.  Zimmerman worked from 2001 to 2005 earning around $50 t0 $100 a night for the parties.  He worked for two agencies that provided security to house parties.  One evening a woman got drunk at a party and George who we thought was such a “cool guy” went nuts, picked her up and threw the woman causing her a twisted ankle.  Everyone flipped when they saw George engaged in rage.  A review of court files details a domestic violence case between George Zimmerman and ex-fiancee in 2005 where he claimed she slapped him, hit him in the chest and tried to choke him.  According to police report she said scratches came from her doggie.  Then in 2002 Zimmerman sexually groped her and threw her on a bed, a judge ordered an injunction that both parties are forbidden contact with each other.

George Michael Zimmerman completed an introductory course in citizen’s law enforcement.  At the time of the Trayvon Martin shooting he was working toward an Associate Degree at Seminole State College, but his enrollment was withdrawn due to the controversy.

Thousands of Activists Demand Arrest of George Zimmerman

On Saturday, March 31st at Sanford City Hall thousands of activists from across the country, together with civil rights leaders, NAACP, Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev. Jesse Jackson vent their anger on the shooting of Trayvon Martin and demand the arrest of George Zimmerman.

Attorney Benjamin Crump’s letter to Justice Department

On Monday, April 1st Trayvon Martin’s family will be sending a formal request letter via Benjamin Crump their legal counsel to the U.S. Justice Department Civil Rights Division which has already started its investigation.  They want them to look into the possibility of interference between State Attorney, Norm Wolfinger and Sanford Florida Police Chief Bill Lee meeting hours after teen shooting not agreeing with lead homicide investigator Charles Serino’s advice to arrest George Zimmerman.

State Attorney’s response to Benjamin Crump

On Monday, April 2nd an outraged Florida prosecutor lashes out at Trayvon Martin family of “their account” that he had a meeting with local police and agreed not to follow a detective’s advice to arrest George Zimmerman for manslaughter.  State Attorney Norm Wolfinger’s response was “swift and forceful” to Benjamin Crump, attorney for Martin family’s new allegation as “outright lies” insisting that “no such meeting occurred” or any type of communication.

The funeral director says there were no bruises, cuts, blood on Trayvon Martin’s hands or body other than the bullet hole that killed him.

Sanford Mayor “We’re not here to hide anything on Martin Killing”

Part-time Sanford Mayor Jeff Triplett says police, prosecutor and city attorney opposed releasing “911 calls” because of the ongoing investigation.  He questioned it, and continually asked why wouldn’t we do this?  Despite disapproval Triplett felt we’re not here to hide anything on the Martin killing.

“911″ Tape Reviewed by Experts

On Monday, April 2nd two voice experts listen to and review “911 call” claim cries heard of someone screaming were not from George Zimmerman.  Yet another expert’s analysis is that Zimmerman whispered “punks” before shooting  Trayvon Martin.

FBI investigation into shooting

On April 3rd, FBI announces its own investigation into the shooting.

Jose Baez, Defense Attorney for Casey Anthony

Defense attorney for Casey Anthony, Jose Baez says he predicts no conviction for George Zimmerman.  He distinctly remembers hearing on the “911″ tape George Zimmerman saying “He’s now walking towards me and it looks like he (Martin) has something in his waistband.”  This is a decision George Zimmerman had to make in a split second and to go back and “second guess” it the way we’re doing, it’s a luxury that Mr. Zimmerman didn’t have.”

National Survey on Martin Shooting

According to a national survey far more Republicans than Democrats say there’s been too much coverage of Martin shooting.  In addition 43% of whites said the story gathered too much coverage compared with just 16% of blacks across the country.

NBC Fires Producer

Rush to judgment in Martin case.  There were Media mistakes.  NBC network decision to air on Monday, April 2nd morning “Today” show an edited “911″ phone call from George Zimmerman to police dispatcher just before he shot Trayvon Martin was a “mistake” and not “deliberate” to misrepresent.according to NBC news President Steve Capus who apologized to viewers.

The fact is that “Today” morning show segment took this approach as a key part of dispatcher’s call “This guy looks like he’s up to no good.  He looks black.”  When Zimmerman said: “This guy is up to no good.  Or he’s on drugs or something.  It’s raining and he’s just walking around, looking about.”  Dispatcher replying, “OK, and this guy is he black, white or Hispanic?  Zimmerman simply answered “He looks black.”  NBC unnamed producer at a Miami-based studio who edited “911 tape” was fired.

Hal Uhrig, New Attorney for George Zimmerman

On Wednesday, April 4th George Zimmerman’s new attorney Hal Uhrig speaks out on CNN’s Piers Morgan that his client had every right to carry his licensed gun and legally entitled to defend himself the night he shot and killed 17-year-old Trayvon Martin, but Martin family attorney, Benjamin Crump disagrees saying Zimmerman should not have been in possession of a gun as a neighborhood volunteer watchman.  Attorney Uhrig says “The reason Trayvon Martin is dead is not because he was black, or that he wore a hoodie or because he was walking in the rain.  It’s because that 6-foot-3 young man made a terrible decision and bad judgment when he decided to smack somebody in the face and break their nose, jumping on them and smacking their head into the ground, and in doing that, put him in a reasonable fear for his safety.”  Uhrig put the blame on various rallies around the country for racial profiling.  Sanford was a peaceful community until “these rallies and irresponsible speeches” that racial profiling was an even issue.   Regarding “911 dispatcher” ordering Zimmerman to stop following Trayvon, Uhrig said it’s all been spun over and over again, the dispatcher simply told Zimmerman they did not need him to do that.  In Trayvon Martin case, Attorneys Hal Uhrig and Craig Sonner deny “racial slur.”

Boycott hits ALEC “Stand Your Ground” Gun Laws

On Wednesday, April 4th well-known companies such as Coca-Cola and PepsiCo stated they do not take positions on issues, have dropped their membership in “ALEC” American League Membership Council a conservative organization behind “Stand Your Ground” gun laws.  In 2005 lawmakers and lobbyists took Florida’s “Stand Your Ground ” statute and turned it into model legislation which produced similar laws in a dozen states.  ColorofChange.org and other civil rights groups launched an online drive against Coca-Cola calling for them to stop underwriting ALEC on voter ID laws suppressing minorities are discriminatory.  Kraft Foods spokesman said the company will keep its membership in ALEC.

Good Friday Tribute Services for Trayvon Martin

On Friday, April 6th the all black A.M.E. Zion Church of Tarrytown, New York built in 1860 will hold Good Friday tribute services inside and outside the church with parishioners wearing hoodies remembering Trayvon Martin.

Pointing finger at previous history of Police Investigators

In the summer of 2010, a masked gun man gunned down a black 17-year-old teenager, Ikeem Ruffin in an apartment complex on Sanford’s south side.  When police arrived at the scene they found him dead and another teenager beside Ruffin’s body calling for an ambulance.  The next day police charged teenager with robbery and murder, but prosecutors dropped murder charge last August stating another man, still unidentified, pulled trigger.  Victim’s mother said the police overlooked important evidence, including a witness who pointed the finger at another suspect, and allowed son’s killer to go free.  Teresa Ruffin, mother of victim sees similar patterns between her son’s murder and how they investigated the killing of Trayvon Martin.

Special Prosecutor “No Grand Jury”

On Monday, April 9th Seminole County Special Prosecutor Angela Corey says investigation still continues has reversed her decision to use “Grand Jury” should not be considered a factor on whether or not charges will eventually be brought against George Zimmerman for the killing of Trayvon Martin.

Attorney Benjamin Crump says Martin family not surprised by prosecutor’s announcement are hopeful a decision will be reached very soon to arrest George Zimmerman giving the family and others who support them the “simple justice” they are seeking.  On the same day, one protest forced temporary closing of  Sanford Police Department after six demonstrators blocked entrance to building.  We only hope marches and rallies will be peaceful and orderly said Norton Bonaporte, Jr. City Manager.

George Zimmerman’s Website Asking for Money

After weeks of seclusion, George Zimmerman speaks out about the incident as a “life altering event.”  He makes no mention of killing Trayvon Martin only tragic time and intense media coverage on his website therealgeorgezimmerman.com where he’s asking for donations to his legal defense fund and living expenses via paypal account.  Zimmerman sounds off by saying “I have been forced to leave my home, my school, my employer, my family, and ultimately my entire life, but ensuring my supporters every donation is appreciated.  Robert Zimmerman, Sr. and lawyers Craig Sonner and Hal Uhrig set up a bank account for donations directly to paypal in the name of George Zimmerman.

Lawyers no longer advising George Zimmerman

On Tuesday, April 10th lawyers Craig Sonner and Hal Uhrig for George Zimmerman announce they are no longer his legal advisers.  Since Sunday there has been no contact either by phone or email from Zimmerman.  Attorneys standing outside Seminole County Courthouse let the media and public know that George Zimmerman never retained them.  George has called Special Prosecutor Angela Corey and Sean Hannity of Fox News without advising his lawyers.  Special Prosecutor told George she would not speak to him without an attorney.  Lawyers state George Zimmerman looks thin and they haven’t even seen him.  They also believe he is suffering from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)  Some criminal defense attorneys agree it is outrageous for Zimmerman’s lawyers to make these comments.

Drive-by Shooting

On April 10th around 4:30 a.m. a Seminole County Sanford Police Department patrol car marked and unmanned was hit by six bullets.  Vehicle was stationed at an elementary school across the street from Twin Oaks neighborhood where Trayvon Martin shooting occurred to decrease protesters and loiterers.  Neighbors called “911″ when they heard several “pops” that sounded like shots.  Police believe it was a “drive-by” shooting.

Murder in Second Degree

On Wednesday, April 11th, 57-year-old Florida Special Prosecutor Angele B. Corey announced she will pursue “second-degree murder” charge in Trayvon Martin killing.   Capias was issued for George Zimmerman and he turned himself in to police.   He is seen stepping out of FDLE van with a shirt over his head and a guard taking him into the Seminole County John E. Polk Correctional Facility for photo and booking.  Zimmerman is in a 67 sq. ft. “segregated unit” (toilet and two beds – no TV or roommate) with 3 meals a day, breakfast at 4:00 am, lunch at 10:30 am,  dinner at 4:00 pm, 3 hours of recreation per week, and no tobacco.   So far he’s purchased various items such as toiletries, undergarments, snacks, Jolly Ranchers, “beef sticks” tortilla chips and root beer., including lens solution, playing cards and shampoo.  His account has a balance of $41.16 according to jail officials.  Murder in the second degree can carry a sentence of life in prison.

Sybrina Fulton, Trayvon’s mother expressed her gratitude, “I say thank you, thank you Jesus.”

Zimmerman sought Tiger Woods’ Lawyer

On April 11th Mark Nejame the attorney for the well-known golfer Tiger Woods said in an interview (hired as CNN legal analyst for Martin case) that he was asked about a month ago to represent George Zimmerman, but declined to take the case because of time restraints.  Nejame suggested five lawyers, including Mark O’Mara who he likes as a person, is a friend and respects him tremendously was hired by  Zimmerman.

Mark O’Mara Zimmerman’s New Attorney

On April 11th Mark O’Mara an Orlando attorney with 30+ years board certified in criminal and family law is hired by George Zimmerman.  Speaking on “Today” show Mr. O’Mara said his client is nervous, stressed and very tired hoping to get bail.  Overall he’s doing okay, but wants to be out of jail to help with his defense.

NYC Mayor Bloomberg on “Stand Your Ground” Law

On April 11th NYC Mayor Bloomberg launched a nationwide campaign to repeal NRA-backed “Stand Your Ground” laws.   Bloomberg refers to so-called “Stand Your Ground” laws  as gun laws that justify “civilian gun play” posing a threat to public safety and undermines the integrity of our nation’s justice system while making it more difficult to prosecute shooters.  It’s “vigilantism.”

Brief Court Appearance

Thursday, April 12th at 1:30 pm a handcuffed and frightened George Zimmerman standing beside his attorney, Mark O’Mara on first appearance (courtroom inside Sanford John E. Polk Correctional Facility) enters a plea of “not guilty” on murder in the second-degree before Judge Mark Herr.  First appearance only lasted about four minutes.  Zimmerman wore a gray jumpsuit, had a goatee consistent with booking  photo.  He spoke only to answer with “Yes, Sir” when replying to Judge Herr.  Judge said he found probable cause to move ahead with the case and set a May 29th date before another judge for Zimmerman’s formal arraignment.  Attorney is expected to request a bond hearing.  “There’s a  high likelihood case could be dismissed by the judge before a jury gets to hear it” says one defense attorney.  Another defense attorney says, “the law puts a tremendous burden on the state to prove that it wasn’t self-defense.”

Probable Cause

Probable cause (3-page affidavit) filed by special prosecutor Angela Corey states that Zimmerman “profiled” Trayvon who was “unarmed and not committing a crime.”  Zimmerman assumed Martin was a “criminal (who) did not belong in the gated community.”  Some other facts are a little fuzzy where it says Zimmerman confronted Martin and a struggle ensued – Zimmerman the only surviving eyewitness to the event says he was headed back to his car when Trayvon attacked him.   There’s some physical evidence that Zimmerman was injured.

Zimmerman Arrest Affidavit says word used was “Punks”  and here’s the affidavit of probable cause submitted for the arrest of George Zimmerman on second degree murder charges for shooting death of Trayvon Martin.  It is written and sworn to by States’ Attorney Special Investigators, T.C. O’Steen and Dale Gilbreath, both former investigators with the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Department.  They don’t believe there was a “racial slur.”  During the recorded call Zimmerman made reference to people he felt had committed and gotten away with break-ins in his neighborhood.  Later while talking about Martin, Zimmerman stated these a*holes, they always get away and also said “these f*cking punks.”  Incredibly affidavit claims without support that Zimmerman was “profiling” Martin.  It misrepresents what the dispatcher said to Zimmerman, calling it an “instruction” not to follow Martin.  (The dispatcher said “We don’t need you to do that” to which Zimmerman responded “OK.”)

Attorney’s Request for Bond Hearing

Mark O’Mara, attorney for George Zimmerman filed papers for a bond hearing at court appearance which is scheduled for Friday, April 20th at 9:0o a.m.  Attorney will argue that Zimmerman be allowed to remain free on bond – Pointing to the fact that his client did not flee area during the six weeks after he shot and killed Trayvon Martin.

Nothing in the affidavit to indicate Zimmerman was motivated by race, but in cellphone call to “911″ Zimmerman made reference to people he felt had committed and gotten away with break-ins in his neighborhood.  George Zimmerman could be facing life in prison.  Attorney O’Mara said, “I can’t imagine the case going to trial within the year.”  I would like him out so he can help me in preparing for his defense with whatever conditions the court deems appropriate to protect him and the process. ”

Motion to Recuse Judge (Conflict of Interest)

Attorney Mark O’Mara will likely be filing a motion to recuse Seminole Circuit Court Judge Jessica Recksiedler from the Trayvon Martin case due to possible conflict of interest as judge’s husband, Jason Recksiedler is an associate at law firm of famed attorney Mark NeJame.  Judge Recksiedler will probably make her decision before bond hearing on Friday.

O’Mara an experienced defense attorney who gets $400/hour for Family Law says Zimmerman’s defense costs could reach $1 million in a case like this.  Attorney states “Stand Your Ground statute has some troublesome portions to it and we’re going to have some discussions and conversations about it as a State, but right now it is the law of Florida and it is the law that is going to have an impact on this case.”  Attorney asks public not to rush to judgment.

To prove their case, prosecutors must show that Zimmerman committed an “imminently dangerous” act that showed a “depraved” lack for human life which he still claims was in self-defense.  Zimmerman has an uphill battle ahead of him.

Sybrina Fulton’s interview with Bill O’Reilly of Fox News

On Thursday evening, April 12th Bill O’Reilly interviews Sybrina Fulton with her attorney on the arrest of George Zimmerman.  O’Reilly who has been critical about media coverage for their “rush to judgment” on Martin’s case told Fulton he was so sorry about the loss of  her son.  Can’t imagine the pain you’re going through, and I think all Americans are feeling the same pain.  We all want justice for Trayvon.  From the beginning we’ve called for calm.  Let’s not convict Zimmerman on television.  O’Reilly said he called Sharpton to apologize.  Sharpton should apologize for some of the things he said at rallies. Al  Sharpton a host for MSNBC has been a vocal proponent for justice in killing of Martin organizing rallies in Florida with activists and the Martin family.  Was I wrong to say what I did O’Reilly asked Fulton?  Sybrina Fulton said Sharpton “also promotes peace” and she and her husband called for peaceful demonstrations.   O’Reilly called the Fultons and their attorney Benjamin Crump “magnificent,” but that others around the country have riled up emotions.  Crump replied, “That was necessary to arrest Zimmerman.”   O’Reilly said, “We’re all Americans here.  No one wants their 17-year-old son shot down on the street and Mr. Zimmerman doesn’t want to see his son’s life ruined because of this.  It comes down to a tragedy all the way around.  We have to handle it with the utmost respect. ”

Trayvon’s brother, Jahvaris Fulton

On April 13th Jahvaris Fulton, Trayvon’s big brother, a college student at Florida International University speaks out on how he doesn’t want to clout the memory of this bright positive teen.  Jahvaris repeats what he told police in late March after shooter’s brother and father went on national TV claiming  George Zimmerman acted in self-defense.  Father saying, something like  “my brother was on top of your son” and “You’re going to die tonight” which does not sound like my brother.  Soft-spoken Jahvaris Fulton said Trayvon was an honor student who couldn’t wait to go to college.   He was bright, positive, happy and probably going to be somebody.

Slain Teen’s Mom comment It was “an accident”

On April 13th the day George Zimmerman was charged with second-degree murder, Sybrina Fulton says “He (Trayvon) wasn’t violent.  So for him to actually jump on someone he doesn’t even know, to me that’s not him -  he’s smarter than that.”  I believe it just got out of control and Zimmerman couldn’t turn the clock back she told “Today” show.   Fulton said Zimmerman “stalked and murdered” Trayvon in “cold blood.”  Fulton told Ann Curry of “Today” that she wanted Zimmerman to apologize for fatally shooting her son and had a list of questions she wanted to ask the 28-year-old volunteer watchman.  Did you know he was a minor,  a teenager that did not have a weapon.  My son was “profiled and murdered” by George Zimmerman and there was nothing accidental about that.  The severity of the charge shows prosecutors don’t believe the February 26th slaying was an accident.  We wanted nothing more, nothing less than an arrest.  If it means he (Zimmerman) may not be found guilty, we just want him to be found accountable.   We’re happy that he was arrested so that he can give his side of the story.  Ann Curry asks slain teenager’s father what he would say to people who felt Zimmerman’s arrest had to do more with public pressure than with merits of the case.  Tracy Martin responds by saying had the Sanford Police Department did a thorough and impartial investigation from the beginning,  George Zimmerman would have been locked up from day one and there wouldn’t have been such a huge public outcry to arrest Zimmerman.

Fulton “HLN” interview

Sybrina Fulton wanted to clarify comments she made earlier in the day on “Today” show that she believed it was “an accident” George Zimmerman killed her son Trayvon.  In an interview with HLN’s Nancy Grace, Fulton tells her she was referring to teen’s encounter with Zimmerman and not the shooting itself.  “In no way, shape, form or fashion did I imply the shooting was an accident – I don’t believe that it was an accident.  I believe he (Zimmerman) got out of his vehicle, he had an intent in his mind, and he carried out the intent, and that’s why my son Trayvon is no longer with us. “  Fulton expounded on her comments made to “Today” show’s Ann Curry Thursday morning  that were taken out of context.  “I still believe a person should apologize when they are remorseful of what they’ve done.  I believe it was an accident that just got out of control and he (Zimmerman) couldn’t turn the clock back” she told Curry.   At a press conference Attorney Mark O’Mara said the defense would not be going after Fulton’s comments.  They (the parents) have gone through a horrible tragedy.

LA Urban League supports decision to arrest Zimmerman

After arrest and charges were filed against George Zimmerman in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin, LA Urban League supports charges of second-degree murder.

Rodney King “The Riot Within” grieves for Trayvon Martin

43-year-old Rodney King  who appears on Dr. Drew’s “Celebrity Rehab” has been bankrupt for sometime is now promoting his memoir “The Riot Within” a journey from rebellion to redemption.  “I know that pain, that screaming.”  He says “Trayvon Martin killing reminds him of his beating 20 years ago in LA.  At the time thought I was going to die.”  It’s something bigger than race – It’s about justice.

Andy Bell Denver Artist

31-year-old art student Andy Bell about to graduate from  Metropolitan State College in Denver sketches Zimmerman’s mugshot titled “Fear Itself” using more than 12,000 Skittles.

Media outlets want access to unseal court documents

On Monday, April 16th motions were filed with Circuit Court of Seminole County by television stations and newspapers such as the Tribune, Miami Herald and Associated Press to have court documents unsealed in the case against George Zimmerman charged with second-degree murder of unarmed African American teenager Trayvon Martin.

The friction between public’s right and lawyers to protect their clients (defendants) in high-profile cases would normally be of public record in Florida for anyone to see, but were sealed last week at request of Attorney Mark O’Mara that access to court file and further discovery documents be restricted and office of special prosecutor Angela B. Corey agreed.

First Lady sends condolences to Trayvon’s parents

On Tuesday, April 17th in an NPR (National Public Radio) interview Michelle Obama shared her thoughts and condolences on the devastating murder of Trayvon Martin.   From racial tensions of a nation, Mrs. Obama shifts high-profile case back to its heart the two people who lost their son in a violent act.   My heart goes out to the parents because we all as parents understand a tragedy of that magnitude.   Mrs. Obama made it clear that “race” conversation cannot end with Trayvon Martin.  Talking is good – Conversations have to be forever.  We as a country have to continue to talk about these issues.  America is a wonderful place to live, but because it is so diverse, our challenges are complex.  There’s no one-shot solution to this.  It takes patience, time, openness and comparison.

Eric Holder at Sharpton’s Annual Convention

On April 17th Attorney General Eric Holder’s appearance as a speaker at Rev. Al Sharpton’s annual convention in which Trayvon Martin case was one of the top issues, seems to be an Obama “political ploy” in an election year.

Judge Lester appointed in murder case against Zimmerman

On Wednesday, April 18th Chief Judge Alan Dickey who appointed Lester to preside over case said Judge Recksiedler is very capable of presiding over this case or any other criminal case, and I also have complete confidence in Judge Lester.   Whether or not Judge Lester will handle bond hearing set for Friday is still unclear.  Several news agencies have filed papers to unseal the court records.

Gov. Rick Scott Task Force to review “Stand Your Ground” Law

On Thursday, April 19th Governor Rick Scott and Lt. Governor Jennifer Carroll announced a special 19-member Task Force panel on “Citizen Protection and Safety” created in response to the shooting death of Trayvon Martin over State of Florida’s controversial “Stand Your Ground” law.   Carroll will chair Task Force along with vice chair Rev. R.B.  Jones, Jr. pastor of Bethel Missionary Baptist Church in Tallahassee and other appointed members across the State of Florida.  Gov. Scott said “The purpose of this Task Force on Citizen Safety and Protection is to thoroughly review Fla. Statute Chapter 776 and any other laws, rules and regulations or programs that relate to public safety and citizen protection.  They (Task Force) will make any necessary recommendations to the Governor and Legislature to improve safety within State of Florida. “  “We are a nation of laws, and I am committed to letting our legal system work to ensure the people in our State are safe and protected.  I have the utmost confidence that these Task Force members are the best people for leading a review of Florida’s citizen safety laws.”  “We look forward to hearing from the citizens of our State about their concerns and recommendations for keeping Florida safe.   “I have tapped a diverse and qualified group to carefully review our laws and policies.”

New judge presiding over Bond Hearing

On Friday, April 20th at 9:00 a.m. Circuit Judge Kenneth E. Lester, Jr. will preside over bond hearing to determine whether or not Zimmerman be granted bail and setting the amount for defendant to get out of jail.  Zimmerman killed unarmed 17-year-old African-American Trayvon Martin on the evening of February 26th in Sanford, Florida with a registered handgun.  Lester is “no soft touch” says Zimmerman’s lawyer.

Attorney Mark O’Mara takes case “pro bono”

Mark O’Mara takes case “pro bono” (not charging a fee) as George Zimmerman has been declared by the court indigent.

Zimmerman enters courtroom shackled

George Zimmerman wearing a loose fitted dark blue suit in shackles and what appears underneath to be a bullet-proof vest enters courtroom sitting down next to attorney, Mark O’Mara and Lorna Truett, his legal assistant shaking hands.  Attorney addresses Judge Lester saying  his client wants to make a statement.

Zimmerman stands before Judge and takes the stand

George Zimmerman sitting before a packed courtroom expresses his apology to the parents of Trayvon Martin who were with their attorneys during bond hearing as he stated “I am sorry for the loss of your son.  I did not know how old he was.  I thought he was a little bit younger than I am.  I did not know if he was armed or not, ” directly addressing Martin’s family.  Trayvon’s father, Tracy Martin was crying throughout the hearing with “tears of anger” after the apology said Benjamin Crump, his attorney.  Natalie Jackson, co-attorney says, “This was the most unmeaningful apology.”  “This was the most unfair and disingenuous thing I’ve ever seen.”

Tough lead prosecutor questions Zimmerman

Lead prosecutor Bernie De La Rionda asks George Zimmerman why he didn’t apologize earlier to the Martin parents.  Zimmerman responds “He was told not to contact Martin family.”

Zimmerman’s family testifies by phone “He would not flee”

Zimmerman’s wife, Shellie (who is a student nurse) spoke by phone saying “He is absolutely not violent or a threat to the community.”  Lead prosecutor addresses the fact that Zimmerman took anger management classes after attacking an undercover police officer and had a restraining order against him after assaulting his former girlfriend.

Zimmerman’s father Robert made the following statement, that even when confronted, his son was likely to “turn the other cheek.”  The father described his son’s injuries the morning after Martin got shot.  He said George had a cut and swollen lip, a protective cover over his nose and gashes on the back of  his head.

Zimmerman’s mother, Gladys said, her son worked with two black children as part of a mentoring program that required him to venture into a dangerous neighborhood.  He said, “Mom if I don’t go, they don’t have nobody.”

Attorney Mark O’Mara stated he sought this special allowance and addressed it before bond hearing for family to speak by phone to “protect their privacy and safety.”

George “Model Neighbor”

Zimmerman’s neighbor, Frank Taaffe who told news media that the voice he heard howling on the tape of a “911″ call was  Zimmerman not teenager Martin, also insisted Zimmerman who is Hispanic, is not a racist.  Taaffe tells Anderson Cooper of CNN that George was a “model neighbor” and tried to ensure the safety of residents on his block as a watchman.  Taaffe was also a volunteer watchman in the neighborhood, but never carried a gun like Zimmerman.

Graphic Image

After surprising apology, news media obtained graphic image showing the bloody back of Zimmerman’s head apparently taken a few minutes after he shot and killed Martin.  This could give validity to Zimmerman’s claim that Martin had bashed his head with striking blows against the concrete as Zimmerman fought for his life.

Zimmerman’s Attorney Questions Investigator

Attorney Mark O’Mara makes smart strategic move by questioning Dale Gilbreath State investigator during bond hearing in which Gilbreath states that he doesn’t know whether Martin or Zimmerman threw the first punch proving weaknesses in prosecutor’s claim that Zimmerman neighborhood watchman committed “second-degree murder.”

$150,000 bond for George Zimmerman and GPS Monitor

On Friday, April 20th, Judge Lester sets bond at $150,000, but prosecutor wanted higher amount, possibly one million.  George Zimmerman has to come up with 10% ($15,000) in order to leave jail facility.

Zimmerman’s family posts bail – Walks out of jail

On Monday, April 23rd as the clock struck midnight George Zimmerman walked out of jail wearing a bullet-proof vest and GPS electronic ankle bracelet as his family came up with bond money ($15,000) by securing a loan for their home.  George got into an SUV and went into hiding (secret hideaway) as per agreement between the court and his attorney.  Zimmerman must report every two days to probation   Mark O’Mara says it may be a while before we see George Zimmerman as the trial may be a year away.

Attorney regrets Zimmerman’s courtroom apology

Trayvon Martin’s parents said they did not appreciate Zimmerman’s remorseful statement.  Attorney O’Mara replied, “Had I known that, I’m not sure we would have done that at the bond hearing because the purpose of it was to get to the family and respond directly to their request.  Had I known or been told that wasn’t the right time, it wouldn’t have happened.  So, I apologize for that.”

Police Chief Lee Resigning Permanently

On Monday, April 23rd, Sanford Police Chief Bill Lee a former homicide officer said he was resigning permanently and planning to discuss his severance package, but city commission in a 3-2 vote rejected it.  On March 22nd Lee resigned temporarily as public outrage was heard across the country accusing police of improper investigation into Martin killing.

District 4 Sanford Commissioner Patty Malany

Malany says, “It appears that Police Chief Lee is being forced out and has not violated any law or policy.”  Until the facts are known, we need more civility nationally said Patty Malany, one of the commissioners not accepting Bill Lee’s resignation.  So far he will remain on administrative leave until investigation is completed.  “The simple fact is that a young man can find himself at the end of a barrel of a gun on his way home from a convenience store alone is a tragedy.  I’m deeply saddened that someone has to stand up for Sanford.  It’s not a racist city says Malany.”

Martin family attorney on Zimmerman’s website money

Attorney Crump said Zimmerman should go back to jail for failing to disclose to the judge at recent bond hearing that he had $204,000 in website contributions.  This suggests a character issue.  The judge should immediately revoke Zimmerman’s bond for lying and be held accountable.  Attorney O’Mara said he thought Zimmerman had no money when he appeared at bond hearing.  O’Mara is still waiting for more discovery disclosure.  Attorney took control over the defense fund for Zimmerman on Wednesday.

Famous criminal defense attorney Mark Geragos said, “I know a lot of judges who would remand the guy back into custody immediately.”  “If you’ve got more money stashed in an account and you could just pay the bond and be gone, that gives a judge a lot of concern. ”

Judge reserves decision on website contributions

On Friday, April 27th hearing Circuit Court Judge Kenneth Lester, Jr. stated he would need more information before making a decision to hike Zimmerman’s bond after Assistant State Attorney Bernie De La Rionda on Thursday revealed there was “a little over $200,000″ in Zimmerman’s defense fund from anonymous donor website contributions.  Prosecutor also argued that Zimmerman’s family never revealed they had money.  Did George Zimmerman commit perjury?

There was no formal motion filed with the court to revoke Zimmerman’s bail prior to the hearing.  George’s brother, Robert Zimmerman, Jr. who is running website was never issued a subpoena by prosecutor to appear in court.

The prosecutor requested a “gag order” on public comments, but Judge Lester rejected it saying attorneys on both sides have been dealing very well with media spotlight and nothing has shocked me.

Judge instructed O’Mara to give him more details about the Paypal account so he can decide what his options are.  Before I make a decision “I may not have jurisdiction to tell anybody to do anything or else I may.”  Attorney O’Mara asked the judge to consider keeping Zimmerman’s donor list “secret” because people could be subjected to threats or unwanted public scrutiny.  O’Mara informed the court that George Zimmerman has shutdown his Twitter and website account – “He has no internet presence – all websites are now down,”

Witness Protection

Witnesses are extremely worried and have expressed fear regarding Martin shooting that their names will be revealed to the press under Florida’s “Sunshine Laws.”

Attorney Benjamin Brafman on “Stand Your Ground” Law

On Monday, April 30th criminal defense attorney Benjamin Brafman who handled high-profile cases such as Michael Jackson, Jay-Z, P. Diddy, and Dominque Strauss-Kahn speaks out on CNN’s Piers Morgan.  Attorney states, Trayvon is a “horrible case” – There isn’t anything good about that case whatever happens to Mr. Zimmerman.  A kid who’s dead with parents going through their loss of a child and you can’t imagine that kind of grief.  I think this case plays out badly for America one way or the other, and I have a bad feeling about it.  There’s no happy results for anybody. “Stand Your Ground” is a terrible law.  It encourages vigilantism.  Creates these types of horrific tragedies.  So even if George Zimmerman is found “not guilty” it doesn’t mean what he did was good because what I think at the end of the day, what I’m frightened by to be honest with you as a citizen is the reaction of the public if he’s acquitted.  Based on the evidence from what I’ve seen to date there’s a strong possibility that he might be found not guilty.  It was a terrible mistake by the prosecutor to charge “murder.”  There were other crimes that might be more natural fits.”

New Interim Police Chief

On Tuesday, May 1st after an extensive search which began back in March, Sanford City Manager Norton Bonaparte announces new permanent police chief, Richard Meyers, a35-year-old veteran of law enforcement and former Chief of Police in Colorado Springs will be taking over for Capt. Darren Scott who served as interim Chief after Bill Lee’s resigning temporarily in the aftermath of Martin shooting .

George Zimmerman’s old Myspace Page “Legal Woes & Ex-Hoe”

Supposedly an old myspace page belonging to George Zimmerman has surfaced drawing scrutiny for some harsh remarks about Mexicans and a former lover.  There are Zimmerman’s old photos and two blogs dating back to August, 2005 referring to his past legal woes.  He also mentions leaving his native Manassas, Virginia by writing “I don’t miss driving around scared to hit mexicans walkin on the side of the street, wanna be thugs messin with peoples cars when they ain’t around (what are you provin’ that you can dent a car when no one is watchin) don’t make you a man in my book.  Workin 96 hours to get a pay check, gettin knives pulled on you by every Mexican you run into!”  George Zimmerman also makes reference to an “ex-hoe” possibly his “ex-financee’” who back in August, 2005 filed an injunction accusing him of domestic violence.  Zimmerman also addressed a “2005″ arrest outside a bar near the University of Florida where he was initially charged with felonies and accused of striking an alcohol and tobacco agent arresting his friend.  Zimmerman notes his charges were dropped to a “misdemeanor.”  The man knows he was wrong, but still got his hump (probably referring to lumps) Thanks to everyone, friends and fans, G baby you know you’re my rock!”  Zimmerman eventually completed a pre-trial intervention program and the misdemeanor was dropped.

Myspace page first resurfaced on websites and blogs including Mediatakeout.com and GlobalGrind.com which Zimmerman’s defense attorney, Mark O’Mara confirmed its legitimacy.  Mediatakeout says it “proves” Zimmerman is a “racist,” but Zimmerman’s attorney O’Mara says, “No it doesn’t” as Zimmerman is Hispanic, the son of a Peruvian woman.  His choice of words in the postings were “colorful” but not “horrible.”  Zimmerman used no “racial slurs” and the whole thing “has nothing to do with Martin case.  If Zimmerman’s “Internet presence” is going to be reviewed then it would logically follow Travyon’s and that would be problematic for the family.  Photos apparently belonging to Martin surfaced on Twitter and Twitpac showing the teen with tattoos, gold teeth and older than he was in many of the photos used by the media.

Double Standard “Stand her Ground” law in Florida

Marissa Alexander lived with an abusive husband who came after her.  He choked her and when she finally broke free, Marissa grabbed a gun and fired a single warning shot to the ceiling.  The judge denied Alexander immunity in a “Stand Your Ground” hearing after a jury found her guilty and now faces a mandatory sentence of 20 years in prison.  She’s got the same prosecutor, Angela Corey who is also charging George Zimmerman.  Zimmerman for allegedly pursuing and killing Trayvon Martin was allowed to walk free that evening while Alexander who fired a single shot has to spend 20 years of her life in prison.  Whose side do you take in this complex situation?  Those seeking justice for Trayvon Martin may have to side with prosecutor Angela Corey who denies Alexander and the NAACP’s plea for “Stand your Ground” ruling like the one afforded to George Zimmerman.  Is there a “Stand Your Ground Double Standard” when it comes to race between African-Americans and whites who are involved in these types of cases?  Alexander is heading to hear arguments for a retrial.  They’ll be no smile on her face if she loses the case.

Film “Neighborhood Watch” name change

With Trayvon Martin killing in the spotlight causing national controversy Fox Searchlight Pictures has changed its movie title from “Neighborhood Watch” to “The Watch” starring Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn as suburban watch volunteers who foil an alien plot to takeover Earth is scheduled to hit theaters sometime in July.

Zimmerman Arraignment

On Tuesday, May 8th Attorney O’Mara who did not attend arraignment waived his client’s appearance and filed a written not guilty plea for defendant Zimmerman on second-degree murder charge in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin.  In addition, Attorney O’Mara in two filings waived Zimmerman’s right to a speedy trial and said he needed more time to prepare his defense otherwise Zimmerman is guaranteed under Florida law the right to a trial within 175 days of his arrest.  Judge Kenneth R. Lester scheduled the court docket for August 8th at 8:30 a.m. when a trial date will be set unless defense requests a continuance in the case.  Assistant State Attorney Bernie de La Rionda did not appear in court on Tuesday.

“Trayvon Martin Hoodie Targets”

An unidentified online seller wanted to profit over Trayvon Martin tragedy so he designed paper targets to resemble dead Florida teenager.  The response was overwhelming and they sold out immediately.  Gun owners have been expressing their disgust as Trayvon does not deserve this kind of disrespect in his death.  Zimmerman’s attorney Mark O’Mara told the media targets represented “the highest level of disgust and the lowest level of civility.”  He’s worried about the impact these targets would have on the Martin family.  It’s “hate-mongering.”  That’s going to make it more difficult to try this case.

Doctors’ medical reports on Zimmerman and Martin

Accused murderer George Zimmerman who faces life in prison, three-page personal physician’s medical report diagnosed a “closed fracture” of his nose, black eyes, bruising to the upper lip and cheek, lower back pain, two lacerations to the back of his head nearly one-inch long and the other about a quarter-inch long occurring the evening after shooting Trayvon Martin during an alleged “life and death” struggle punching Zimmerman in the face then repeatedly bashing his head into the pavement.  It was only when Martin seemed to be reaching for the gun wedged in his waistband that Zimmerman drew his weapon and shot Trayvon in the chest killing  him.  Medical report further shows that Zimmerman declined hospitalization right after shooting and rejected the advise of his doctor for a follow-up appointment to see an ear, nose and throat physician.  Besides Zimmerman’s physical injuries, he complained of “occasional stress and nausea when thinking about the violence.”  He was not diagnosed with a concussion.  The doctor noted in his records that it was imperative Zimmerman “be seen by his psychologist for evaluation.”  Prior to the shooting Zimmerman’s doctor had prescribed Adderal and Temazepan medications that can cause side effects such as agitation and mood swings, but in fewer than 10 percent of patients.

Zimmerman’s claim is that he acted in “self-defense” because  he was being attacked while prosecutor contends Zimmerman instigated the confrontation by profiling Martin who was breaking no laws nor disturbing anyone as he was walking back to his father’s girlfriends’ home.  Trayvon Martin’s autopsy report shows cuts to his knuckles.

The day after shooting a neighbor who said he saw Zimmerman speaking to officers outside his home recalled seeing black eyes, significant swelling as well as bandages over his nose.

On the morning of February 27th, Zimmerman went to a Sanford, Florida physician’s office for treatment.  Doctor’s notes indicate that Zimmerman sought physician’s legal clearance for an appointment to return to his place of employment.

On May 14th, prosecutors released an 8-page collection of various documents referred to as discovery being examined by defense counsel who declined to comment as it is inappropriate.

Attorney O’Mara will review the vast amount of evidence on 67 CDs, a list of 22 witnesses naming 18 Sanford police officers, four FDLE investigators, three investigators from State Attorney’s office, Martin’s parents, Tracy Martin and Sybrina Fulton, Trayvon’s brother Jahvaris Fulton, Robert Zimmerman, Sr., his friend Joe Oliver and neighbor Joe Taaffe, photos, 911 recordings and other phone calls, crime-scene photos of both Zimmerman and the teen, Martin’s autopsy report, George Zimmerman’s vehicle in addition to video of Zimmerman’s questioning by police officers, new video evidence on the night of shooting from 7-Eleven store where Trayvon Martin reportedly purchased Skittles and Arizona iced tea to clubhouse in Retreat at Twin Lakes to townhouse complex where teen was shot and killed.

Newly Released Evidence on Martin and Zimmerman

Autopsy results show that Trayvon Martin had THC (intoxicant in marijuana) found in his system which was a very low amount and that he had a single gunshot wound through the heart at close range (16 inches away) It was too late to save Martin as bullet was enlarged in system.

George Zimmerman had a broken nose, bruises and bloody cuts to the back of his head with bleeding tenderness to his nose including a small laceration to the back of his head and that all injuries have minor bleeding on report written by Paramedic Michael Brandy.  Zimmerman refused to go to hospital and was not tested by Sanford police for alcohol or drugs.

FBI cannot determine if Zimmerman used racial slur or who is screaming on tape (Zimmerman or Martin)

Investigator Christopher Serino who played 911 tape for Trayvon’s father Tracy Martin in which screams for help were heard multiple times, if the voice was his son, clearly emotional said “no.”

George’s father Robert Zimmerman, Sr. who also listened to the recording told investigators on March 19th that it was his son yelling for help and is absolutely and positively George Zimmerman.  Robert Zimmerman said “He was not just yelling, he sounded like he was screaming for his life.”

© Copyright 2012

Created by Francke the Lyrical Yankee

Crimes in Rhyme

“Getting Away with Murder”

(Stay tuned for the latest crime news)

All Rights Reserved

]]> http://www.moodexpressions.com/wordpress/?feed=rss2&p=19277 0 http://www.moodexpressions.com/wordpress/?p=17715 http://www.moodexpressions.com/wordpress/?p=17715#comments Tue, 24 Jan 2012 18:54:13 +0000 sheila http://www.moodexpressions.com/wordpress/?p=17715

BEST ORIGINAL JOKES FOR YOUNG & OLD SCREWED UP FOLKS

“CLEAN & DIRTY RATINGS

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JESTERS POKE FUN AT ANYONE

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J.LO AND CASPER JOKES FOR “LATINO” FOLKS

How Smart can you be?  This time around Casper gets more than a car, he’s moved into J.Lo’s Hollywood Hills hacienda.  No screwin’ around Casper since Marc Anthony’s kids also live there.  Don’t take off your underwear!

It’s easy for Casper Smart to score.  He just pulls down his drawers and J.Lo promotes him from dancer to choreographer.

Britney making more dough as a judge on a Reality Show than J.Lo.  Watch out “American Idol” when it’s time for a new contract Jennifer is no pushover.  She knows how to “wheel-and-deal” her fingers around Casper’s hot weiner.

For Casper’s “25th” birthday Jennifer brought him a Dodge Ram pickup truck.  That’s what he gets for a good f**k?  Casper is a cute “smart” guy.  He should have been riding in style with a Mercedes, Ferrari or Porsche.  J.Lo you’re a  “jeep Latino.”

Poor Marc Anthony fell at the wayside as Casper knew how to pull J.Lo’s strings and her “private things.”

JENNIFER ANISTON BITCHY JOKES FOR “COCKY” FOLKS

Jennifer has just picked up some pet chickens besides the rooster living with her.  Will she eat the chicks or the cock?  Probably mix up a dish of cock flavored soup since it would be a lot tastier than chicken stock.

Jen seems to be happy for Angela Jolie and Brad Pitt on their engagement, but not when they got together for “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” when she was still married to Pitt.   Jennifer thought it was so “uncool.”  In other words, why did this f**king bitch make her look like a “fool?”

Aniston let Justin know she’ll never theroux his love aside.  He’ll always be her guy, but what happens if Justin turns into Brad Pitt?  Will Jennifer cut off his dick?

Jen and Justin don’t seem to care “Wanderlust” sucks as long as they can f**k.

RUSSELL BRAND “LIMEY” JOKES FOR AMERICAN FOLKS

Russell Brand performing at Borgata’s Resort in Atlantic City was interrupted by this heckler screaming “Katy Perry!”  What’s a limey to do, but take this obnoxious man to the cleaners jokingly.  Russell gave this twit his “quick wit.”  If I couldn’t keep her what makes you think you can rude unattractive man.  Perhaps the combination of alcohol and foolish behavior has gotten you into this reckless condition.

Looks like Russell has found a new sleeping beauty to replace Katy.  It’s Anouska De Georgiou (can you pronounce it?) “The Hoff and Jared Leto’s ex-dame igniting her flame.  Anouska is a good match for Russell as she’s got a fiery personality.  Hey, she’s sure to light his engine!!

KATY PERRY JOKES FOR “LESBIANS” AND “STRAIGHT” FOLKS

Who tapped Katy’s “spaghetti strap” on the red carpet nearly popping one of her sexy assets?  No! That’s the “Part of Me” I don’t want the guys to see.  Sorry Katy!

Katy Perry turns herself into a female gladiator for “E.T. movie.  With gold-breast plate and fencing sword in hand she dares any man to touch her “can.”  When in Rome do as the Romans do “rule and screw.”

Way to go Katy with your new 22-year-old French beau, the world’s highest paying model.  Smitten by Katy the kitten.  It’s time for some French kissin.

Go Katy!  Giving “Part of Me” to charity.  Upper or bottom half?  My parts are scarce.

Katy says she still loves her man and will always stand behind Russell’s brand.  Well Katy, Russell’s mighty hand landed him in the can.  Will you take the witness stand?

Take “Part of Me” flashy see-through skirt and sexy underwear in Paree’  We can certainly see why Katy wanted snatch to match her blue head of hair.  Single and looking for a good screw!

Be a “Part of Me.”  As Katy’s eyes are always on the ladies she’s promoting her new electric blue false lash collection hoping the cosmetic line will attract Lesbians.

Katy Perry lands hard-core prison guard role as “Rikki.”  She’s gotta love this part being in charge of bad ladies. Here Kitty, Kitty, Kitty!

Perry sang “Part of Me” at the Grammy’s probably referring to ex-hubby, but Russell never had intentions of sharing her with lesbians.  Sorry Katy!

“Hot N Cold” Limey Russell and Katy didn’t hit it off and got divorced.  Russell knew Katy kissed a girl and liked it.  Then he found out his wife was a dike.  What’s a girl to do when two horny lesbians are groping and licking you?

PARIS HILTON JOKES FOR “SEXY” FOLKS

Mad Men’s Jon Hamm (H.A.M.) and other celebrities referring to Hilton’s “stupidity” boils down to nothing but sheer jealousy.  Paris is no dummy when it comes to making money, stripping and showing her tits.  That’s why every guy’s wish is to have “One Night in Paris.”

Once upon a time “Stars are Blind.”  Now this rich bitch is looking for a comeback with an “old” video “Drunk Text” a sex-sting ridiculous mess.  Paris you’re the best when “wet and naked.”  We thought this was a new video, but your rep says no it was recorded over a year ago.  Somehow it was leaked and we’ll let everyone know when her first single will be released.  Who knew we were being screwed!

Paris is no dummy!  She just won a barrel of money on her “31st” birthday.  Why should anyone want to pick on this rich hot chick? Paris didn’t have to play Craps when she had the skill to win $30,000 in Blackjack.  Now Ms. Hilton wants to change “Sin City” to “Wynn City.”  What a pity for the hoes that are looking to make dough.

Paris says she’s going to make another video, but do we want to listen to her “canary singing?”  Maybe it’s time for Paris to go back to “The Simple Life.”

Here’s the perfect shoe to attract a good screw.  Paris’ “Sweetie Hump Pumps.”

Paris says she prefers an “ugly man” over one that’s handsome.  So all this bare heiress needs to do is close her eyes and let a good lover get under the covers?

Paris Hilton is a real dummy.  That’s a fact!  She’s in “Madame Tussaud’s House of Wax.”

Send Miz Paris to speak at the United Nations.  She would improve our sexual relations.  Then Iran would be putty in our hands.

KIM KARDASHIAN “RAW”JOKES FOR MUTT & JEFF FOLKS

Was Jeff too rough on mutt?  Did Kris insult Kim about her big butt?  Maybe Kim ditched Kris for not enough “dick” or was she too short to reach it?  Kris might have been a “dickhead” ’cause he couldn’t hump in bed.  Potato head too slow for hot tomato?

Kim should have everything like the 20.5 carat diamond ring,  The wedding gifts she could split with her rich Reality TV family.  Thank God for prenups so you can keep the good stuff.  Kris Humphries is pissed off at Kim and wants an annulment.  He has good cause to claim their marriage was a fraud.  Kim would not agree to counseling as she would now make a barrel of money with “E” who filmed the wedding.  Kim says this is not true as she wanted the marriage to last forever, but just couldn’t go through more than 72 days living with Kris.  Rumors have it that Kim was profiting a cool $17 million from “E.”  Kim, Kim quite contrary doesn’t know how to treat her men fairly as now Kris’ attorney is suing “E” and for dubbing him on Reality TV.

MR. HUMPHRIES PAY MY LEGAL FEES

Hey Kris you’re not getting away with this.  You’re gonna be screwed if you lose.  Kim’s attorney is coming after you!!!!

Kardashian gets into suing badass mood over news picture of tennis star, Serena Williams’ ass.  Kim says it matches her ass and she’s not going to let this pass.

Is Kim a schmo for not knowing how to use her iphone?  Oh dear! Is that why “sext text” messages appear?

The fun is over for viewers are tired of looking at Kris “dubbing” reruns.  He’d better keep his lips buttoned after signing that prenup ’cause Kim is not taking any shit.

KIM’S WEDDING MONEY GOES TO CHARITY

Yes, Kim did the right thing by cutting a check and doubling money to “Dream Foundation” charity, but she ain’t fooling anybody.  Kim could afford to give away gift money or it would go to another man like “Uncle Sam. ”

KIM’S “HOT JOCK” FROCK

Kim lightens up the day with her new long curly waves.  Spotted in a sexy frock with her luscious boobs looks like she’s on the prowl for a hot jock.  Rumors say she’s dating another “NFL” athlete who may be advertising for “Jockeys.”  Perhaps Kim would have a better chance with a guy who plays hockey.

“Movin’ Out” after stalker tried to get into Kim’s house.  T’wat’s a girl to do when all the nuts are after you?  Get into a ritzy secured gated community just like Dipsy Lindsay.

Yeah!  “Last Woman Standing”

Kim a “Surrogate” for her sister?  From a bad marriage to a baby carriage.  She’ll definitely sign a contract before she gets tapped.

32-year-old Kim has crush on 24-year-old Tim.  Since QB Broncos Tim Tebow reportedly still a virgin, Kim should be looking for Dick.

Spotted having a lunch date at Beverly Hilton Hotel rekindling an old flame NFL player Reggie “no pain” in the Bush with Kim the Tush.  Now what’s that other guy’s name?

R&B singer Ray J and “KK” who was his sex partner dishes out the shit in his new book, “Death of a Cheating Man” and former flame relationship.  Their wild chemistry grew night after night with a good screw.  If it’s Kardashian she denies sleeping with him while still married to music producer, Damon Thomas.  Will Kim sue Ray J, but after all anyone could be “KK?”

KRISIS! HUMP NEEDS MONEY

Kris Humphries suing Kim for $7 million.  He says they had a joint bank account, but Kardashian didn’t give him ATM card.

CELEBRITIES SLAM KIM KARDASHIAN

Actors whose names end in “HAM” are not fans of Kardashian.

Kim Kardashian responds to Mad Men’s Jon Hamm.  I may be “stupid” but I’m no f**king “idiot.

British action-movie hunk Jason Statham says he does not consider himself a brand or superfan of Kim Kardashian’s brand.  Well here’s a guy who doesn’t want to attack you in the sack.

KIM SCORES BIG WITH HAMM FAN

Hamm’s opinion of Kim after meeting her on “30 Rock” alongside Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin.  Hamm says, “Stupidity is a valuable commodity in this industry.”  Maybe Kim will consider a cameo as a “Silly Woman” on “Mad Men” so Hamm can get a “piece” of the action.

KIMYE & KANYE DRESS ALIKE IN “BLACK & WHITE”

Is Hollywood dream couple dressing alike preparing for nuptials?  How about Kimye and Kanye “black & white” koordinated baby invitations.

KIM & KANYE DINING AT MEATPACKING DISTRICT IN NYC

It’s the perfect place to eat a “sweet piece of meat.”

KIM’S POLITICAL SCHTICK

I’d like to run for “Mayor of Glendale” if I could only stay in office for more than 72 days.  This would give me plenty of time to land a nice Armenian city council man.

KIMMY’S MIDDY

Gimme, Gimme Kimmy’s Titties!  Kimmy’s huge titties stick out of her middy.

KANYE KEEPING UP WITH KIMMY

Looks like “E” has signed up Kanye to join “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” but they’ll be no “sex swing” action.  Kanye only has eyes for Kimmy so watch out guys don’t step out of line!

KIMMY GETS HICKEY!

Feast for Easter!  Kim was scene leaving Kanye’s apartment with a hickey after he inserted his dickey.

KANYE THINKS KIMMY IS YUMMY!

Kanye West was seen rekindling his love for Kim in NYC.  He’s been trying long and hard to get a piece of that Kardashian.  They were at the “Hunger Games” where he munched on her like a tasty snack.  Kim didn’t mind getting attack.

KANYE’S “SICK” REMEDY!

What’s with Kanye lately naming a song from cold remedy “Theraflu” after his enemies?  Kanye made a bad move when he tried to degrade Taylor Swift and had to be removed.  The cold company may use their own remedy by suing.  Kanye West’s Theraflu explicit lyrics express his love for girlfriend Kim and at the same time “rubs ex-husband Kris’ nose in it.”

KIM’S RACY PHOTO

Wouldn’t you like to take a peek and see what’s beneath the sheets?  It’ll cost you a pretty penny.

FLOUR-POWDER BOMB GONE SOUR

Kim says take this PETA flour-powder girl — “Hey bub tell it to the judge.”

MAD “DASH” FASHION

Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Dash Clothing and Accessories for women that need to dress sexy.  Millionaire shoppes in LA, Vegas and Miami, but for those who can only afford our cheap clothes there’s bargains galore at the Sears stores.

KHLOE KARDASHIAN “HE RUBBED ME THE WRONG WAY”

Khloe says when she first met Kris Humphries “He rubbed her the wrong.” Suppose Kris rubbed Khloe the right way.  Let’s say she asks Kris to come over and go for a ride on her “sex swing” since hubby, Lamar Odom has had so many personal problems lately Kris would be the perfect fit for Khloe who seems to be a sex addict.

KRIS JENNER “LADY LUBE” IN A TUBE

Kris Jenner roles are getting better and better.  She not only likes this, but tried it.  Kris signed up as spokeswoman for over-the-counter “Zestra Essential Arousing Oils” a product that’s supposed to enhance a woman’s pleasure by intensifying sensitivity to touch.  Is Bruce not pleasing his lady?

RIHANNA “BANANA” JOKES FOR SCREWING FOLKS

Rihanna”Where Have You Been?” Playing a weapons specialist Navy Cadet fighting aliens in “Battleship” – That’s why it’s great to be back on this planet.  I’ve had enough “alien sex.”

Rihanna bi-sexual?  She doesn’t care which way she’s screwed!

Ashton asks Rihanna “Kutcher, would ya?”

RiRi doesn’t know what to do with herself as she has so many tattoos.  Maybe “We Found Love” singer will return to favorite NYC Bang Bang Tattoo Parlor for Chris’ “prick” on middle finger.

Rihanna goes “topless” but we can’t see her chachkas.

Now we can see RiRi’s “titties” as she exits an Italian eatery in NYC wearing see-through netting.  Breasts are no longer sacred.

Go singer-gangster lady copying Pfeiffer’s “Scarface” clothes at the Grammys.  I’m sexy and I know it!

Did you happen to catch RIRI’s new blonde shaggy hairstyle as she walked out of the Roxbury Nightclub wearing a “Stella McCartney” striped sweater, short-ripped Levis and high-heel black booties right up to her snatch?  RIRI you gotta hottie body.

Chris Brown once “hit on” Rihanna, but now Brown better watch out since Rihanna got “Thug Life” knuckle tattoos she could bruise you.

Rihanna smokes pot in Hawaii while some guy tries to get her hot by slipping in his c – – k.

Talk that dirty talk or take a walk ’cause all I want to do is screw around with you.

Did we really find love now that I found out you’re a thug?  I wanted a honey, but you tried to get my money.

Rihanna dresses up as a slut in a Halloween costume as goonies try to pull off her bloomies.

Singer tells farmer there’s nothing wrong with her going topless ’cause she’s “Black Irish.”  That’s when Irish man gives O’Rihanna “lay of the land.”

Rihanna dumps this punk ’cause he don’t know how to hump.

This guy wants Rihanna to eat his banana, but she already ate her boyfriend’s grapes.

Cheers – Here’s to all the queers!  Don’t let anybody get you down.  Turn the world around.  Life is too damn short to be wearing a frown.  There’s a party in town.  Let’s drink to another round.  Who gives a screw that you’re freakin’ cool.

S&M – Sadistic and masochistic when tying up and whipping men are definitely not Rihanna’s boyfriends.  Sexy singer dresses up like a whore while dancing and sucking on bananas loving and hating dicks and pricks that torture her with chains and whips.

Rude Boy – Your dick is not big enough to fool around with my girly toys.

Hard – Ah yeah yeah yeah!  It felt like a piece of lard your “hard-on.”  You’re probably a Don Juan or perhaps a stupid man.  If you cause me pain – Stuff your brains down the drain.  No, I’m not insane.  This dame is no cock game.

Unfaithful – Rihanna lost her virginity when he broke her cherry.  Now this guy is on his merry way looking for another lay.

So now you “Take a Bow” ugly cow after screwing me.  You’re the one to be pitied.  Don’t apologize wise guy for your f – – king lies.  I’m dating Joe who enjoys a good blow.  Asshole go cry and moan.

(Out of Rehab) Good Girl Gone Bad – Got f – – ked up by this cad.

I live in “Disturbia” suburbia where creeps walk the streets.  Was hurt by this jerk as he attacked me.  Stripped off my clothes and inserted his hose.  No one knows the pain I feel.  The whole ordeal was unreal.  Then this heel was caught robbing a bank when he slipped on a banana peel.

Man Down – Sucking me like a hound.  His sperm is on my hairy mound.

BIEBER “JOHNSON PLEASER” JOKES FOR HOT FOLKS

This is what happens when you turn eighteen.  Bieber creams in his jeans as thousands of teens scream.

Justin keeps fit eating healthy “Subway” sandwiches.  He asked Selena if she’d like to take a bite out of his submarine.   She replied, “I’d love to eat your sub.”

How did Justin get so “bloody?”  Selena caught him cheating.

Justin and Selena are going fishing or should we say “dicking?”

What more can the “18th Birthday” boy ask for?  Kiss and squeeze Selena or now you’re old enough Bieber to slip in your weiner.

Action, Lights, Camera!  “Proactive” – Justin interviewing girls with pimples?  So what’s next for Bieber – Interviewing women with wrinkles?

Is Justin trying to prove that he’s a holy roller with his new “Jesus” tattoo so Selena can count on not getting screwed?

When the girls were asked would you have recognized Justin on Venice Beach wearing a gold mask?  They all replied, “Yes ’cause he’s got a nice ass.”  Girls wouldn’t mind grabbing his behind.

Girl looks for loot from paternity suit.  Baby, Baby!  Bieber never pulled down his underwear to have an affair with Yeater.  Crazy lady that ain’t my baby.  DNA will prove I never screwed you.  Nutty Mariah Yeater does an about face and dismisses the case, but will Bieber sue her for telling everyone he took off her bloomers?

Justin gets on the scene for Halloween in a nude costume with a broom.  The chicks get witchy trying to touch his dicky-do.

The girls were wishin’ Justin ripped off his clothes “Under the Mistletoe” then they would tie him to a pole and blow his hose.

Bieber the little teaser wants Selena to squeeze his wiener.  Selena said she would pull his pole if he took off his clothes.

Bieber’s pet snake is not fake.  He’s always wanted Selena to rub his teenie-weenie Johnson so he takes it out of his pants pocket on the Black Carpet.

Mr. Johnson may be small, but he’s gonna grow 4 feet tall.

Selena smiles as she looks at the creepy reptile, but still gets a kick licking Justin’s boa constrictor prick.

Britney says hello to pale orange fellow, but couldn’t let go.  She enjoyed pulling his hose.

MDNA/MINAJ/M.I.A. JOKES FOR “HARD-ON” FOLKS

COME GET YOUR TOY BOYS

“Cougar on the Lose”  Bad girl gone wild looking for young males.  Oh God, I’d rather sin and give in.  Don’t care about the pain of hell as long as I  feel swell.  Like to misbehave night and day.  Love to act this way.  I’m hungry for sex and fun.  Gotta hot and erotic body.  Does anyone wanna Madonna?

ANDERSON COOPER MIDDLE FINGER

British Rapper M.I.A. bad girl controversy with CNN’s Anderson Cooper “sticking up middle finger.”  Cooper says he never said or did anything.  M.I.A. responding to problem.  Disagree as M.I.A. still waiting for intimate encounter with Cooper sticking up finger.

Some of Minaj’s songs are so awful they should be “locked up” in her garage.

Nicki will you be my Easter bunny so I could lick your pink cotton candy?

Before she was famous Nicki Minaj’s first outfits came from the women’s jail at a garage sale.  That’s how the rapper got labeled a “hoe” from the jail clothes.

Madonna – Wants her desperately!  Still claiming to get off with women to promote new single – This time kissing Nicki – Next time licking Nicki.

MDNA touring in Tel Aviv sees Madonna ordering “kosher” groceries.  She’s all prepared to abide by any Jewish rules including covering her hair.

Madonna may be sued for plagiarism “Give me all your Luvin” over Brazilian producer’s “Love Banana.”  I’d give my luvin’ any day for this guy’s banana.

What a girl needs “Like a Prayer” for Madonna has gotta be scared while on tour in Israel that Iran might strike a nuclear war.  Madonna’s concert “bombed.”  Actually Madonna was heading to Syria, but there they really kill ya.

Nicki releases new single “Starships.”  She needs to go to another planet.

Minaj staged a “Roman Holiday” exorcism ceremony which was an outrage.  Dressed like “Little Red Riding Hood” was the rapper misunderstood?  You have every right to express your opinion on religion.  Of course some people felt you were tacky while others believe you’re wacky.

Nicki goes from “Stupid Hoe” to “Sacrilegious Dish” wearing red habit outfit matching Grammy’s carpet with some mopey guy dressed up as “The Pope.”  Holy Rapper makes more dough than hoe.

Nicki Minaj maybe a “Stupid Hoe” but is she a role model for “hoes?”

Rapper Nicki “Bitchy” Minajesty on Madonna’s halftime team demanding some basics like plain old lickin’ fried chicken, Martinelli apple juice, packs of gum, Dasani water and a whole bunch of everyday foods to be brought into her Super Bowl dressing room.  As a side dish she would love to order a “boy toy.”  That seems easy enough to get if you’re looking for sex.  Just make sure this is in your entertainment clause.

M.I.A. (Missing Intelligence Action) Madonna is pissed at Brit singer giving millions of Super Bowl fans a zinger by sticking up her trigger middle-finger.  NBC who was caught off guard to “bleep it” apologized for the vulgarity.  Guest rapper thought it was appropriate shit and a lot of stiff dicks must of liked it.

Who would know Icon Madonna is 53 years old.  Fans couldn’t wait to see her perform at the “Super Bowl.”  You could say she looks “Like a Virgin” flexing those biceps, but Madonna would rather be a “Girl Gone Wild.”

Madonna prepared a week before the Super Bowl installing a hydraulic Yoga Mat and getting an exercise expert while she stayed at the Marriott Hotel.  “Like a Prayer” heaven help me I’m going to lip-synch and dance my way onto the stage.  This is what happens when you’re old and gray.  Of course Madonna doesn’t have to worry about it ’cause she has a professional costume and makeup artist.

Tag Madge Touchdown!  Athletes would love to take a peek at Madonna’s cheeks and maybe her pee pee, but they might not get a chance since her clothes are so tight.

Was it wrong that Madonna won an award for “Masterpiece” and Elton John’s “Hello, Hello” did not win for best original song?  If Sir Elton thought Madonna didn’t have a “fucking” chance why do guys want to get into Madonna’s pants?

Ricky Gervais picks on Madonna “You’re just like a a virgin” at Golden Globes so she tells him “Why don’t you do something about it?”  Ricky wished he could stick in his dicky.  The British slapstick artist couldn’t match Madge’s bitchy wit.  That’s why Madonna is so rich.

Wealthy Madonna says Gaga’s “Born this Way” is reductive to her “Express Yourself.”  Music nor lyrics sound the same.  Madonna, you’ve been too long on the gravy train.  You’re the “Material Girl” but Lady Gaga is “Mama Monster” who grew to fame ’cause she’s a smart dame.

GAGA JUICY JOKES FOR “HORNY” FOLKS

How come South Korea banning Gaga’s concert because of her “”lewd lyrics” when most of them can’t understand “English?”

After Gaga and her “Monster Mother” give Oprah an interview the Lady says she will be operating “incognito.”  There’s simply no need to hide your identity with the media as no one would ever recognize you looking natural.  No hair, no makeup, no eyebrows, no clothes.

Gaga’s new look “Flesh Coloured Facial Horns.”  This is what happens when you fire your makeup artist.

Last year’s Grammy rage was Gaga getting out of an egg on stage.  Now Gaga is caught up in Grammy drama dressed in fishnet.  This time she can’t outdo Nicki Minaj’s religious digs since Rapper hired Gaga’s fired creative director.  This is what you get from hiring her former assistant “lousy outfit.”

Goo-Goo Licious! Gaga scores a touchdown celebrating an early Super Bowl for a photo shoot with just a football hiding her boobies.  We dig a natural Gaga with no wig, but who wouldn’t like to see her titties.

On New Year’s Eve Mayor Bloomberg told Lady Gaga if she’s a good girl he’ll take her to City Hall to look at his balls.

Poor Gaga has to “Marry the Night” because her “knight in shining armor” fell into a city sewer running after a whore.

Goo-Goo Gaga slips into Turkey costume, but there’s no room for her boobs so she makes a slit for her tits.

Lady Gaga all dressed up for Halloween as Marilyn Monroe hoping Bill Clinton will get horny, but Bill fooled around long enough with his horn.

Gaga’s pumpkins turn into munchkins.

Guys would love to see Gaga’s boobies in 3D.

Nude fella gets into trouble poking tote bubble umbrella to grope Gaga in her black widow raincoat.  Police told him next time put on some clothes.

What’s Gaga’s passion?  Her relish for raw hot dogs.

Lady Gaga breaks up with boyfriend ’cause he had small balls.

Gaga goes broke after choking on coke.  Then she elopes with some dope that’s a joke.

Gaga tongues boyfriend’s shlong after a game of ping-pong.

Does weird Gaga “The Queen” have wet dreams?  That’s why she wears diapers.

Mother Monster gives her fans a delicious treat showing them how she eats with only two buck teeth.

Guys give Gaga a “hard time” while she grinds.

Gaga’s Halloween dare – Who wants to tear off her scarecrow clothes?

What’s Lady Gaga’s favorite hot cocktail?  “Cock on the Rocks.”

Gaga was caught humping at the gas pump.  After that she got “car jocked.”

Lately Gaga gets a thrill playing with her nipples.

Gaga has animal sex in her leopard dress.

Ashes to ashes and dust to dust.what’s Gaga without a bust?  A “pizza crust.”

Gaga is “dick-whipped.”

Gaga’s hot box is locked into “You and I” music video with criminal bad boy toy co-star Vampire actor, Taylor Kinney who obviously has a bigger wiener than on-and-off boyfriend, Luc Carl that used to screw her when she was in the mood for this dude.

Shady Lady would rather be f – - ked by Vampire actor than sucked.

Lady Gaga is no copycat.  She’s only following Madonna’s act.

Gaga just doesn’t play the piano she also blows Jo’s horns from evening till dawn.

Guys tease Gaga over size of pepe so she invites them into her tepee.

This Italiano dish proves she can also be a prick.  Gaga gets all “dicked” out with a prosthetic penis as a manly greasy-haired Jo Calderone ’cause Mother Monster wants her fans to know she’s not like other “ass holes.”  Hey I may look this way, but I’m still a babe.

Have fun with Gaga’s buns.

Guys jump on stage and pull off Gaga’s panties showing her bare booty.  Instead of Gaga getting upset she decides to shake her ass performing dirty “Earthquake” dance.

This lady doesn’t need a pair of balls to deck the walls for Christmas at Barney’s Luxurious Clothing Store.  She’s gonna lure customers in a cute suit to the window display with”Gaga’s Hot Santa Workshop” in just a g-string around her hiney.  For a delicious added holiday treat Gaga will lick your peppermint sticks.

Lady Gaga’s weird fantasy are not pasties.  The “Monster Queen of Fairies” has inked horny unicorn tattoos on her nipples.  Does Gaga wish she was “Born this Way” or is she looking for a gay lay?

Gaga endorses “Fruit of the Loom” for gay grooms.

Gaga’s boyfriend eats her “raw meat bikini” while she sucks on his “teenie-weenie.”

This guy grabs Gaga’s blonde ponytail hoping to get nailed.  Gaga lands on her ass passing gas.  Fans rush out of the stands as someone pulled stink bomb alarm.  Concert closes due to foul odor.

Nude Mermaid GaGa in the sea of love flapping her fins for a piece of tail, but this time the shady lady transforms into a male.  It’s Gaga with a prick in “You and I” lyrics.

Guys are suckers when it comes to Gaga breast-feeding dolly.

Have you seen Little Old Lady Gaga’s shriveled up body in a wheelchair?  The pop superstar has become her little monster’s worst nightmare.  Lady Gaga gets weirder by the minute as this spring chicken comes on stage looking’ old and gray fans throw rotten eggs.  The only thing this crazy dame had to say, “Just wanted to show my fans that in my old age I can still give a good lay.”

Gaga gets hosed in her condom clothes.

Shady Lady is in town pussy footin’ around.

Goo-Goo Gaga’s wacky Beehive hat gets attacked by a swarm of bees as she gets trapped in toilet stall taking a crap.

Double Trouble – Gaga takes to the stage as her fake bubble dress deflates.  Little Monsters grab her cheeky tussy, sponge-rubber falsies and shaved pussy.  Goo-Goo Gaga says who cares I’m promoting my condom underwear.

Lady Gaga will celebrate the 4th of July with a bang.

Shady Lady in Times Square wearing no underwear shows rear end to boyfriend.

Gaga’s boyfriend gives her the finger – She creams in her skinny jeans.

Does Shady Lady have “sticky fingers?”  Japan wristband scam could land her fanny in the can.  Rich bitch goddess says she’s honest not a con artist.  “Poker Face” play it straight.  “Little Monsters” don’t like getting screwed by shipping rules.

Gaga had alien sex in her orbit dress.

Dick flags a ride for Gaga’s pussy wagon.

Gaga’s dreadlocks got caught in boyfriend’s cock.

True “Edge of Glory” Fire Escape Story – This is really the tenement where Gaga lives.  The reason apartment building and streets are empty is that people got scared by Gaga running up and down fire escapes in her wild get-up and crazy hairdo they moved.  “Edge of Glory” screwy tenement story.

Lady Gaga says new song “Hair” is now the answer to her prayer. While on European tour British audience stares as Gaga removes turquoise wig showing a “skinhead.”  If this is not a plastic cap does bald head match her snatch?

Did you know Gaga got screwed with her penis shoe?

Did you ever notice that Gaga has the same frown whether she’s standing or upside down?  Baby, I was “Born this Way.”

Lady Gaga says she is a religious person who would never hurt the church.  So why does “Judas” video show Gaga as a Mary Magdalene biker chick in a motorcycle brigade looking to get laid?

Gaga enjoys playing with bunny boy toys.  She can’t wait to get on top of “HOP.”

Lady Gaga is suing “Baby Gaga Breast Milk Ice Cream” because she’s thinking of opening up her own breast milk factory.

Gaga changes her mind opening a breast milk factory as she doesn’t have milk-secreting titties.

Gaga looks good enough to eat.  Why not make her your bunny treat?

Chilly & Thrilling!  Gaga in the raw covering her nips with a skateboard.  The broad with class has a cute ass.

What happens when you mix Gaga with lava?  “Hot Mama.”

Yoga and Whiskey keeps Gaga frisky.

Gaga’s screwy getup – Her latex dress made out of condoms.

Guess what Lady Gaga was doing inside that eggshell – Playing with herself.

Ga-Ga’s Gingerbread House raises lots of dough.

The guys can’t wait to take a bite out of Gaga’s mushy cookies.

What is Gaga’s passion fruit?  Eating Mouth-Watering Bananas.

Lady Gaga’s hot boyfriend wants to know if his sample is large enough.

Gaga’s boyfriend asks her if she likes “Valentine Pink Malted Balls.”  How did you know I love sucking on balls?

There’s a way to play with Lady Gaga – Take off her clothes from head-to-toe.  Poker-face.  The sensational goo-goo doll is inflatable.  It does all kinds of tricks.   You can suck her “t – ts” while she takes a ride on your disco stick.

Gaga’s favorite Valentine treat.  Boyfriend’s sweet stuff “buttery nuts.”

Pussy lady is bisexual, but true love is Dick ’cause he gotta big p r – -k.

Gaga sings “Auld Lang Syne” as she starts her new year with a bang.

Gaga’s new year’s resolution for 2011 – to give the men a better screw than she did in 2010.

‘Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house not a creature was stirring not even a mouse only Santa laying Gaga on the couch.

Lady Gaga got “cold feet” when she tried to pole dance on Santa’s beat.

Gaga has the best raw meat in town – That’s why Santa hangs around.

Shrewd Scrooge tried to screw Gaga, but Santa already nailed her.

Lady Gaga could have been “Mrs. Focker” but she’d rather be Santa’s bunny.

Gaga invites Santa to sample her tasty “hot cross buns.” Santa loves  having fun eating your sweet buns.

Why didn’t Santa come when Gaga was ready?  Santa’s suit has no zipper.

Santa calls out for Gaga – Ho! Ho! Ho! – Where did my ho go?

Gaga tells Santa she lost her marbles.  Don’t worry Gaga – You can play with Santa’s balls as you deck my halls.

Jolly Santa asks Gaga if she’d like a buck.  Gaga replies, “I don’t f -  – k.”

Santa gets his “cookies off” – He plays with Gaga in his sleigh.

Shady Lady gives Santa the “cold shoulder.”

Gaga tells merry elves – “You can play with me.”  Elves are so happy.

Santa gives Gaga a snow job.

Gaga gives Santa a blow job.

Lady Gaga loves Santa’s decorated balls.

Santa’s beard tickles Gaga’s pussy.

Gaga visits Santa at the cold North Pole.  He invites her into his hot workshop for Schnapps and a sample of his tasty nuts.

Gaga goes goo-goo over Santa’s hot sausages.

Santa gets a kick when Gaga licks his candy stick.

Gaga makes Santa potato latkes while she plays with his chachka.

Has anyone seen GaGa’s “Hanukkah Bush?”  No! I’ve only seen her furry tree.

Shady Pussy Lady’s Christmas wish – “Deck the Halls with Balls”

GaGa is the breast piece in the world!

Lady Gaga’s favorite Thanksgiving dish was munching on yummy turkey balls.  She now prefers tasty butterballs.

GaGa will dress up for Halloween in a “Dominatrix” witch outfit for dick whipping.

Vampire Thrilling Horror –  Gaga’s blood sucked after vampire f – – k.

Gaga is no dummy – She owns a smartphone.

Where’s the beef?  Franc Fernandez designer of Lady Gaga’s crazy meaty getup says it went through the meat grinder.

Gaga’s rah meat grotesque dress offended a Rabbi who said it’s not from the “kosher butcher.”

A priest thinks Gaga’s meat dress was neat.

Have you seen Gaga’s pretty tussy?  No, but I’ve seen her pretty pussy.

Gaga’s monster pals experience the All-American “hands-on” gal.

You can buy GaGa “condom sausages” for guys in different sizes.

Ooh-La-La Gaga would bend over backwards for her “little monsters.”

Goo-Goo Gaga exposes her breasts on boob tube.

You can play with Gaga’s pumpkins anytime.

Gaga doesn’t mind when the boys give her a “hard” time.

A “little monster” fan kept abreast of Gaga.

Lady Gaga sure has a pair of balls – She dresses manly then shows her fanny.

Gaga’s boyfriend screws up.  He prefers sluts.

Gaga was Alejandro’s ho in Mexico.

Roberto and Fernando didn’t give a “f – – k” about Lady Luck.

Lady Gaga had an orgy with Alejandro, Roberto and Fernando.

The lady loves Dick’s shtick.

Gaga sat on his jock and got him hot.

This blonde chick likes to ride his disco stick.

Gaga likes a cool whip when she strips.

Dick got into Gaga’s box.

Gaga flips over Dick.

Dick sucks Gaga’s lollipop.

Gaga has a fit over a stiff dick.

Paparazzi shoots Gaga’s pretty pussy.

Gaga thinks Hitler’s dad was a papa nazi..

Guys like Gaga’s sweet rah meat.

Gaga loves to eat hot Italian sausages and tasty German wiener schnitzel.

What gets Lady Gaga mad?  When she’s had a “f – -ked up” cad.

Bought a Lady Gaga doll so I can “Poker Face” and spray her with mace.

How did Lady Gaga get her name?  Guys thought she was a crazy lady.

Why did Gaga break up with her boyfriend Speedy?  She was surprised when he turned out to be a “slow-moving” guy.

Gaga loved her new boyfriend Luc ’cause he’s never in a “f – – ked” up mood.

WEINER JOKES FOR “COCKY KOSHER” FOLKS

Weiner’s “text sex pal” coming out with whoopee tell-it-all book.  Did Weiner feel trapped not being able to have sex with his Muslim pregnant wife that he had to resort to a life of “text undressed sex?”  And is his peck included in the text?

Will NY Congressman “Weiner” be subpoenaed?

Photo of cock with hand on crotch – Pop goes the weiner in jockey boxers.  Congressman says his weiner is much leaner.  Facebook and Twitter girls go nuts for weiner.  Congressman admits it’s his “p r _ _ k.”
Weinerschnitzel in a pickle.  Customers rush to Queens deli for a tasty “piggy in the blanket.”  Wife loves to eat her “kosher” weiner.

Weiner is a phony full of baloney.  New twist after explicit naked pics of Congressman Anthony Weiner’s p r – – k.   He’s decided to get help from a psychiatrist.   Question is whether or not this “sick p – – -k” will be able to continue as a representative of the Brooklyn-Queens dickstrict after he had a hard on for porn star, Ginger Lee sending “100″ sex emails to nail her.  Weiner’s letter of resignation to his fellow congressmen apologizes for dick.

Tweet this or lick this?  Connecticut toy company cashing in on weiner. Girls and boys can take off doll’s clothes and play with weiner.  Porn publisher, Larry Flynt offers job to ex-congressman to write hard-core sex articles which he turns down as his wife is coming out with a book titled, “What I like about Kosher Weiner.”  CNN may be putting on a new show calling it Spitzer Hot Weiner “In The Arena.”  Since “Client #9″ was fired as his ratings for the show were low, Weiner decided to get a “blow job.”

ARNOLD “X-RATED” SCHWARZENEGGER (THE FAKER) I’LL BE BACK IN THE SACK ATTACK! RICH FOLKS JOKES

Darn it Arnie – Turned away from Taj Mahal because Muslims were praying or was it because you were wearing just your skivvies?  This is a religious country and they don’t stand for any “hanky panky.”

Arnie’s 14-year old love child Joseph Baena wants to be a just like his dad wearing Conan the Barbarian Halloween costume with sword in hand.  Young Joe is starting out on the right foot for a piece of pussy.

Schwarzenegger opens museum in Austria displaying his bronzed-muscled body showing him with women in different x-rated sexual positions.

Naughty Arnold paid the “Merry Maid” when he got laid.  The louse bought her a house.  Did Arnold make a pact with the maid that he would attack her in the sack until she landed in the grave?  Does Arnold Schwarzenegger want to be saved from paying his illegitimate son and the maid?  Will the faker’s next acting role be a groovy screwin’ movie?  They say it’s animated about the maid he laid.  Arnold the rich “pr – -k” stars in new flick.

We know which muscle “Atlas Arnold” flexed when he laid the merry maid.

In a public interview “merry maid” discusses how she got screwed.

Maria says Arnold is super sexable and “Expendable 2.”  So what’s a guy to do when he’s over the hill?  Play an old man in”The Last Stand.”

TIGER DIRTY JOKES FOR “WHOREY” FOLKS

The pro that can’t seem to get out of a hole.

Ex-mistress Rachel Uchitel’s husband Matt Hahn’s shlong is bigger than Tigers.

Tiger looks for whores at the grocery store.

The great “American-Prenup” – What’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine. Tiger’s fate when he pulled down his drawers and scored.

Hey Moe! What Joe? Did you know Tiger was “teed off” that his balls got stuck in some holes?

Say Harry what do you think about “shirtless” Tiger? Burt, he’s got a hairy belly and hairy nipples. When Tiger gets sexy with the girls it must tickle.

Tiger is a “con artist” Harry.  How’s that Burt? He had multiple sex partners and didn’t use condoms. Maybe that should be Woods next sponsor Harry.

You know Harry, “shirtless” Woods should get into the entertainment business. Like what Burt? If he could “rap n da hood.”

Hey Harry – What Burt? Well Tiger finally made his “2010″ New Year’s Resolution. And what’s that Burt? Just putt and don’t “f – – K” up.

Burt, did you hear the latest? No Harry. They say this cigar company is offering a $100,000 “smoking deal” to mighty Tiger. But Burt, shouldn’t Tiger be interested in promoting his hot “sex appeal?”

Say Moe! What Joe? What do you think gives Tiger more satisfaction, the golf course or intercourse? When his balls go into the holes Joe.

Moe, “How did Tiger score?” Joe, “When Tiger roared along came more blonde whores.”

Hey Moe, did you know Tiger’s real first name is “Eldrick?” No Joe. Come to think of it Eldrick rhymes with “p _ _ _ k.”

Say Harry. What Burt? Did you hear where Tiger’s nuts got stuck in a slut? Guess Tiger likes to “f – – k” rough Burt.

Hey Burt! How did Tiger screw up? By lying down Harry.

Hey Moe! What Joe? I wonder if sluts know how to putt? Joe, you just have to put your balls out.

In 2009 Tiger had a great time. He allegedly scored with “14″ whores. Tiger, the golf pro who knows how to get his balls into the every hole.

What do you know Moe, Tiger returns to the putting green in the spring. Tiger finally got over those sex flings Joe? Tiger took lessons in sexual behavior at this rehab facility. Now he knows where his balls should go.

Well Moe did you hear the latest? No, Joe. The rehab facility showed Tiger how to avoid getting his balls “stuck in those holes.”

Joe, I heard Elin is taking back Tiger.  Now that’s a “hole-in-one” Moe.

Did you hear Joe? What Moe? Tiger can’t wait to put his balls out on the course. What a sight that will be on the putting green.

Say Moe. What Joe? I wonder why PGA officials have kept their mouth shut about Tiger’s sluts. Moe, obviously the PGA doesn’t care what Tiger had to say as long as he plays. After all it all boils down to how Tiger positions his balls.

Well if this isn’t something Joe. What is it Moe? “Tiger Paws” draw customers to this new sensational iPhone application. It could have been neat for cheats like Tiger Woods. There’s a prompt that deletes those embarrassing text sex messages. Cover your tracks – Wife or girlfriend can’t claw back.

I heard Tiger is back home in Orlando Joe. Moe, he’s into his old routine of exercising and playing with his balls on the putting green.

Hey Moe did you know that Tiger’s alleged ex-mistress, famed porn star Joslyn James showed up at an Oscar party? The ho obviously needs the dough.

Joe, did you hear the latest news. What’s that Moe? Tiger is practicing for the U.S. Masters in April. Now the public can finally view what his balls can do.

Now this is going to be something Joe. Yeah Moe. Comcast for the first time will be broadcasting the Masters in 3D and over the Internet. Think of the millions of lucky subscribers who are going to see Tiger’s balls pop out in 3D.

This just came in Moe. Tiger announced he’s excited to get back to golf and play with his balls. He’s just wondering what the public’s reaction will be.

Hey Joe, I hear Joslyn James is planning to be at Tiger’s Master’s grand opening. Isn’t she something Moe? I’ll bet she’ll yell, “Tiger you can put your balls in my hole.”

Moe, Tiger needs a lesson in good manners. He should not have said, “Goddamnit, you suck!” Tiger probably meant to say as those nasty plane banners flew by “Shucks! I miss those sluts.”

Joe, do you know the difference between Buddhism and Bootyism?  A good screw.

Moe, I heard Trojan condoms wants to be Tiger’s new sponsor with a company slogan  “Protect Your Peck.”

Hey Joe, Tiger missed the cut at Quail Hollow tournament.  Guess he had his mind on those sluts Moe.

Did you hear Tiger say he had a neck injury Moe?  I thought it would be a peck injury from those “hoes” Joe.

Hey Burt!  Did you hear the latest dirt?  What is it Harry?  Tiger just came out with a new sex game.  It’s called “Cheetah Repeater.”

Harry, I heard Tiger did not win the U.S. Open.  Burt, his balls were too big for the holes.

Hey Joe! What is it Moe?  Heard Tiger switched from eating breakfast at Perkins Restaurant to Hooters as the gals are a lot cuter.  His favorite dish is grits and “hot sausages.”  Tiger likes when the waitresses take a bite.

I’ll betcha Moe now that Tiger is divorced he can’t wait to get his paws around those whores.

Look who’s coming to Celebrity Rehab 4 Joe.  Tiger’s #1 bang, Rachel Uchitel.  This slut wants big bucks – It sure pays to f – – k.  Now she’ll get paid as a celebrity just for whoring around the town.

Can Tiger’s new goatee tickle a pussy?

Harry – What Burt?  Now that Tiger is divorced he can bang any whore.  Maybe they don’t want him anymore.  I heard he’s cheap and nasty.  The guy has no class when it comes to a piece of ass.

Burt – What Harry?  I hear this dame, Devon James tried to “stick it” to Tiger.  You mean he “stuck his dick?”  Well that’s probably true for a good screw, but James is looking for fame just like the other porn dames.  She tried to ram him with a sex tape scam.  Some look alike Woods’ guy posed in Nike clothing setup for a commercial.  Is there anything more hurtful than “Tiger the jerk?”

Hey Burt!  What’s up Harry?  Tiger just paid $50 million bucks for his Jupiter pad where there are enough rooms to fuck “50 sluts.”

Soar loser Tiger roars for more whores!

Moe we now know what Tiger does when he has a fit?  He spits.  It just shows how that Tiger can’t control what comes out of his mouth.

What makes Tiger happy?  When the girls are looking at his balls.

Tiger misses putt as his mind was only on a good f – – k!

Woods plays a losing game ’cause lately he hasn’t fucked a dame

ECONOMIC COMEDY (POKE POLITICAL FOLKS)

By the way Harry, is it “Stimulus” (or) “Stimuless?” I’m not sure Burt – I think the government wants to confuse us.

Do you know what happened to all that “Stimulus” money Harry?  No Burt, where did it all go?  Well, the economy is still the same so I guess the money went down the drain.  Obama says it went for “Shovel-Ready Projects” but no money was left for the shovels.  Why can’t a man just dig with his hands?  You should ask Obama.  He seems to have an answer for everything.  Isn’t that why we elected him because he’s such a genius.

What is a U.S. recession? “Time off from work with no perks.”

What is global recession? “The World Stands Still.”

What is a depression? “Soup lines in tasty varieties.”

They fired me because I couldn’t afford the company’s health insurance. Then the IRS gave me a hefty penalty. Now I’m really sick from Obama’s stupid politics.

Did you hear the latest news Moe? No, Joe. Well, in order to pass the Health Care bill they say “Uncle Sam” needs more revenue – He wants to tax the banks, the rich and private health care plans. Joe, who the heck is Sam? Moe, he must be somebody’s uncle on Capitol Hill.

Moe, what do you think about employees “working for free?” Joe, at least they have a job. But Moe, the boss wants to furlough his employees with no money. Joe, you know money isn’t everything.

My company is having a “wage freeze.”  That sounds like a cool idea.

In this lousy economy, who says “money isn’t everything?” It buys food, clothing and housing. Well, we could eat leaves off the trees, become nudists and rent tents.

Why is money tight? Did you ever try to stretch a dollar?

I came home one day to find my house was gone. The government removed it from my lawn. What on earth went wrong? They discontinued “Cash for Clunkers Home Program.”

I can’t figure out how Obama got into office. Here’s a guy who doesn’t know how to connect dots.

Obama’s policies add up to nothing but loose change.

President Obama’s future announcement to the American people. “You have nothing to fear my fellow Americans, but somehow the terrorists attacked us.” The buck stops with me. I take the blame. There’s not one person in my cabinet that’s a “lamebrain.”

Recent poll shows the President’s approval ratings have significantly dropped. Obama plans his strategy by moving the White House office to his vacation spot in Hawaii. He’s hoping to convince the American people that nicer views can improve his radical policies.

Are you a Democrat or a Republican? I’m an independent thinker. Oh, you’re one of those.

I heard the dollar was worthless in some foreign countries. Americans are trying to buy the Japanese Yen with Sen-Sen.

What did you think about Sen. Harry Reid’s racial Obama remarks? I thought Reid was a “wise white guy.”

What’s up Harry Reid’s sleeve?  He tried to get special pork deals in Nevada, but his Democratic cronies don’t like baloney.

Go figure this one out Burt. Terrorists can now plead “not guilty.” They’ve got rights like you and me Harry? Burt, this is democracy.

Burt, do you know why Nancy Pelosi was elected “Speaker of the House?” She’s smart Harry. No Burt – Members of the House of Representatives say she’s a “loudmouth.”

Moe, did you see Harry Reid yawning at Obama’s “State of the Union” address? Joe, Reid looked like he was bored to death. I’m surprised other Democrats didn’t take a nap.

Joe, did you notice Pelosi constantly getting up. It must be hard for her to sit on her can. Don’t they call that “clap mania?” She must have that disease Joe. No, she just likes to clap Moe.

Obama promises “bipartisan” as long as Republicans don’t oppose him.

Obama is not taking any chances. His new flight rules before boarding Air Force One – All secret service agents will have to go through body and hand scanners.

Obama was against the war. Now he’s following the Bush policies. Quite a few displeased Democrats are retiring and stating: Obama, “Yes We Can.” Frankly, we don’t give a damn.

Obama is outrageous in Vegas! His new economic policy will stop change coming out of slot machines. He says, this is a good step in the right direction for people to start saving their money.

At a special news conference President Obama tells the American people, “It’s my way or the highway.” Some Democrats are seen leaving Washington via the expressway.

Obama caught “lip-syncing” while giving a speech. The Prez says it only appeared to be “lip-syncing.” Actually I was falling asleep. Just ask Nancy Pelosi – She’ll vouch for me.

Here’s the latest political news. The tea party has turned into a coffee clutch. No more bagels and tea. It’s donuts and coffee.

Sex change operations should be covered under the new Health-Care bill. Remember Obama’s campaign promise, “Change We Can Believe In.”

Obama to Biden – Get Real! You’re no f – – kin’ deal.

Peek-a-boo – Obamacare has surprises for you. Democrat staffers who wrote the bill and the President are exempt from the new health care plan. We are “privileged” not like the rest of you. This does not mean American citizens are being discriminated against.  Everyone has constitutional rights.

Obama says I’m not a “Socialist.”  Just trying to nationalize the banks, health care, Wall Street (financial reform) and private industry.  Government control to cure America’s woes.  That’s why the people voted for me so I could change the entire country.

Obama takes a stand on senior staffers at the SEC who were caught watching pornography.  These guys work hard enough – They’re entitled to some good stuff.

President Obama wants the American people to know that no one from his administration bribes anyone.  It’s the other way around, they bribe us.

Nancy Pelosi can’t seem to keep her big mouth shut as she speaks on “Health Care.”  Protestors screamed and began to throw things, but Nancy refused to stop talking.  The mean bitch just kept slamming her gavel stick!

BP CEO Tony Hayward accepts President Obama’s invitation to the White House with one exception, he prefers tea and scones to beer and pretzels.

Nero played his fiddle while Rome was burning – Why can’t Obama go golfing and BP CEO big shot Tony Hayward go yacht clubbing as oil continues to spill?

The Prez says, “I’m not concerned about job losses – unemployment benefits should fix it.  The economy and BP worries me.”

President Obama says he knows what the average American Joe is going through for his family is also experiencing hard times.  He’s cut down on expenses and taking his wife and children on vacation to Martha’s Vineyard in August.

Tony Hayward is finally getting his life back – BP is shipping him to Siberia.

Obama goes on “The View” not knowing the latest news.  When asked who “Snooki” was he just smiled and shrugged.  Who doesn’t know the “Jersey Shore” show.  He certainly was unprepared.  It leaves one wondering does Obama know what’s really happening to our economy.

This went down in history – Marie Antoinette, Queen of France danced around the Palace of Versailles.  When told the citizens have no bread she said “Let them eat cake.”  Michelle Obama sees fit to go on a luxurious trip to Spain at a time when people are living off of food stamps, out of work, a bad economy, no money.  Marie Antoinette was not thinking of the people and neither is Michelle Obama.  Why Spain and not the U.S.?  Spending in our country keeps the economy rolling.  Marie Antoinette was beheaded while Michelle Obama remains a featherbrain.

Did you see Obama on National TV trying to charm us with his new “Stimuless” policy?  He’ll do anything for a Democratic victory.

Many states across the country protesting Obama’s Health Care Reform with their slogan, “Patients’ Bill of Fights.”

Obama’s new economic strategy – He’s hiring a team of Republican advisers.

Republicans and 10 moderate Democrats want to “oust the grouch” Pelosi Speaker of the House.  Congressional leaders intend to make a sweeping move for this wicked witch with a broom.

Americans fear “Obamacare” – They’ve renamed it “Obamascare.”

Republicans fight for their “Civil Rights” as Obama tells them they can sit in the back of the car while the Middle Class can sit up front.   Obama, your remark is sheer stupidity.  This indeed is racism.  We immediately expect an apology.

Excuse me – What happened to the Tea Party?  Oh! They just stepped out for a cup of coffee.

President Obama addresses the nation from India.  My fellow Americans, me & Michelle are having a ball at the Hotel Taj Mahal.  We’ve been dancing away every day, but it’s just not fun and games.  Even though this trip cost you taxpayers millions of dollars it was worth every penny.  I’ve negotiated a whopping “50,000″ jobs for the USA.  Isn’t this great?  Just think of “50,000″ employed people in a failing economy will certainly bring down the unemployment rate which now stands at 9.6% adding up to millions upon millions of people that are still out of work.  I should be congratulated for the fabulous job I’ve done.

Trump says the American people are in the dumps.  Donald Trump would like to fire President Obama because he’s bombed on relations with other countries and our economy.  The only thing Donald sees is a nice man with a lots of charm.

Nancy Pelosi is so happy.  She couldn’t keep her mouth shut until she got the “2nd” spot as Minority Speaker of the House.  Most Democrats see her as a dirty rat since they can’t get their jobs back.

While pitching a basketball Obama gets hit on the lip by a player’s elbow.  If Obama can’t play a defensive game how the heck can we expect him to fix this rotten economy.

Obama’s political tricks – Bill Clinton takes over for Obama with his schpeel appeal on a tax extension deal while Obama steps out for some holiday partying with Michelle.

Nobama Drama!  O’Reilly of Fox News asks Obama if he’s moving toward the center.   The Prez says, “I go the way the wind blows.  Hey Folks! No wonder why our economy is still failing.

Obama goes golfing while the world is in a turmoil.

President Obama decides to run again for the presidency by throwing his golf hat into the ring.

Obama says he was born in Hawaii.  Was it before or after U.S. made Hawaii a state?

Since President Obama has visited a Toledo auto plant and seen how the bailout worked for the auto industry, he’s come up with a new plan to save the American people from a dying economy. Americans won’t have to worry about losing their homes, cars and savings with his new programs for “job training.” As an example, a banker who lost his job in the financial sector can be trained on the auto assembly line.

President Obama says for the economy to grow it takes time, but Obama doesn’t have to stand on the unemployment line.

Obama speaks on “shovel-ready” stimulus program that never materialized. President cracks a joke stating “shovel-ready was not “shovel-ready” as we expected.  But the “shovel is ready” to bury Obama for 14 unemployed Americans and the rest of the nation are not voting for him in next election.  Obama is no longer the charmer.  He’s “the man with no real plan.”

How can Americans get their fair share?  Congressional leaders don’t seem to care.  They take 5-week vacation break without resolving excessive federal spending and a fading credit rating leaving us poor slobs pounding the cement looking for a job.  What does this all mean?  We better learn to read and write Chinese for this will be the only way to make a living as China owns U.S. economy.

President Obama says he has a plan to create jobs and improve the slipping economy, but needs more time to think about it so he’s taking a two-week trip to Martha’s Vineyard for some relaxation, golfing and a skinny-dip.

Obama cracks under pressure from earthquake.  His face looks like a “Milkshake.”

Politicians receive wake-up call with 5.8 quake.

White House Cabinet shakeup after quake.

President Obama is calling for swift changes in immigration so he can keep his “alien in-laws” in this country.

Obama says his new “Jobs Package” should create at least 1 million jobs.  That’s all the money government has.  The other 13 million will just have to pray that things get better one day.

Obama’s charm is now a lingering “stink bomb.”

If not having a job makes you ill, here’s a hard pill to swallow.  Taxpayers foot White House bill for Obama the charmer’s West Coast hotels and travel campaign expenses for $10,000 per plate “fun raiser.”

Obama’s new slogan: “No We Can’t”

Obama promised to have jobs and the economy rolling by the end of his presidency.  Is that why he changed his slogan “Change we can believe in” to “We Can’t Wait.”  Mr. President, you’re nothing but “Johnny Come Lately.”

President Obama says “Americans are lazy” but what about Congress that does nothing but sit on their asses wasting taxpayers’ money.

Why do some people say Obama’s “State of the Union” is un-American?  Because they believe he’s a Muslim.

Obama is not a leader, but he can “wing it” as a singer.

President Obama says “Things could be worse” – It certainly would be if you’re re-elected for a second term.

Obama how many times do we have to tell you – “Man, you’re not the law of the land.”

VP Biden says Obama has a “big stick.”  Has Biden seen Obama’s p**ck?

Marine fired from military for putting Obama’s face on a donkey.  Lawyer pleads it wasn’t a donkey – it was a monkey.

DIRTY NURSERY TIME RHYMES

Georgie Porgie pudding and pie, kissed the girls and said goodbye for Georgie was only interested in guys.  He told them to unzip his fly and they all had a good time.

Once upon a time there lived a woman in a shoe with so many kids she didn’t know what to do.  Then one day she decided it was time to get rid of the kids for her old man was looking to get screwed.

Stupid Peter Peter a pumpkin eater wondered why he had a wife and couldn’t keep her.  His wife told Peter you may enjoy those scrumptious pumpkins, but I’m so much sweeter.  Peter replied, “Sorry I was a pumpkin head when I could be sucking you in bed.”

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet.  Then along came a spider who decided to sit down beside her.   Miss Muffet was taken by surprise when it weaved a web that opened her thighs, but then the spider said “F – – k” I got stuck.”

Georgie Porgie pudding pie kissed the girls and said goodbye.  Along came some guys and Georgie unzipped his fly.  He said are you “gay?”  Then they all ran away.

Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard, but when she got there Mr. Hubbard was bare.  Mother Hubbard stared at his balls.  That’s when Mr. Hubbard nailed her against the wall.

Mary Mary quite contrary how does your garden grow?  With silver bells and fellows all in a row dressed in cock tails and pretty maids looking to get laid.

How does Jane and Dick have fun?  Dick gives Jane his stick.  Jane plays with Dick.

I’ll be Jack – You be Jill.  Let’s meet at the top of the hill and give each other a thrill.  Jill forget to take her pill and had little baby Will.

Little Red Riding Hood took a trip through the woods.  She met a hungry wolf who was looking for something to eat.  Red Riding Hood invites the wolf over to her house for a treat.  When the big bad wolf arrives he tells Red Riding Hood “You look good enough to eat.”  Wolf stuck out his long tongue and reached for her under the sheets.  Little Red Riding Hood asks the wolf if he enjoyed his treat.

Jack Horner sat in the corner playing with his dingy.  His daddy came in and said “Jack what are you doing?”  Jack replied “I’m just being naughty daddy.”

Mary had a little lamb as white as snow and everywhere that Mary went the lamb was sure to go.  Mary didn’t give a damn about the little lamb.  She only thought how she could make it into Mutton Stew.  Then one day the little lamb took off and Mary got screwed.

Hickory Dickory Dock when the clock struck twelve this mouse took off his jock strap and slipped his cock into her overheated socket.

VAMPIRE JOKES FOR TWILIGHT FOLKS

I need a life and a Vampire wife.

Suckers are born every minute.

I’d love to bite you, but I have a dental appointment.

I’ll have a Bloody Mary with a cherry.

Vampires favorite gum “Juicy Fruit.”

Count Dracula loves “Ice Scream.”

You got bat breath.  Can you give me something to suck on?

I’d stake my life on it.

Love to ghoul around especially when I’m underground.

Cullens take coffin break.

You spike up my life.

Call me @ 1-800-Vampire (Not on Daylight Savings Time)

DIMWIT JOKES FOR SLOW-THINKING FOLKS

I’m a flight attendant with “Virgin Airlines.”  Does that mean you don’t screw around?

He “turned the tables” on me.  Did he turn the chairs?

He “missed the boat.”  Did he catch a plane?

God only knows.  How do you know?  He told me so.

Why do we need brains?  Think about it!

How many times are you going to tell me the same joke?  Until you have a stroke.

Can you repeat that joke -  I didn’t get it.

You suck!  No, I don’t!  I only f – – k.

A sucker is born every minute.  So is a f – – ker.

They say you’re “Slow Joe.” No! That’s my brother Moe.

GHOST JOKES FOR “EERIE” FOLKS

You’re as dark as that sheet. I’m a black ghost who scares people from coast to coast.

You’re as white as a sheet. I’m a scary ghost who only scares people from house to house.

Oh, I’m shivering! You must be afraid of us. No, I’m just cold.

By the way, I never knew there were two different ghosts.

Ghosts don’t discriminate against white or black folks.

Well how come you’re such small ghosts? If you like us we come in different sizes. Small, medium or large.

Do you have skeletons in your closets? No, only bones around our homes.

You certainly are eerie. No, we’re just scary.

Do you know any ghostly tales? Only spooky stories.

Can you tell me a few? Go to the library – Stop bothering us.

VALENTINE JOKES FOR HOT FOLKS

How did you like that charm bracelet I gave you for Valentine’s Day?  I ate it.

What’s a great snack for a guy to give his sweetheart?  Hot Sexy Nuts.

One guy says to another guy. “My wife is an angel.” The other guy replies, “My wife is the devil.” How do you know? She doesn’t have a pair of wings.

I see you’re all dressed up in red for “Valentine’s Day.” It’s the only way Fred will be able to recognize me as I just had plastic surgery.

You gave me a box of hollow chocolates.  I thought they’d be easier to swallow.

This heart locket has another girl’s picture in it.  Oh! I gave you the wrong locket.

The red roses you sent were wilted.  It feels like I’ve been jilted. Honey, how can I make it up to you? By giving me a good Valentine screw.

BUNNY BIZNESS (YOLK JOKES)

Bunny buys his honey bunny an Easter gift – Then tells store clerk to “rabbit up.”

Bunnies hop, but do bunnies hump?

Bunnies like to beat up eggs.

When a bunny grows up what does it want to be?  “Playboy Bunny.”

What foreign airline do rabbits use?  British Hare-Ways.

This rabbit had a hoppy ending.

Why do rabbits eat carrots?  Did you ever see a rabbit with eyeglasses?

Can I rub your rabbit’s foot for good luck?  No, but you can rub me the right way for a good lay.

What did one egg say to another egg?  You broke my yolk.

Stop being such a chicken.  I can be a duck – Then we can “f – -k.”

Isn’t she a hot chick?  I like the way her feathers tickle me.

What kind of soup do bunnies enjoy?  Egg Drop.

Why do bunnies go to the gym?  For eggercise.

What do bunnies get when they have bad feet?  Bunions.

Why do rabbits go to the barbershop?  For a shave and a hare cut.

Yolk Joke!  You got egg all over your face.  That’s my eggshell makeup.

Where does a cracked egg go when it’s depressed?  To the psychiatrist.

Why do bunnies have large ears? Because they like to eat ears of corn.

What did one bunny say to another bunny? See if you can hop over me.

A bunny was hungry and decided to stop at IHOP.

Energizer bunny arrested for fraudulent cell phone charges.

How does a rabbit comb his fur? With a soft harebrush.

Two bunnies caressing in a vegetable garden.  “Lettuce Love.”

When a bunny has a fever – It’s a “hot bunny.”

One rabbit said to another rabbit – Can you hare me?

He’s a good egg – Always cracking jokes.

Before you put all your eggs into one basket – Make sure you know the eggsact total.

Easter egg cracked from too much pressure.

An egg said something funny to another egg who replied, “You crack me up!” Now my thoughts are scrambled.

Look! It’s a hoppy bunny.

This bunny got into a very “harey” situation.

What’s two drunken bunnies in a card game? “Gin Rummy Bunnies.”

Easter eggs don’t discriminate – They come in white and brown.

HOLLY JOLLY SANTA/NEW YEAR’S JOKES FOR MERRY FOLKS

Santa’s favorite dessert – “Snow Cones.”

How does Santa get around without his sleigh?  He uses a “Snowmobile.”

Why is Rudolph the Reindeer so curious?  Because he’s nosey.

T’was the night before Christmas and Santa was pissed.  The elves forgot to wrap his gifts.

There’s no difference between ornaments on a Christmas tree and a priest.   They both have balls.

What are you eating on Christmas eve?  Eve!

Do you know why Kris Kringle is single?  He faltered at the altar.

Your gift is not under the tree, it’s in the bed with me.

Harry, what are you doing for New Year’s eve? Burt, it’s just gonna be Eve and me celebrating.

Santa’s balls got caught in his sleigh.

Why was Santa mad at the elves? For not taking the toys off the shelves.

What did Jolly Santa say to the toys on Christmas Eve? It’s time for me to “rap in the sack.”

Every time I want to be with you for the holidays you always get “cold feet.” How do you know I’ve got “cold feet?” – You’ve never slept with me.  Sorry, I mixed you up with someone else.

What did a Christmas tree say to the Hanukkah bush? How come they didn’t cut you down – You’re still rooted in the ground? The Jewish bush replied, “Well that’s what you get for being a Scotch pine.”

How do polar bears make love at the North Pole? “Cuddly Bear Hugs.”

When Santa cuddled up to Mrs. Claus what did he say? “Kriss Me Baby.”

Jack Frost and Frosty the Snowman got into a snowball fight. Eventually they both agreed, “Let’s chill out.”

Why did Santa have sleigh trouble? Because his reindeer forgot to put on their fur coats.

What do elves hate to bake? Shortening bread.

What did one elf say to another elf? “Elf Me Baby.”

If anybody knows how to give a good “Snow Job,” it’s you.  Hey, I never shoveled snow in my life.

What’s the story behind Rudolph the reindeer with a “red nose?” One snowy day Rudolph stayed too long in the cold and his nose froze.

Why does Jolly Santa say “ho, ho, ho?” He’s not allowed to say “ha, ha, ha.” When you live in the North Pole there are Christmas restrictions. So why doesn’t Santa move to the South Pole? Because Santa is too fat and too old.

Will Santa stop by my house? Only If you have a chimney. Well we don’t have a fireplace. Why can’t he come to the front door? That’s not the way he makes deliveries. I’m gonna be pissed if I don’t get my gifts from Santa for Christmas!

For girls who are naughty or nice – Santa knows how to spice up your life.

CRAZY JOKES FOR NUTTY FOLKS

Picture this – I was framed.

Your jokes stink.  I didn’t know they smell.

Our company is very reliable.  We should be there within the next 6 months.

Are you a “worrywart?”  I don’t have to worry.  I have no warts.

I’m burning bridges.  How will you get back home?

I’ll “get your goat.”  No you won’t – Not my goatee.

You can bank on me.  Thanks for giving me access to your checking.

Why cry when you can die laughing.

I’d love to chew you out.  Where would you like to start eating me?

Boyfriend asks girlfriend what she would like for breakfast.  “Chock full of Nuts.”

I like to mess around.  Then you better clean up the kitchen.

You are a “meat head.”  I’m a vegetarian.

You’re driving me crazy.  I don’t own a car.

I’m gonna cop a feel.  With a police officer?

I need you like this hole in my head.  Is that why you’re empty-headed?

She’s stuck on you.  Can you remove the glue?

What’s the last movie you saw?  “SAW”

She’s a stranger in the night.  Is she friendly during the day?

I can “f – – k” you anytime.  No you can’t!  I’m only available lunch time.

Why do jerks get hurt?  Does anyone know the answer?

You’re trashy thoughts are all over the place.  I’ll clean ‘em up.

He laughed his head off.  Did he put it back?

Do you have a Bachelor or University degree?  Bachelor since I’m single.

I play it safe.  What do you mean?  I walk very carefully.

How many jerks do you know?  Only you!

There’s something wrong with this picture.  It’s upside down.  Put on your glasses.

You’re a creep.  It takes one to know one.

You have that “Midas” touch.  Is that why everything turned to gold?

Attention: Block Buster is in bankruptcy – No need to return the videos – Only the movies.

Police arrest this guy for downloading “Kiddy Porn.”  He says the computer got attacked by his horny pussy.

He has a chip on his shoulder.  Why doesn’t he take it off.  It’s too heavy.

You look like a smart alec.  No, I’m joe schmoe.

The boss gave him a “pink slip.”  Maybe he’s gay.

I like fast food.  I prefer slow cookin’.

You’re as cool as a cucumber.  I can be a “Hot Tamale.”

How do you know he’s “Mr. Right?”  Because he’s never wrong.

You’re a “Peeping Tom.”  My name is Joe.

I got a ticket for Jaywalking.  How come Jay didn’t get a ticket?

You are what you eat.  Is that why you’re so fat?

It takes two to tango.  I don’t know how to dance.

I’m returning the car.  Why?  It’s a lemon.  I thought yellow was your favorite color.

Are you on the graveyard shift?  I don’t work at a cemetery.

He lost his head over you.  Did he find it?  No, he’s still searching.

Pardon my French.  Excuse my dirty English.

You’re barking up the wrong tree.  How do you know it’s not the right tree?

I have a Charley horse.  Well my horse is named Eddie.

Lend me an ear.  Only if you return it.

That’s the last straw.  No it’s not – I got another box.

Curiosity killed the cat.  Do we know what killed the dog?

I walked a crooked mile.  You must be dizzy.

I’m on pins and needles.  That must hurt.

Do you have a circle of friends?  No, most of my friends are square.

You’re a busybody.  That’s what the guys tell me.

They’re gonna roast you at the party.  Who’s cookin’ me?

How do you feel?  With my hands.

Was that car expensive?  It cost me an arm and a leg.

Put your best foot forward.  Which one?  They both look alike.

Are you awake?  No! I’m sleeping.  Then how can you be talking to me?  I talk in my sleep.

I just got up from this horrible nightmare.  What was the dream about? “You!”

Is “Holy Shit!” sacred?  If God blessed it.

Can you lend me a hand?  Which one do you want the right or the left?

Do you pass gas?  I certainly do – Every time I pass the gas station.

You’re always talking dirty.  I can talk clean.  Just have to wash my mouth with Listerine.

Either you’re stupid or smart.  There’s no in between.  What about half-wit?

Why do priests like to eat swiss cheese?  Because it’s holy.

I’m leading a double life.  How is that?  I have a twin sister.

Who was that girl you took out last night?  I couldn’t tell, she was my blind date.

You can kiss my ass.  I’ve never kissed a donkey.

It’s either my way or the highway.  I’m taking a different route.

Can you crack a joke?  Sure, why not – I can break it apart.

Are you in the dog house?  No, I’m in the pussy house.

Laughed my head off.  I knew there was something different about you.

What kind of nuts do you enjoy?  Starts with the letter “p” – Like “pen- -?

I lost my memory.  I’ll help you find it.

You’re always screwing around.  Is there a better way to do it?  Yeah! Up and down.

Misery loves company.  Don’t invite me.

You’re a “crackpot.”  I’m no drug addict.

Time on your hands?  Wipe it off.

Stupidity runs in your family.  It does not – I’m the only stupid one.

I’m the census taker.  Are you an African, Caucasian or Hindu?  Can’t you tell just by looking at me?

You have a big heart.  How would you know – You’re not a doctor.

You’re killing me!  I never touched you.

You got a “poker face.” I guess it shows how much I love playing poker.

Man, you’re full of shit!  I am full of shit especially when I take your crap.

Is your house in “apple-pie order?” I don’t buy apple pies.

You’ve got egg all over your face.  I just ate breakfast.

You’re a hog. Do I look like a pig? You really want to know?

Let’s shoot the breeze.  How could I shoot the breeze?  I don’t own a gun.

Have you saved for a rainy day?  It never rains where I live.

You look like “Plain Jane.”  How did you know my name?

Put up or shut up!  Hey, enough is enough.  I can’t put up with you continuously telling me to shut up.

You’ve got to have the last word.  No, I don’t.  See – There you go again!

You can’t have your cake and eat it too!  I just ate a delicious chocolate cake.

I’m in a hole.  Here’s a shovel – Go dig yourself out.

Moe, leave no stone unturned.  Joe, do you know how many stones there are in this world?

Holy cow!  I didn’t know there were religious cows – God bless the animals.

You’re a real pig.  Is there a fake one?

You have a forked tongue. Oh yeah! You have a spoon tongue. What the heck is a spoon tongue? Not as sharp as a fork.

Don’t cry over spilled milk – It could have been imported wine.

I need some “shut-eye.”  What about the other eye?

Get out of my face.  How the heck did I get in there?

I don’t like you hanging around me all the time.  How does a few seconds appeal to you?

Eat those words!  Do they taste good?

I got up this morning on the wrong side of the bed.  What do you mean?  It wasn’t the right side.

You electrify me.  Really?  I’m shocked.

Don’t be stupid all your life – Half is enough.

You’re a riot!  Where’s the crowd?

You smell funny.  That must be my cooking honey.

Oh go ahead and tickle me.  Why?  I want to see if I’m awake.

Moe, I betcha you didn’t know that God mends all souls? Joe, maybe I can give God my shoes to fix ’cause my soles got holes.

Who are those funny looking people? That’s your family.

You’re full of baloney! How did you know what I just ate?

I’m tired of you!  Oh go to sleep and count sheep.

I’m special.  Oh Yeah! What makes you so special? There’s nobody in the world like me. You ain’t kidding.

Show me yours – I’ll show you mine. No way, I’ve got a secret opening. Really? You need a key to my kingdom. There’s no other way to get in. Well, I know how to make a hole.

You’re pathetic!  I’m just getting started.

The “grass is greener on the other side.” There is no grass on this side.

How stupid can you be?  You’d be surprised!

You’re “nutty as a fruit cake.”  When did you ever taste a nutty fruit cake?  I never ate one – I’m just not crazy about nuts.

Asked this guy if he wanted to buy the Brooklyn Bridge. He replied, I got a “steel of a deal” for George Washington’s Bridge. By the way, which side did he buy, New York or New Jersey?

You’re dead wrong.  That’s not true.  I’m still alive – So I’m right!

You caught my eye.  Want it back?  No, that’s just my spare.  “I see.”

When climbing the ladder to success – Make sure it’s sturdy!

Who died and made you boss?  God! You can’t be serious?  Why not, I got good connections.

Hey Moe, what do you think about living on the moon? Joe, what bothers me is that I won’t run into anyone I know.

You’re all washed up.  No, I’m not.  I forgot to take a shower.

“JERKY TURKEY” JOKES FOR WISHBONE FOLKS

Where did the Pilgrims land?  At a Hard Rock Place.

What part of the turkey do you enjoy?  Turkey Balls – They’re the best!

What did the turkey say when it got dipped in gravy?  Now I’m really messed up.

Two turkeys hoping for a better life  – Let’s get on the “gravy train.”

When turkeys get together for a summer party – They pec-nic.

What did one turkey say to another?  Stop using that “fowl” language.

Two turkeys stitched together. “I’m stuck on you.”

“Turkey slams the Ham” – Stop being a hog!

“Ham slams the Turkey” – I’ve had enough of your “gobble-gobble.”

“Turkey Snitch” Hey Mom! Tom got into the hen house.

“Turkey Talk” Let’s make love before they stuff and cook us in the oven. What should we do? You can play with my drumstick while I caress your breast.  That’s the breast piece I ever had.

What do you like white or dark meat?  Who cares as long as the breast is nice and sweet.

SCARY FOLKS HALLOWEEN JOKES

What happens to a pumpkin when it gets mashed.  Squash!

How do you repair a broken-hearted pumpkin?  With a pumpkin patch.

What did one skeleton say to another skeleton?  I’m just a “bag of bones.”

Why are you screaming?  A vampire sucked blood out of me.

What do witches like to eat?  Sandwiches.

Witch with a nervous condition – Twitch.

What can witches do well?  They can spell.

Why do witches go to hell?  Because they have hot spells.

Look!  It’s a scary scarecrow.  Stay away from my hay!

“Pumpkin Eater” It’s nice to meet a cute orange fruit.  Can we bump pumpkins?  As long as you don’t make a hole in my face.

One pumpkin to another pumpkin – Heard there’s a shortage of pumpkins this year. Boy, do I hate to be minced in a pinch.

This pumpkin complains to another pumpkin – I’m all dried up. Please help me! Here, you can have my “juicy fruit.” Gosh, I hope you don’t shrivel up. Don’t worry, I’ve been around long enough.

CLEAN & DIRTY JOKES FOR PLAIN FOLKS

I don’t give a “rat’s ass” about her.  What about her “pussy ass?”

This cat is looking for a pussy.

You can search my engine anytime.

Does Daffy Duck “f – – k?”

You got some pair of balls.  How would you know?  I saw them.

Will you be my “Sugar Daddy?”  Only if you suck me.

The first year of my marriage was hard, but after that he was soft.

She’s got a cute ass – That’s not her ass – It’s her face.

He gave her the finger – Which one?

I got screwed – Good for you.

Why are you shaking your ass?  I got ants in my pants.  Don’t sit on me.

Is that your rooster?  No, it’s my cock.

I love to suck “tootsies.”  Tootsie Rolls?  No, those cute sexy girls.

It’s a “Cock and Bull” story.”  I just want to know what happened to the “Cock?”

Would you rather eat or have sex?  I can do both.  “Pussy Eating.”

Do you like Tom, Dick or Harry?  I prefer Dick.

Do you know how to  grind?  Sure do – That’s where I put my meat into.

I live in the red light district.  Where’s that?  “Little Whore on the Prairie.”

What’s a word that rhymes with duck?  You have a dirty mind.  What’s dirty  about a duck?

Do you live in the city?  No, I’m just a cuntry girl.

What’s been eating you lately?  My boyfriend.

I’m in like Flynn.  Flynn never got in.

This guy really turned me off.  Let me show you how I can turn you on.

I’d bend over backwards.  That’s my favorite position.

Have you lost all your marbles?  No, I still have two balls.

Former VP Al Gore denies Portland masseuse played with his hot dog.

Do you eat dates?  I sure do – Eat everyone of my girlfriends I take out on a date.

Stop pulling my leg.  I thought it was that other thing in between.

I’m looking for a snow job.  We only do blow jobs.

Meg, you’re like a chicken without a head.  Ken, you’re like a hen without a pecker.

Cat got your tongue? I don’t have a pussy.

I can’t stomach you. Then kiss my ass.

I would love to have sex with you.  Sorry, but I’m booked till next year.

Have you seen my “shtick?”  I don’t like dirty talk.  I said my “shtick” not my “p _ _ _ k.”

You’re a joke.  You’re a bigger joke.  How big is that?

What’s a “cool Italiano?” Italian ices.

If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times. You never told me anything a thousand times. You know what your problem is? What? You can’t count!

I have second thoughts.  What were your first thoughts?

I’m turning over a new leaf. What happened to the old leaf? It withered away one autumn day.

Why are you in the insane asylum? They say I wasn’t thinking straight. Maybe they would have put me in a different place if I had crooked thoughts. What do you think? You’re not all there. That’s incorrect – I am here.

Do you believe in love at first fright?  I don’t mind her screaming ever now and then.

Where can I find a hooker?  Just go to “Craigslist.”

Are your neighbors a “pain in the ass?” – Haunt them to death.

The secret to a happy marriage.  Don’t screw up!

I used to have a different life.  Where was that? In a different world.

You don’t have to shout, I can hear you.  But I can’t hear you!

I’ll keep an eye out for you.  What’s the other eye going to do?

You have one blue eye and one brown eye. They give me a better view on life.

You look French. Really? You don’t look like an American.

I’d like a new life.  This one isn’t working for me.  Here’s your refund.

You don’t have a leg to stand on.  Oh yes I do.  See my false one.

Pardon my back.  Excuse my front.  What about sides?

I’m mad about you.  Don’t come near me.  You’re crazy!

Your dog barks all day long.  Okay, I’ll reverse it – He’ll bark all night long.

A penny for your thoughts.  Boy, are you cheap!

You’re not too bright. Gosh!  I forgot to turn my lights on.

All you do is gossip.  What else is there to do? Shut up and screw.

Life is the same old thing every day – Living and breathing!

I can’t stand you.  Then sit down. Maybe you’ll feel differently about me.

You’re a soda jerk.  You just hurt my feelings.

You’ll die laughing after you hear this joke.  I’m not listening, I’d rather live.

You rub me the wrong way.  I’ll show you how to rub me the right way.

Do you want to tell a clean joke?  Then wash your mouth with soap.

Dirty jokes arouse the old folks.

Dopes tell stupid jokes.

This is cool! Good Humor jokes told by the ice cream man.

This is hot! Why is sex the best? “Saks” Fifth Avenue department store where shoppers get more.

Kopy and paste your date.  Now you have a lifetime mate.

Experience is the best teacher.  The teacher was my best experience.

This is a really dirty joke folks.  Some kid was shoved into a pile of mud.

Mister, can ya spare a dime?  If I had money, I would sit up all night counting it.

What happens to money when you put it in the fridge? “Frozen Assets.”

I need money in a hurry – Make sure it’s all in one dollar bills.

Are you for real?  No, I’m fake.

When opportunity knocks open the door – It could be a whore! What more could one ask for? Two whores!

Are you stupid or smart?  Let me think about this for a while.

I’m over the hill.  It’s too far for me to walk.

I’ve fallen for you.  Can I help you get up?

I screwed up.  Really?  I screw lying down.

You don’t have your head on straight.  I didn’t realize it was on crooked.

Never met a person I didn’t like, except you.

I’m blue over you.  I thought you looked a little off-color.

I can’t stop laughing.  What’s so funny?  I hit my funny bone.

Ashes to ashes and dust to dust, what is a body without a bust? “Flat chested.”

Why are people dying to get into the cemetery?  It’s “dirt cheap.”

Why are people dying to get out of the cemetery? They don’t dig it!

I’ve got my eye on that seat.  Don’t sit on it!

Did you contact your optometrist?

I did a two-step with one foot. How’s that possible? I tapped “twice.”

Is that what you’re wearing?  Why, you don’t like it? Go put some clothes on.

Your “poodle hairstyle” gives you that dog-face look.

I’m a slave in the kitchen, but I’m free in the bedroom.

You’re invited over for dinner – When my wife is not home.

Where is Second Avenue?  Right after First.  Can’t you read?

I never worry about making mistakes – I’ve got an eraser.

You’ve got “no brains.”  So why am I thinking about you?

What is Manslaughter?  When you slaughter a man in a pig pen.

This is a fishy story. “Fish tale of a whale.”

People say “I’m funny” but my objective is to get your money.

This is the end of the jokes my website friends.

* * * * * *

© Copyright 2012, a creation by The Jester from Westchester

(One laugh a day keeps the doctor away)

All Rights Reserved

A MAN WHO WAS ON THE EDGE OF DIVORCE

IS TAKING THIS COUNTRY ON THE WRONG COURSE

* * * * * *

LET’S REMAKE AMERICA GREAT!

“REPEAL DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE ACT”

CHANGING THE SCREWIN’ RULES

* * * * * *

THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR “ONE-YEAR” IN THE SENATE

“A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS AND SAME-SEX WRONG REASONS”

* * * * * *

OBAMA’S NEW CAMPAIGN SLOGAN IS MOVING “FORWARD”

THEN WHY DO MOST AMERICANS FEEL OBAMA’S POLICIES HAVE TAKEN THEM “BACKWARDS?”

“A DECLINING ECONOMY”

WHERE FOOD, CLOTHING, HOUSING,  EDUCATION AND ENERGY COSTS ARE RISING WHILE OUR POCKETBOOKS ARE SHRINKING!

THINK OF THE “STIMULUS” MONEY NOT WORKING AND THEN THE “CREDIT CRUNCH” WHERE PEOPLE WEREN’T BUYING ENOUGH SO THE FEDERAL RESERVE INJECTED BILLIONS INTO THE ECONOMY AND LOWERED INTEREST RATES TO GET AMERICANS TO GO ON A BUYING SPREE.  OBAMA DECLARED A “CURRENCY WAR” AGAINST THE DOLLAR.  THE ONLY THING THAT HAPPENED WAS PROPPING UP SHAKY, INSOLVENT CORPORATIONS WITH A FALSE IMAGE THROUGH INFLATED STOCK PRICES AND CEO EXTRAVAGANT BONUSES WHILE THE AVERAGE AMERICAN MAKES MONEY BY WORKING, NOT SPECULATING

WHILE OBAMA TAKES VACATIONS AROUND THE WORLD AND NATION THE AVERAGE WORKER HAS TWO AND THREE JOBS JUST TO KEEP PACE WITH THEIR DECLINING PURCHASING POWER AS FOOD PRICES RISE AND OTHER COMMODITIES.  AMERICA SHOULD FEAR ON THE HOME FRONT AND ABROAD BECAUSE IT’S WEAKER THAN IT HAS EVER BEEN IN THE LAST 60 YEARS.  SHAME ON OBAMA FOR PUTTING THE BLAME ON OTHERS FOR HIS BLUNDERS.  NO MATTER WHO GETS INTO OFFICE IN NOVEMBER, AMERICA WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AFTER OBAMA’S REIGN

* * * * * *

NOT ENOUGH PEOPLE ARE WORKING TO FUND SOCIAL SECURITY – THERE MIGHT NOT BE ENOUGH MONEY FOR FUTURE RETIREMENT

* * * * * *

VP BIDEN SAYS OBAMA HAS A BIG STICK -  HE’S SEEN HIS P**CK?

THESE DEMOCRATS ARE GETTING RICH WITH THEIR SCHTICK!

* * * * * *

“FAILING IN EVERYTHING BUT JOKING”

YOU AND YOUR VP HAVE TO TAKE THE ECONOMY MORE SERIOUSLY!

* * * * * *

OBAMA HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TELL YOU “MAN, YOU’RE NOT THE LAW OF THE LAND.”

YOU NEED TO BE “A LEADER NOT AN ORGANIZER”

SHAME ON YOU FOR CHALLENGING MEMBERS OF THE SUPREME COURT – IT’S UNCONSTITUTIONAL

* * * * * *

MR. PRESIDENT “YOU COULD BE LOSING YOUR RESIDENCE”

MITT ROMNEY MAY BE OUR NEXT PRESIDENT

* * * * * *

JOB CREATION STAGNATION

AS OBAMA’S APPROVAL RATING IS FADING HE’S “JOHNNY COME LATELY” WITH JOB CREATION AND THE ECONOMY

* * * * * *

OBAMA A GRADUATE OF HARVARD IS A DUMMY WHEN IT COMES TO AMERICAN HISTORY

* * * * * *

PRESIDENT OBAMA SAYS “THINGS COULD BE WORSE”

HECK!  IT CERTAINLY WOULD BE IF YOU’RE RE-ELECTED

“I DESERVE A “SECOND TERM”

NOT IF WE CAN HELP IT!

* * * * * *

HE’S NOT ON OUR TEAM – THIS IS HIS AMERICAN DREAM

OBAMA’S PRISON

“VISION FOR RADICALISM & SOCIALISM”

FROM OBAMA’S PASTOR JEREMIAH WRIGHT WITH WHITE-RADICAL VIEWS TO FORMER UNDERGROUND WEATHERMAN, WILLIAM AYERS TO DERRICK BELL, FIRST AFRICAN-AMERICAN PROFESSOR OF LAW AT HARVARD UNIVERSITY AND CRITICAL RACE THEORY TO JUSTICE DEPT.  LEGAL COUNSEL DAWN JOHNSEN’S PRO-ABORTION VIEWS AND OPPOSITION TO BUSH ADMINISTRATION TERRORISM POLICIES

* * * * * *

WHO IS PRESIDENT OBAMA FOOLING?

“THE ECONOMY IS RECOVERING”

NOT WITH GAS PRICES CLOSE TO $5.00 A GALLON

AMERICANS ARE SUFFERING ACROSS THE NATION

YET YOUR WIFE MICHELLE IS WEARING $6,000 GOWN DESIGNED BY MARCHESA

AND

“THIS IS JUST NUTS”

TAXPAYERS SHELL OUT $20,000 A WEEK SO DEFENSE SECRETARY LEON PANETTA CAN TAKE A MILITARY PLANE TO VISIT FAMILY AND TAKE CARE OF HIS WALNUT FARM IN MONTEREY, CALIFORNIA

PANETTA’S EXCURSION TRIPS ARE MORE THAN “GSA LAS VEGAS RESORT SCANDAL” A HARD PILL FOR TAXPAYERS TO SWALLOW AS OBAMA ADMINISTRATION IS CALLING FOR DEEP CUTS IN DEFENSE SPENDING WHEN OUR COUNTRY NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED AGAINST THESE CRAZY TERRORISTS!

* * * * * *

IT’S DAMN HARD TO GET A JOB!

ARE YOU CRAZY OBAMA?  AMERICANS ARE NOT “LAZY”

OBAMA SAYS “COLLEGE IS KNOWLEDGE”

IT WOULD BE A TREMENDOUS BLOW IF THE FEDERAL STUDENT LOAN RATE DOUBLES

STUDENTS ARE ALREADY IN TROUBLE AS THE U.S. EDUCATION DEBT HAS RISEN TO $1 TRILLION

* * * * * *

MILLIONAIRES’ PAYDAY

NOW OBAMA IS CALLING FOR HIGHER TAXES ON MILLIONAIRES.  IS THIS REALLY FAIR SINCE IT TARGETS SMALL BUSINESS OWNERS WHO ARE TRYING TO MAKE A PROFIT IN A BAD ECONOMY AND DO THE HIRING?

* * * * * *

MIDDLE CLASS TRASHED – INCOME 10% LESS

MORE THAN 14 MILLION PEOPLE DEPEND ON FOOD STAMPS UNDER OBAMA’S PRESIDENCY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HISTORY

OBAMA SURPASSES BUSH’S DEBT CEILING BY $5 TRILLION

OBAMA AND JOE BIDEN BACKED JON CORZINE’S “MF GLOBAL” WHO IS NOW UNDER INVESTIGATION BY THE JUSTICE DEPT.

GREEN ENERGY COMPANIES LIKE “SOLYNDRA” THAT GOT GOVERNMENT MONEY FROM OBAMA ARE IN BANKRUPTCY AND GIVING BONUSES TO THEIR EMPLOYEES

NOW OBAMA IS TOURING THE COUNTRY TRYING TO PROMOTE SOLAR ENERGY

DO WE WANT MORE OF “OBAMA THE LOST CAUSE?”

* * * * * *

NOT APPROVING CANADIAN KEYSTONE PIPELINE PUSH GAS PRICES TO AN ALL TIME HIGH!

OBAMA’S SOLUTION: BUY FUEL-EFFICIENT TRUCKS & CARS

$132 BILLION IN BAILOUTS TO BANKS, WALL STREET AND AUTO INDUSTRY ON THE BACKS OF TAXPAYERS

FEDERAL WORKERS OWE $1 BILLION IN TAX MONEY AND YOUR RAISING THEIR SALARIES?

OBAMACARE LEGISLATES A MANDATE THAT EVERY AMERICAN CITIZEN MUST PURCHASE HEALTH CARE OR ELSE GET PENALIZED IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL

OBAMA ADMINISTRATION HEALTH CARE “CONTRACEPTION” LAW “WAR AGAINST RELIGION” HAS CATHOLIC COLLEGES ANGRY

IT’S A CONSTITUTIONAL ISSUE

PRES. OBAMA REVERSES MANDATE ON CONTRACEPTION FOR HEALTH INSURANCE COMPANIES TO PAY NOT CATHOLIC INSTITUTIONS

OBAMA REQUIRES INSURANCE COMPANIES TO PROVIDE CONTRACEPTION “FREE OF CHARGE” APPARENTLY ONLY TO PEOPLE BUYING THEIR POLICY – “NOT FREE”

RON PAUL:  GOVERNMENT INFRINGING ON OUR “FIRST AMENDMENT” GUARANTEE OF RELIGIOUS LIBERTY

BISHOPS OBJECT TO OBAMA’S CONTRACEPTION

“HOLY CROSS VS. BLUE CROSS”

STRAW POLL “PUBIC COMMUNITY” BACK OBAMA FOR BIRTH CONTROL

OBAMA NOT FOR SUPER PACS – NOW FOR SUPER PACS

THESE ARE JUST SOME OF OBAMA’S “FLIP-FLOP” POLICIES

AND HE CRITICIZES ROMNEY

* * * * * *

THINK THIS PRESIDENT IS UN-AMERICAN

WHAT ARE WE IN FOR IF OBAMA IS RE-ELECTED AGAIN?

“GOOD TALKER/ORGANIZER – NOT A LEADER”

HE CAN ALWAYS “WING IT” AS A SINGER

OR

GET A TALK SHOW – “POLITICAL JOKER”

* * * * * *

OBAMA SAYS “WE CAN’T WAIT FOR CONGRESS TO ACT”

THE AMERICAN PEOPLE HAVE TAKEN ENOUGH OF YOUR CRAP!

* * * * * *

A PRESIDENT WITH MORE FUNDRAISERS THAN ANY OTHER PRESIDENT IN HISTORY

* * * * * *

WE’RE TIRED OF THE “BUSH BLAME GAME”

OBAMA!  YOU NEED TO BE IN WASHINGTON WORKING NOT  CAMPAIGNING, FUNDRAISING, VACATIONING, GOLFING AND USING TAXPAYERS’ MONEY TO TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD IN AIR FORCE ONE

* * * * * *

OBAMA YOU’VE CHARMED US LONG ENOUGH!

NOW WHEN ARE WE GOING TO SEE ALL THAT GOOD STUFF YOU PROMISED US?

Lyrics created by (Francke) the Yankee

“Witty Shit”

for the poor and rich

Rights Reserved

2012

Put your two cents in – Dollars are scare nowadays: Should Obama be re-elected? Yes/No Opinion/Comments

Politics, politics got its tricks.  Every four years our government needs to fix their bad politics.  Some folks feel religion and politics don’t mix.  Who can understand these government plans?  They’re forever changing the tax codes while we taxpayers get a bigger and bigger load.

Things the “Average Joe” does not know.  Federal employees owe billions in back taxes. Washington politicians including House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi are making a lot of dough from insider trading (IPO) while an American citizen can be put in jail for violating the laws of the Securities Exchange Commission.  Politicians are robbing the system.  President Obama addresses “insider trading” legislation during “State of the Union.”

In 2011 bill went before House Representatives prohibiting Members of Congress including thousands of senior federal employees from using non-public information for insider trading.  Republican-written bill passed the House, but tossed aside was a specific provision aimed at those who pry financial information from Members of Congress and sell it to hedge funds and investment firms on greedy Wall Street.  Supporters of tougher regulation are still working on legislation. Main passage of bill was the fear in an election year.

On March 22, 2012 due to the efforts of New York Democratic Congresswoman Louise Slaughter and Minnesota Democratic Congressman Tim Walz’ legislation Senate passed “Stock Act” unanimously by a 96-to-3 vote curbing Members of Congress and senior federal employees from insider trading.  If any Member of Congress or senior federal employee is caught committing insider trading he or she will forfeit their pension.  New law goes to President Obama for signature.

It’s doubtful the SEC with limited funding would go after “catch me if you can” powerful lawmakers for insider trading when employees are wasting taxpayers’ money watching pornography.

Now to another discussion on whether or not Members of Congress should get their pay cut if they don’t pass a budget.  Congress has missed so many deadlines over the years no one takes it seriously and has affected U.S. credit rating.

In addition to these sick political tricks, this time government employees are not getting away with it.  On Monday, April 10th the (GSA) General Services Administration, a federal agency with over 12,000 workers put an “8th” employee on administrative leave.  An investigation into an October 2010 4-day training conference at a Vegas resort where $823,000 an outrageous amount was spent by government employees on the backs of taxpayers.  One video shows latest official David Foley Deputy Commissioner of the Public Buildings Service who was placed on leave presenting an award to an employee performing a “rap song” bragging about lavish spending.  A top official head of GSA Martha Johnson resigned and two others were fired while five other officials were put on administrative leave.   Jeffrey Neely a Western Regional Commissioner invoked his “Fifth Amendment” right to remain silent is on administrative leave over his role for organizing the $820,000 spending spree.  There will be at least four congressional hearings.  Now you can see what one government agency is doing with our taxpayers’ money.

This is far from over as more culprits are caught cheating erupting on the heels of the most embarrassing GSA Las Vegas “training conference” scandal.  James Woosley, 48-year-old former head of Intelligence for Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) a department under Homeland Security faked hotel receipts for more than a dozen trips and helped other ICE employees who stayed at his Virginia home when traveling to Washington to do the same thing in exchange for “kickbacks” including his personal assistant, Latheisa Rollerson with whom he developed a close relationship working, traveling  and living together.  They say Woosley used $5,000 of taxpayers’ money to purchase a boat and nearly $15,000 for a real estate investment abusing his position.  The high-ranking Homeland Security official along with Rollerson and three others have also plead “guilty” to travel fraud scheme that defrauded taxpayers out of $600,000.  Woosley who faces from 18-27 months in prison and a fine has agreed to forfeit the stolen money.

In case you didn’t know Chicago Congressman Bobby Rush along with 82 other lawmakers are being criticized for using taxpayers’ money on luxury car leases.  Rush pays at least $1,000 a month on a Lexus Hybrid.  House rules let lawmakers spend up to $1,400 a month on a car lease, but U.S. Senate has outlawed the practice.

Let’s not forget other important issues like Social Security.  Is it on the road to recovery?  Wonder what new benefits or cuts we’ll see.  Money got you up a tree?  Nothing in this life is free.  Pretty soon all of us will be paying for the air we breathe.

Bet you didn’t know that when our Senators and Congresswomen retire until their demise they continue to draw the same federal pay.  There’s even more retirement pay in their cost-of-living raise.  They don’t have to worry about Social Security.

This brings us to the next phase.  Did you know that the Senators’ wives get a damn nice pay raise?  They’re not even on the payroll and receiving a big chunk of dough.  We as American taxpayers foot the bill all the way to Capitol Hill.  Does this make you feel ill?  Well, it’s sure a hard pill to swallow.  Makes you want to wallow.

Now let’s get down to the old mighty dollar.  There are still more government jobs than the rest of us slobs.  Private industry is not hiring and government is trying to cut deficit spending.  President Obama worrying about the rotten economy put a two-year pay freeze on millions of federal employees, but what about his cronies who are full of baloney?  Now Obama says the economy is recovering so he’s giving federal employees a pay raise.

Well, let’s look into the next phase. Obama administration on entitlement programs.  We’ve seen what happened to Greece and how they ran out of money.  More government spending and intervention will stifle the U.S. economy.

Government has raised the Social Security retirement age, but by that time we might all be in our graves.  Taxpayers need to be saved while others are thinking of leaving to live in some foreign country.  Look at the co-owner of Facebook.  He’s giving up his citizenship.

Sick politics got its tricks.  Our tax codes can use a real good fix.  Is Social Security on the road to recovery?  Wonder what new benefits or cuts we’ll see.  Money got you up a tree?  Nothing in this life is free.  Pretty soon all of us will be paying for the air we breathe.

Jobs and manufacturing have gone overseas. China now owns the debt of our country.  More Americans are in poverty living off of food stamps to buy groceries.  What’s the President and his administration doing about the high price of gasoline?  Take away tax breaks from oil companies, but will Republicans and Democrats agree?

If this isn’t enough of the bad stuff, politicians newest trick is “SOPA” getting into the Internet.  They call it protecting us.  The reality is having our personal lives messed up.  Hate to think of what’s next.

Hey you Republicans and Democrats get your act on the right track.  We’ve had enough of your crap!

© Copyright 2011 – 2012

Created by (Francke) the Lyrical Yankee

Political Bullshit

All Rights Reserved

Since the 2004 great debate how will you rate each candidate?  Some people felt that Bush was a pain in the tush while others viewed Kerry as more astute and quite merry.  Kerry got whipped by Bush because he flopped and flipped.  Then along came John McCain who tried to beat Obama the charmer, but it was too late for the lame duck candidate.

We’re still in the same old political game of power and fame, but this time around it’s Tea Party Express to the rescue and probably Sarah Palin’s “2012″ presidential campaign.  Will the lady give up her big bucks and political views on Fox News?

Palin is salin’ with her new Alaska documentary series on TLC bringing in 5 million viewers.  Sarah is a smart cookie.  She knows the American people will get hooked on her latest family values book, “America by Heart.”  She’s pitchin’ for millions.

The GOP wants Palin to run for President, but the Tea Party hopes she’ll be Chairwoman of the Republican National Committee.  In the meantime Michael Steele wheels and deals hoping to keep his RNC seat.  The controversial Steele is voted out and Wisconsin’s state party chairman, Reince Priebus is in like Flynn.  Priebus’ new leadership will lead the RNC to victory.  Priebus reels in $3.5 million in his first two weeks as RNC’s new chairman repairing donor relationships that fell apart at the seams under Michael Steele.

There’s always a new twist in politics.  Ex-RNC Chief Michael Steele kicks off a neat deal as an MSNBC analyst.

Former President George H.W. Bush is not sure what the tea party stands for.  Barbara Bush’s remarks were somewhat cruel by stating “Thought Palin was beautiful and thinks she’s very happy in Alaska and should stay there.”

Sarah Palin cancels the Alaska TV series so it does not conflict with her possible run for the presidency.  Maybe Palin’s views have boost Fox News, but her approval rating as a presidential candidate seem to be fading.

Palin is visiting Israel and India to improve America’s future relationship which hinge upon her running for the presidency.  She’s not happy actress Julianne Moore is portraying her in an HBO movie “Game Change.”

According to new voter polls for the “2012″ presidential election Obama’s charm has bombed.  His legacy will be the end of America’s democracy.  Vote to end government bureaucracy.  ObamaCare has turned into ObamaScare.  Beware! “2012″ budget is the year that Obama intends to spend millions of dollars from your tax money for 1,054 IRS agents to enforce health care.  Obama says he’s flexible on the health care bill while millions of Americans are not thrilled.

Federal Judge Vinson of Florida rules the individual mandate is unconstitutional.  Judge Vinson remarks on Senator Obama’s “2008″ campaign that health care reform would not include an individual mandate.  President Obama feels health care should not be repealed.  The battle has just begun in Washington.  By 47-51 votes Senate Democrats defeated Republicans.  Federal judge’s decision will probably head to the United States Supreme Court for review on whether or not the health care bill is unconstitutional.  The GOP intends to stop health care funding.  They feel the health care bill in the spring of “2013″ will be repealed.  Obama appeals Judge Vinson’s ruling that the government does not have authority to mandate that people purchase health care insurance policies.

In light of the Tucson, Arizona shootings and President Obama’s speech to victims and heroes of this terrible tragedy, his overall approval rating has reached its highest peak.

The President’s “State of the Union” speech is a repeat.  It seems to be the same old stuff.  Nothing new – Nothing much.

Bachman Rocks!  Political Fashionista Michele Bachmann, Minnesota congresswoman and founder of the Tea Party Caucus who is considering running for the “2012″ presidency lashes out on Obama’s speech and weak policies.  Bachmann is also against First Lady, Michelle Obama’s ideas on obesity.  The lovely congresswoman will decide this summer on whether or not she’ll toss her hat into the ring.

Rep. Paul Ryan of Wisconsin gives his official GOP statement and budgetary guidelines to privatizing Medicare and Social Security.  Ryan seems to be flyin’ high with his raging change for Medicare and Medicaid.

GOP will likely support former Gov. Mike Huckabee from the great State of Arkansas as their “2012″ presidential candidate, but Huck says he’s not running.  Money is one issue and the other is Huckabee not willing to give up his show on Fox.  Get hooked on Mike’s new book.  He tells it all in “A Simple Government” on the best seller’s list.  Huckabee talks about all kinds of political issues including Obama’s health care and how it will fail miserably.

Newt Gingrich throws his hat into the ring for another shot at the presidency.  Ron Paul, Rick Santorum and former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney set up exploratory committees for their decision to run for the GOP.

Libertarian Ron Paul who stands tall got attacked at CPAC by Donald Trump who said he would be the least likely candidate to win the “2012″ presidency.  Texas Congressman Ron Paul and Gov. Mitch Daniels of Indiana emerged as the only straw poll CPAC winners although the GOP is not likely to select either gentlemen for the presidency.

Donald Trump says he will be running as a conservative Republican for the presidency.  Rep. Allen West, a billionaire real estate magnate who organized the South Florida Tea Party would like to be Trump’s VP.  Donald the fair-haired billionaire is announcing his decision when flowers bloom in June.  This “big wig” signed up for an early mornin’ “Fox” news gig.

Trump shows his official birth certificate in light of the media controversy stating it was “invalid.”  Why can’t Obama do the same thing?  The Donald is investigating President Obama’s official birthplace in Hawaii.  Trump says Obama is definitely the worst President in U.S. history.  Move over Obama – Here comes Donald the blonde charmer.  Comedian Jerry Seinfeld cancels Trump’s appearance for a benefit due to his criticism of Obama’s birth certificate questioning whether or not the President was born in this country.  Donald Trump also offended Robert DeNiro and Rosie O’Donnell with his poorly-conceived focus on Obama’s birth certificate and schooling.

White House adviser David Plouffe says Donald Trump’s pursuit of the President’s birth certificate is a just a bunch of ranting antics.  Trump has no chance of winning the presidency.  American people are focused on the economy and our nation’s security.

Donald Trump mocks with racist remarks about Barack Obama’s Ivy League schooling while Obama releases his long-form live birth certificate publicly.  Trump  takes full credit for Obama showing his birth certificate on national TV and the Internet.

Trump’s profanity is alarming at a Las Vegas rally as he laces it into America’s trade with Saudia Arabia, China and other foreign countries.

Midst rioting and looting in the Egyptian streets people shout they want President Hosni Mubarak out.  Power is not Mubarak’s finest hour.  President Obama would like to see a transitional change while Senator John Kerry says it’s time for Hosni Mubarak to end his reign.  Move over Obama here comes Trump the blonde charmer who is not pleased with your Mid-East policies.

Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney praises President Obama for taking a stand telling the Egyptian people that America would like to see a transition to liberty and democracy.  In the meantime we are learning that President Hosni Mubarak and his sons are worth $70 billion with assets in London, Sweden and posh properties in California and New York City.  Hosni made many lucrative investments with oil companies while the Egyptian people were suffering.

President Hosni Mubarak finally steps down and the military takes over the country.  Egyptians celebrate and cheer in Tahrir Square as they’ve won their freedom.  Hosni Mubarak is restricted from leaving the country by an Egyptian official.  All assets belonging to Mubarak and his family are frozen in Egypt and other foreign countries.

Egyptian protesters demand authorities prosecute ousted 83-year-old ruler for 30 years, President Hosni Mubarak, his two sons and other officials for crimes against their people.  Meantime Hosni Mubarak has been hospitalized in Amman, Jordan after reportedly suffering from a heart attack.  Still weak and ill Egyptian authorities transport Hosni Mubarak to Cairo’s prison hospital.

Egypt will be charging Hosni Mubarak and his sons for the death of thousands of protesters.  Trial begins August 3rd when testimony will be heard.  Attorney for Hosni Mubarak says he’s “not guilty.”  His lawyer announces that Mubarak has stomach cancer.  He may not be able to attend trial as the former Egyptian President is in custody at a hospital near the Red Sea.

Mubarak is seen in a hospital bed surrounded by a barb-wired cage standing trial in Cairo on charges of corruption and killing 900 protesters which he declares “I’m not guilty.”  Riots in Cairo since Mubarak’s regime was toppled and dictator’s arrest for crimes against humanity.  Egyptians seeking Hosni Mubarak’s prosecution by hanging.

There’s chaos and disorder in Libya as thousands of people flee crossing into the Egyptian border.  Libyan leader Colonel Moammar Gadhafi four-decade rule is in jeopardy as anti-protesters are revolting.  Gadhafi and his son vow they will go down fighting.  Dictators are defeated for how inhuman they treated their people.  When things turn sour power is not Gadhafi’s finest hour.

Daffy Gadhafi tells the people be happy, go dancing, love me.  No wonder why thousands of people are fleeing to nearby countries.  Gadhafi’s aircraft bomb and harm people escaping to Tunisia and Egypt.

Libyan ambassador gets emotional at the United Nations opposing Gadhafi regime’s fighting and killing  the people of his country.

President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton condemn the violence and killing of innocent people.  The President sends Clinton to Geneva for international discussions on Libya.  Obama is conferring with Prime Minister of London and the President of France on Libyan strategy as millions of American workers flee for their safety.

On Thursday, February 24th in view of the latest controversy in Libya,  Switzerland’s government orders an immediate freeze of all assets belonging to Libyan leader Colonel Moammar Gadhafi including high-ranking officials and members of his family.  There is the possibility that Gadhafi stashed cash in U.S. banks totaling $32 billion, but so far the information lacks authenticity. Funds in oil revenues estimated at around $70 billion belonging to the Libyan government may be frozen by the United States and European countries.

On Friday, February 25th Obama orders sanctions against the Libyan government freezing $30 billion of Moammar Gadhafi and his family assets, the largest in history.

U.N. Security Council passes resolution imposing sanctions against the Libyan government for attacking and killing its people with a travel ban and arms embargo while foreign countries close their embassies.  Senator McCain wants Obama to be rough, ready and tough.  Obama administration is moving cautiously in light of the humanitarian catastrophe.

Israel joins international community on sanctions for Iran.  Brits make a stand and freeze Libyan dictator’s assets and members of his clan.

Israeli Prime Minister lays out terms of peace settlement with Palestinians.  Prime Minister approves 227 new homes in West Bank settlement.

U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton says America is reaching out to Libyan rebels in their fight against Gadhafi.  Senators are against giving protesters ammunition.  The United States is cutting their ties with the Libyan embassy while Hillary Clinton will be meeting with rebel leaders.  Chairman of Homeland Security Senator Joe Lieberman says the United States together with its allies should arm Libyan rebels not knowing for sure who they are because Gadhafi’s soldiers will definitely continue to slaughter innocent  people.

Former President Bill Clinton’s suggestion is that Libyan rebels should be given ammunition.

Special session of United Nations General Assembly strips Libyan membership in the U.N. Human Rights Council by unanimous resolution.

Daffy Gadhafi launches air strikes as rebels continue to fight.  Gas and food prices spike.  Disturbed by the surmounting Libyan turmoil Obama is seriously thinking of tapping into America’s oil reserves.

Feisty Gadhafi issues rewards for the capture of Minister of Justice and rebel leader.  As Gadhafi is winning he tells rebels to either stay and experience the consequences or run away.

Gadhafi issues “no-fly” warning!  The Arab league unanimously agrees to a “no-fly zone” over North African country with the exception of Syria and Algeria. Britain and France stand alone for “no-fly zone.”  More Americans favor “no-fly zone” than root going into Libya with ground troops.

Finally U.N. Security Council unanimously passes “no-fly” zone against Gadhafi’s military.   The only country not participating is Germany.

U. S. might use air strikes, but not ground forces against Gadhafi’s military who are overpowering rebels fighting for democracy.

Gadhafi defies France’s military planes patrolling Libya’s airspace.  The fate of the Libyan people is in the hands of the international community vowed to fight for their freedom and democracy.

The United States, France and Britain launch 112 Tomahawk cruise missiles disabling Gadhafi’s army. Mission operation “Odyssey Dawn” – Soon Gadhafi will be gone.  Round by round missiles hit Gadhafi’s Tripoli compound.

Gadhafi claims victory as the international community continues bombing his Libyan army.

NATO forces and its allies have taken charge and are now fighting the Libyan army. America’s cruise missiles continue to pound Colonel Gadhafi’s regime in the battle of Tripoli.  Rebels celebrate as they takeover two cities from Gadhafi’s army.

Moammar Gadhafi sends plea letter to Obama asking NATO to stop bombing.

The decision to arm Libyan rebels is still being discussed by NATO and the U.S. Gadhafi’s allies defect while the dictator continues to shell defenseless rebels.

Defense Secretary Robert Gates says Arab nations need to address democratic reform due to the instability in Muslim countries.

Speaker of the House John Boehner criticizes President Obama’s controversial Libyan mission.

Rebels manage to takeover the cities of Benghazi and Ajdabiya while Gadhafi asks for a cease firing.  Dictator may be looking for a way to exit the country or leave Tripoli.

Libyan rebels seize City of Misrata forcing out Gadhafi’s army.  NATO forces strike Gadhafi’s building in Tripoli.  Gadhafi insists he is not surrendering.  He’s seen on TV playing chess and enjoying his surroundings.

Yemen’s President Saleh is stepping down in exchange for immunity although deal will not end protesting.  President Saleh badly injured from an attack on his palace seeks help from the Saudis.  Worn-torn Yemeni protesters are on the brink of civil war.

U.S. considering sanctions against Syria for brutally killing and torturing children with citizens protesting their regime.

Obama and EU calling for Syrian President and Regional Secretary of Ba’ath Party, Bashar al-Assad to step aside.

Goodwill International Ambassador Angelina Jolie goes to Turkey to meet with Syrian refugees who fled for safety.

Obama and Senator John McCain are definitely against sending ground troops into Libya in light of Gadhafi’s continuous bombing, but will send armed drones to defend the rebels.  Senator McCain lands in Benghazi to help rebels fighting Gadhafi.  McCain warns the longer we wait al-Qaeda could takeover Libya.

Gadhafi’s son says the regime will never surrender.  They will not stop fighting and bombing.

Moammar Gadhafi pleads over Libyan national TV for NATO to cease firing.  NATO forces continue bombing Tripoli.

Libyan Leader survives air attack on Tripoli house that allegedly killed his youngest son, Saif al-Arab and his three grandchildren which NATO denies targeting Gadhafi.  Libyan people are protesting the killings.

Migrants desperate to flee the fighting in Libyan City of Misrata are heading for Benghazi.  More drone attacks will lead to civilian casualties than killing Gadhafi’s forces.  NATO’s mission is to prevent attacks against civilians while trying to kill Gadhafi and his army.

International Criminal Court issues arrest warrant for Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi, including his son and intelligence chief for vicious against humanity.

Rebels with NATO inside Tripoli put squeeze on Gadhafi and his army.  Gadhafi’s sons have not been captured and arrested by revolutionary army, but their daffy daddy has gone into hiding.

Rebels leaving compound with ammo and treasures that once belonged to Gadhafi.  Where Moammar Gadhafi once sought shelter the rebels have taken over.  Celebrations in the streets as Gadhafi and his army are defeated.  Rebels will not negotiate with Gadhafi’s regime.  Gadhafi’s family flee the country.  Libyan rebels want Gadhafi’s wife and children back after they flee to Algeria.  Rebels capture Libya’s Prime Minister.

Libyan rebels surround desert town of Bani Walid where Gadhafi regime intend to go on fighting.

The U.S. will not tie up Libyan aid due to case of Lockerbie bomber.

Since the Egyptian uprising more mid-east countries from Jordan, Algeria, Tunisia, Yemen, Syria, Libya and Bahrain have been protesting.

Syrians fleeing to Turkey due to violent killing.  Saudi women are fighting for their rights.

President Obama lends a hand to Japan after millions of people are displaced by a horrific tsunami and earthquake.

Donald Trump takes a stand on Obama’s oil drilling ban in light of Japan’s disaster.  He also criticizes Obama’s golfing in view of the ongoing nuclear issues.

Libyan rebels to get $25 million from Gadhafi’s frozen assets seized by U.S. NATO forces planning to stay in Libya to win the war against Gadhafi and his army.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is touring Cairo’s Tahrir Square and Tunisia for democratic reform.

Hillary Clinton announces that she is not planning to run for any office including the “2016″ presidency.

Pop stars that performed at Gadhafi’s functions and received millions in compensation are giving their money to charities.

Getting back to our failing economy, President Obama compromised on his campaign promise and seals a deal with Republicans on a two-year tax extension for middle and upper class Americans.  Harry Reid and Senate Democrats take a stand to put it in the trash can.  Obama gets Bill Clinton to give Dems a shpeel on tax-cut deal.  At last it’s passed.

The Dream Act is back on the table, but it does not look very stable for the bill to pass on Capitol Hill.  Senator McCain states that in order to approve this legislation every American demands that our federal government fulfill its Constitutional duties by securing our borders.

GOP slams sweetheart “earmarks” of the trillion-dollar spending bill on Capitol Hill.  Dems kill the bill.  The American people will not stand for wasteful programs.

At last, the $858 billion two-year tax-cut extension for middle and upper class Americans which includes unemployment benefits has been passed not scrapped.  President Obama gives it his official seal of approval.

Former governor of Massachusetts Mitt Romney feels there’s no hope under present administration for creating lasting economic growth.  While consumers might be spending the job fix is a gloomy picture.  He’s appalled by Obama’s health care plan saying it’s not a “one size fits all.”

Here comes Rand Paul, the newly-elected fireball and Tea Party Senator from Kentucky.  Paul is targeting President Obama’s runaway spending and clean-energy policies.

While President Obama vows deep federal budget cuts for 2012 of $3.7 trillion beginning October 1, 2011 with a projected deficit of $1.1 trillion and to work with the GOP, he is now proposing State-by-State jobless benefits for short-term relief.  The GOP stands tough on an immediate $100 billion in budget cuts.

President Obama yearns for another term in the White House as he tells the nation his plan is for job creation and education while he defends education budget cuts.  Obama’s “2012″ budget to include funding schools for bullying.

The U.S. House of Representatives vote to defund Obama’s health care law.  What’s in store for entitlement programs like Medicaid, Medicare and Social Security?  House passes $1.2 trillion-dollar spending bill funding government while slashing more than $61 billion.  The bill now goes before the Senate for approval.  Cuts in domestic programs and foreign aid are on the table.  House panel will initiate a bill to end Obama’s home foreclosure program millions rely on.  Freddie Mae and Freddie Mac maybe on the chopping block.

Sarah Palin weighs in on a government shutdown versus federal spending.  She still hasn’t decided if she’s running for the presidency.  Sarah says, big spenders there’s no more money to lend.  We need to be debt free.  Democrats approve GOP’s two-week spending bill avoiding government shutdown.  White House agrees to an additional $6.5 billion in budget cuts, but the GOP says it’s enough.  Obama appeals for congressional budget deal.  Senators look for new ways to cut the budget.  Republicans are still mulling over short-term funding bill.

Latest news from Capitol Hill is that Obama signed the bill for a three-week budget until April 8th when senators will have to go back to the table and face another debate.  Late night White House “coffee klatch” with Obama, Senator Harry Reid of Nevada and House Speaker John Boehner discussing budget cuts.  Democrats and Republicans stop bickering avoiding a government shutdown by agreeing to $38.5 billion in spending cuts through the end of September.  Congresswoman Bachman and Tea Party are not happy with budget cuts.  Democrats and GOP have not cut back enough to satisfy the crippling national debt affecting our country.

As states continue their budget battle to shutdown schools, layoff teachers and curb union bargaining, Obama says he will not interfere in the fight for workers’ rights.

President Obama wants gun control overhauled due to ongoing violence in our American society.

Barack with Michelle Obama and family visiting Central and South America countries to strengthen relationships in the international community.  Obama pledges $200 million to El Salvador fighting street gangs and drug trafficking.

President Obama cuts his trip short due to ongoing economic policies in Washington.  He’s ending America’s involvement in Libya leaving it up to our allies fighting Gadhafi.

Some foreign leaders want Obama to give the Nobel Peace Prize back since he ordered the Libyan attack.  Obama stated that America’s military action comes under an official mandate of the United Nations Security Council to save Libya not to invade their country from a dictator that wants to kill his own people.

President Obama sets his re-election slogan campaign into motion, “It  Begins With Us.”  Can the American people trust Obama’s policies to lead the country out of a sluggish economy?

Obama appears at Facebook Town Hall and other meetings across the country promoting his re-election for the presidency. Hollywood celebrities are rallying for Obama’s re-election.  Meanwhile Obama disagrees with the GOP’s Medicare plan saying it is radical and unfair.  Most Americans oppose Medicare cuts even if it would balance the budget.

White House administration sets up fraudulent task force for Attorney General’s office to probe gas gouging.  Obama wants to end tax breaks for oil companies.

President Obama fundraising in NYC.  He’s preparing to appoint a new security team.

Senate and House questioning Apple’s ipad and iphone hidden tracking privacy policies.

Can Trump steal Bachman’s appeal from the smarty tea party?  The Donald a top pick on polled voter list skipping Mike Huckabee is second in line to former Gov. Mitt Romney.  Meanwhile Trump and Sarah Palin head to Tea Party rallies around the country.  In New Hampshire when Donald Trump speaks the crowd listens as he vows to save America stating if he runs he will win and make this country great again, rich again, respected again.

This time around Obama is the winner as he throws zingers at Donald Trump during White House Correspondents’ annual dinner.  Obama shows his “live birth” video.  Trump was poked by Obama and Seth Meyers of “SNL” (Saturday Night Live) by a stream of jokes.

Hooray for the USA!  The dreaded one (Osama bin Laden) is dead. U.S. Navy SEAL Team Six shot him in the chest and head.  Will this end the war in Afghanistan? Pakistan intelligence agency admits its failure to catch al-Qaeda leader.

Senator John McCain says there was no “Gitmo” torture.

President’s grandma, 88-year-old Sarah Hussein Obama who lives in Kenya is threatened by African Al-Qaeda.  As a precautionary measure the government has provided her with police security.

The Obama administration wants to give more than $30 billion of Gadhafi’s frozen assets to the rebels.

President Obama greets “Wounded Warriors” at White House with a special speech.

Obama stands strong on immigration reform, but Republicans warn Democrats it’s not the right time due to border security issues.

House Republicans are still fighting to stop funding health care reform bill.  Three Democratic judge panel for the U.S. Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals chosen at random could rule that Congress has the power over people’s decision to avoid purchasing health insurance policies and requiring most Americans to obtain insurance or pay a penalty.  One judge raised the issue that Congress has been involved for decades in Medicare and Medicaid.  Congress’ power over regulated interstate commerce could be resolved by this summer as well as an appeal from the losing side could be heard sometime in October.

Former Gov. Mitt Romney defends his “Romneycare vs. Obamacare” stating there’s a difference between his mandatory Massachusetts state plan and Obama’s national health insurance across the land.  Critics are still pessimistic.  Some states claim health care reform is wrong and are opting out of the mandate.  Sarah Palin and other conservative contenders for the presidency slam former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and the Obama administration after huge numbers of state waivers on healthcare reform law come from businesses in Pelosi’s northern California district.

At a Senate hearing oil execs defend price hikes and suggest tax credits.

In response to America’s frustration on rising gas prices Obama is plugging for more domestic oil drilling in the Gulf of Mexico and Alaska.

Delegation from the Libyan National Council fighting Gadhafi will visit the White House and meet with President Obama’s administration.

The Donald might have taken some lumps from Obama, but he’s far from being stumped.  Trump has decided not to pursue the Republican presidency, but instead he’ll be hosting two more seasons of Celebrity Apprentice.  His relentless passion is business.  Donald Trump will be supporting the candidate most qualified to help tackle the utmost important issues and challenges of the oval office to get our country back on track.

Democrats and GOP not backing energy policies or oil drilling.

New York Representative/Homeland Security Chairman Peter King leaving the door open on possibly he’ll be running for the “2012″ presidency.

Multimillionaire businessman Herman Cain, the CEO man who ran Godfather’s Pizza, a political activist, columnist, former radio talk show host from the great State of Georgia and tea party favorite throws his hat into the “2012″ GOP arena.  Tim Pawlenty Minnesota’s former governor says he will make America a better country for you and me is now running for the Republican presidency.

On May 22nd, President Obama and wife Michelle board Air Force One heading for a six-day, four-nation delegation (from Ireland, England, France to Poland) European tour stopping in the little rural town of Moneygall, Ireland where his great-grandfather, Fulmouth Kearney lived before immigrating to America in 1850.  Then on Sunday, May 29th the President pays his respects at a memorial service in tornado stricken Joplin, Missouri.

On Sunday, May 29th Saudi Arabia’s Prince Al-Waleed bin Talal in a CNN news statement tries to convince the U.S. and Europe not to look for new or cheaper oil supplies.  He would like to see a barrel of oil between $70 and $80 instead of the current price of more than $100.  The Saudi Prince refers to the continuing mideast uprisings and disruption of supplies as the reason for soaring crude prices.

Sarah Palin begins the Memorial Day weekend with a bus tour along the east coast to historical sites which might be a step in the right direction for the 2012 GOP presidential election.

Palin and Trump meet at a famous pizzeria in midtown and sit down for a political pow-wow.

Sarah Palin touring some more historical sites in Romney’s hometown criticized his Massachusetts health care law as the former governor announced he’ll be running for the 2012 GOP presidency.  While Americans fear an economic meltdown and Wall Street’s warning of a double-dip recession with high unemployment and a gloomy housing industry it looks like Mitt Romney will be the best candidate to beat Obama for the presidency.

Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee says he is still open for the presidential run.  Former Republican Senator Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania announces he’s running for the “2012″ presidency.

It’s bad news for Newt Gingrich as his dream team gives him the boot after he returns from a two-week Mediterranean cruise.

Former NYC Mayor Rudy Giuliani considering running for the “2012″ GOP presidency.

Leader of the Tea Party Michele Bachmann appoints Ed Rollins as her campaign consultant.

Over “Father’s Day” weekend President Obama and House Speaker John Boehner will be relaxing and golfing in Washington, D.C. Is this a “golf” or “debit” summit?

On Monday, June 13th New Hampshire political debate between seven Republican presidential candidates.  Voters polled throughout the country show Mitt Romney and Michele Bachmann as their favorite nominees to win the presidency.

Presidential candidate Tim Pawlenty who was not that great in the debate tried to insinuate that Romney’s Massachusetts health plan compared to Obamacare phrasing “ObamneyCare” determined to undermine Mitt Romney’s candidacy.  CNN commentator John King asks Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum his view on abortion.  He discusses the issue, but misses the perfect opportunity t0 take a stand against Mitt Romney.  A few days later Santorum puts on his punching gloves attacking Romney for not signing an anti-abortion pledge while referring to Rep. Michelle Bachmann and presidential candidates Tim Pawlenty, Ron Paul and Newt Gingrich who did.  Romney strikes back at Santorum’s attack stating he is for the pro-abortion cause, but did not want to sign the pledge because if elected President there might be some controversy.

On Tuesday, June 14th “Flag Day” Tea Party Representative Michele Bachmann says she will be running for the presidency.  Jon Huntsman a former Utah governor and Obama’s first Ambassador to China announced on Tuesday, June 21st that he’s running for the presidency and the only candidate with experience in foreign policy.

Is Sarah Palin a two-time loser?  Republicans think so.  After McCain losing “2008″ with Palin as his VP candidate to Barack Obama, Republicans don’t think she can beat him in the “2012″ presidential election.

Palin follows Bachmann’s tea party trail to Iowa while plugging her new documentary.  Is her film “The Undefeated” a platform campaign as a potential candidate for the GOP presidency?

Fellow constituents criticize Texas Gov. Rick Perry for scheduling a special “Prayer Breakfast” on August 6th.  They say it’s a political presidential move, but all the governor wants to do is devote the day for prayer and fasting for a nation that is suffering.

After pressure from Republican and Democrat congressional members Anthony Weiner a representative of New York’s Queens district making a salary of $174,000 a year resigns over “lewd” naked pics he posted on the Internet.

The U.S. economy seems to be tanking as unemployment rises to 9.1%, retail sales are lagging and the housing industry is tugging along, but President Obama sees America’s businesses growing with more job opportunities.  It’s hard to convince people with food and gas prices going up who are still looking for jobs.

Obama visiting a Toledo, Ohio jeep plant says auto industry helped to grow the economy claims victory for his presidential re-election.  Meanwhile after praising saving jobs at this auto plant and Chet’s local Restaurant, the eatery goes out of business after 70 years.  Fear of economic recovery is going nowhere with people not spending and the lousy job market including bank foreclosures, nationwide businesses are closing.

McDonald’s fast-food chain gained half of all new USA jobs in May even though their employees make low-income salaries.

Congressional house leaders voting to stop funding ending Obama’s Libyan mission while the President does not intend to ax “killer ops” and “drone attacks.”  Obama not complying with “War Powers Act.”

Crowds cheer as President Obama lands on the island making history since JFK visited Puerto Rico some 50 years ago.  Obama is hoping to woo American Hispanic “2012″ voters as unemployment is at 16.5% in the U.S. territory.  The president does not have plans for a suntan or going swimming.

Gallup polls shows any GOP challenger can beat Obama for the presidency.

United States officials, President Karzai, the Taliban and other tribesmen meet in Afghanistan for a remedy to peace.

On Monday, June 20th it’s a six-day trip for Michelle Obama, her family and relatives for an African safari.  She will be meeting with women’s groups addressing the importance of education and youth leadership in today’s environment.  The First Lady will also be honoring the legacy of Nelson Mandela.  This is her first diplomatic visit to stress democracy and a U.S.- South African partnership in spite of their differences regarding foreign policy.

Obama goes which way the wind blows.  With President Obama attending a gay fundraiser in NYC and holding a June 29th Gay Pride reception at the White House he’s now considering endorsing same-sex marriage unions for his re-election.

Speaking of “straw polls” can Texas presidential candidate Ron Paul win them all?  Are his chances slim for the general election?

Democrats do not agree with Obama’s Afghan troop withdrawal strategy.  Presidential GOP candidate Mitt Romney says Obama’s decision should not be based on his political agenda.  Former Massachusetts governor relies on the testimony of our military commanders.

On June 23rd President Obama releases 30 million barrels of oil from U.S. reserves hoping to lower spiking gas prices.

Obama’s clumsy “Medal of Honor” error speaking to troops at upstate New York’s Fort Drum.  The president said winner of the medal was coming home alive when in fact Sgt. 1st Class Jared Monti was killed in action.  Obama’s spokesman did not say whether or not the president’s misspoken comments were conveyed to Monti’s family in an apology.

Michele Bachmann vows to clean up Washington’s corruption.  The tea party leader who will announce her candidacy on Monday, June 28th is now soaring in the presidential polls with former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney.  If elected Bachmann says she would support a federal constitutional amendment to define marriage between a man and a woman, overturning the State of New York gay marriage law.

Michele Bachmann’s rise has taken the nation and Washington by surprise.

President Obama meets with House congressional leaders on raising government debt ceiling limit in a painfully economic environment.  Obama pitches raising taxes on the rich.

Republicans and independent voters are against raising the debt ceiling.

Timothy Geithner mulling over leaving his post as Secretary of the Treasury.  His decision will be based on resolving debt ceiling.

Two republican senators suggest that the only way to save Medicare is raising the age by two years and for wealthy Americans to pay more as funds will run dry in 2024.  As a matter of a fact citizens should be aware that Obamacare has taken $500 billion out of Medicare.

Leon Panetta takes charge of Pentagon while outgoing Defense Secretary Robert Gates is honored at ceremony by President Obama giving him “Medal of Freedom” for serving his country.

Michigan Senator & guitarist 45-year-old Thaddeus McCotter enters his name on the GOP presidential roster.

Capitol Hill disputes economic report that Stimulus bill cost every taxpayer $278,000 per job creation or saved.  White House says study only based on partial information.

Hiring slows – Unemployment woes!  June’s weak jobs report could mean no tax hikes, but lead to a spike in interest rates that would hurt the economy.  Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says over the next few years we will see strong economic activity.

Airports alarmed by newest threat that terrorists are being surgically implanted with body bombs.

Obama tops GOP contenders by raising $86 million in fundraising campaigning.

Senator John McCain says he’s more qualified than Michele Bachmann.  So why isn’t McCain running for GOP presidency?

Gay conservative group wants to meet with Bachmann.  Could it be her husband’s controversial clinic?

Democratic Senator Dianne Feinstein of California announces her plan to repeal federal marriage law.  This bill would take government out of the picture by allowing states from rejecting legal same sex marriage from other states.  It would also give same type benefits to married couples as same sex couples.  Will congressional bill raise a ruckus?

GOP together with Tea Party backing its plan approves legislation for a $2.4 trillion dollar increase in nation’s borrowing, but Dems aren’t buying.  What’s next for “Gang of Six” after Senate rejects Republican bill for a balanced budget?  House Speaker Boehner and Obama go back and forth with debt talks.  Stock markets shiver over debt jitters.  House Republicans rally round Boehner’s debt limit plan while democrats chill out.  Are our politicians endangering America’s credit rating?

House approves debt bill increasing borrowing, but Senate might reject.  The nation frets while the House objects to yet another debt-limit bill by Senate Democrats on Capitol Hill.  Latest news is that debt-limit bill must include defense and entitlement cuts.  Republicans and Democrats reach an agreement on debt-limit to cut $2.2 trillion from spending over the next decade (voting 269-161).  Obama and Boehner say this time the deal is for real.  Tea Party Victory – Hiking taxes on the rich gets nixed.  President Obama signs into law $2.4 trillion increasing debt ceiling (bipartisan Senate support 74-26).  Donald Trump pokes fun at the President and congressional leaders that debt deal is a joke.  This country is suffering from lack of leadership.

Trump says he bought some hot stocks in this cloudy economy.  Just to name a few “Caterpillar, Intel, Johnson & Johnson, Proctor and Gamble.   For years he’s been watching these growing companies.

Scary economy as “Q2″ GDP expected to be 1.8 percent averaging only 1.3 for the Spring leaves Wall Street worrying.

In spite of S&P credit rating dropping from AAA to AA+ the next day Wall Street was rallying as investors go on buying spree.  Federal Reserve keeping interest rates low until 2013 due to sluggish economy with unemployment slowly recovering.  President Obama gets back at S&P with an investigation by the SEC.

Nancy Pelosi selects super duper 12-member committee in charge of recommending another $1.5 trillion in an effort to balance the budget by Thanksgiving.

General Petraeus last tour of army forces in Afghanistan before he takes over office of CIA Director.

Louisiana Senator Buddy Roemer throws his hat into the presidential ring while Texas Governor Rick Perry is still deciding.  Former Governor of Utah and Ambassador of China Jon Huntsman makes announcement that he will be running for the presidency.

Jobs and the weak economy have GOP candidates sparring.

Sarah at Iowa Fair Republican Straw Poll still undecided whether or not she’s running for the “2012″ presidency.  Representative Michele Bachmann from Minnesota wins first place in Ames, Iowa Fair Republican presidential race.  Former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty after receiving poor Iowa Straw Poll results makes an about face and drops out of presidential race.

On Friday, August 12, 2011 Federal Court of Appeals rule Obamacare as unconstitutional for all Americans to purchase health insurance or face IRS penalties.  This clause exceeds congressional commerce power.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry makes announcement in South Carolina that he’s running for the “2012″ presidency.

Obama heading for mid-west three-day campaigning “Economic Bus Tour.”

Former New York Governor and New York Peekskill Mayor George Pataki is thinking of running for the presidency.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry takes overwhelming 12-point lead surpassing former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney in the race for “2012″ GOP.

Palin faces the nation as 74% of voters say no to her running in presidential race.

Sarah’s new documentary “You Betcha!” debuts on Sunday, September 11, 2011 on Tenth Anniversary of 9/11 at the Toronto Film Festival.

Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann changes campaign strategy with the departure of GOP Strategist, Chief Staff Manager/Consultant Ed Rollins and her deputy.  She needs some catching up to do as Perry and Romney are leading.

In this weak economy who would expect car manufacturing to be recovering with the opening of new plants in the mid-west and hiring workers to keep up with the growing demand across the country.

Obama wants to set new car fuel efficiency standards by 54.5 MPG by 2025 reducing America’s dependence on foreign oil from mid-east countries.

Should U.S. fret as economic growth slows China might stop buying our debt?

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke not recommending any boost to economy.  White House expects slower job growth.  65% disapprove of Obama’s economic policies.  Will you be buying gold till you’re gray and old?

Job growth comes to halt as July and August 2011 figures show 9.1% remains the same.

President Obama will address the nation on his “Job Creation” speech of the week.

Obama says his $447 billion economic “American Jobs Act” package will create new jobs when in fact the money mainly goes to payroll tax credits, unemployment benefits, education and construction.  Is this another political trick?  Now the Prez says he’ll be changing the way unemployed workers get benefits.  Most Americans think Obama’s job plan is just another stimulus scam.

Should millionaires’ surtax be axed?  Screw the “Buffet Rule.”

Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney presents his 59-point plan for creating jobs, saving the economy by cutting corporate taxes, regulating the size of government and China’s trade policies with our country.

Businessman Herman Cain presents his “999 Plan” which he says will reduce corporate taxes, individual taxes and create a flat tax can help business, the economy and for people struggling across the country.

GOP candidates debate at Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley.  Romney and Perry confront each other over job creation and Social Security.

Israeli Prime Minister says embassy attack in Cairo may infringe upon peace pact.  Should Israel oppose Palestinian statehood when they go before U.N.?

New terror threat on “9/11 Tenth Anniversary” for Washington, D.C. and NYC.

On September 12th rate eight GOP contenders at Tampa, Florida Tea Party rally debate.  Candidates rap the crap out of Obama as Romney and Perry spar over social security.  Bachmann might of thought her remarks were smart when she attacked  Perry on HPV Vaccine, but turned out to be extremely tart.

Obama’s charm has bombed.  Voters pick Republican for New York district.  It just shows how Obama’s policies are not working says Trump the blonde charmer.  Even the Jews are not happy with Obama’s views.

Hollywood gives Obama the “cold shoulder” as he grows old and gray from all the political torture.

The former middle class becomes America’s soaring poverty. Nearly 48 million people are suffering desperately including children.

Treasury Secretary Geithner hopes he gets the U.S. out of this $1.3 trillion debt mess.

NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg’s “Riots in our Streets” states it’s a bleak resolution to our economic problems.

President Obama signs patent reform bill on Capitol Hill.

Solar panel company (Solyndra) goes into bankruptcy after Obama administration gave them $535 million of taxpayers’ “2009″ economic stimulus money.  Company execs stand behind their “Fifth Amendment” rights under congressional investigation.  Emails show Obama fundraiser went to Solyndra loans.  White House council gets and rejects Solyndra subpoenas.

On September 15, 2011 President Obama awards “Medal of Honor” to Iraq and Afghanistan war hero U.S. Marine Sgt. Dakota Meyers who saved many lives wants to join the FDNY.

This time it’s the real deal.  On September 20, 2011 “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” is repealed as gay and lesbians are accepted in the military to serve and fight for their country.

Obama at United Nations making “kosher speech” showing his solidarity for Israel wants Palestinian statehood only if they do not ignore the Jewish state’s issues. Palestine asks for statehood even though U.S. is against it.  UNESCO approves Palestinian bid for membership and Obama stops funding agency pressuring the international community to do the same thing.  Obama expresses disappointment in Israel’s building of additional settlements. Iran says it will strike back if Israel attacks.

It’s about time Afghanistan Pres. Karzai changed his mind for talks with Pakistan not the Taliban.

GOP takes a stand against a Palin run.  Trashing Sarah!  A controversial new book “The Rogue” a review of Sarah Palin’s intimate life and rise to fame from small Alaskan town mayor to United States Senator McCain’s “2008″ VP losing the election.  Levi Johnston’s “tell-it-all” book on Sarah the Cougar and his dirty little Palin family secrets.  Palin is thinking of suing “The Rogue” author for defamation of character.  Now the “National Enquirer” says Sarah and Todd Palin are heading to divorce court.

On September 22nd Fox News-Google GOP Presidential Primary Debate from Orlando see Bachmann and Cain trailing behind other candidates.  Does Ron Paul need an overhaul?

Businessman Cain reigns!  In the end it’s Herman Cain’s surprising Florida Straw Poll victory.  So far Perry is slipping and Romney holds the national lead.  Former two-term New Mexico Libertarian Governor Gary Johnson gets on board for the Presidential Primary Debate, but according to a recent poll Johnson is not considered to be a great candidate.

Cain wins Straw Poll in Minnesota, but Washington, D.C. loves Texas Congressman Ron Paul and makes him the winner of new “Values Voter Summit Straw Poll” while Herman Cain came in second place and former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum trails third in GOP Presidential race.

New Jersey Republican Governor Chris Christie decides he’s not running and tells New Jersey “You’re stuck with me” until 2016.  So who will the late night comedians toy around with now after having a barrel of fun cracking jokes about the fat boy?

Governor Christie endorses former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney for GOP’s Presidential nominee and says he would consider running for VP.  Former Republican Senate candidate and Tea Party’s choice Christine O’Donnell donates small amount toward Romney’s campaign fundraising.

Tea Party forming their own special committee as Democrats scratch their heads wondering what the heck is Obama doing to this country.

While taxpayers are footing White House bill for Obama the charmer’s hotel and travel expenses to West Coast there’s some “fun raising” $10,000 per plate campaigning.

The NBA has come to the aid of Obama funding him with campaign money.

On Thursday, September 29th four Republican Senators, John McCain, Mark Kirk, Lindsey Graham, and Marco Rubio travel to Mid-East for a meeting with new Libyan leaders who believe Gadhafi is most likely inside African desert hiding

People standing on unemployment line slightly declines as economy continues sagging behind.

Gov. Rick Perry’s racial camp rant is dampening the path to his winning the nomination for presidency.

President Obama tells gay community he stands for equality, but still believes marriage is between a man and woman.

Obama gets an “A+” for getting rid of the nuts and protecting us.

ESPN lets Hank Williams, Jr. go after he hits a sour note commenting that “Obama is like Hitler.”  Country singer apologized after making the nasty wisecrack, but ESPN owned by Disney and ABC won’t take him back.  Hank says “that’s bullshit, he quit.”  One way or another the big mouth is out.  Williams’ powerful defiant song had 150,000 downloads in 24 hours.

The average worker will get a minimum wage raise in eight states.  This means there will be $500 in every pocket for spending and boosting the economy.

Dems have a fight on their hands calling for 5.6% millionaires’ surtax hike while the GOP is knocking Obama’s stimulus job plan.

Sarah Palin makes official statement that due to family and other commitments she will not be running for the “2012″ GOP presidency.  Florida Senator Marco Rubio announces that he’s not interested in being VP.

Latest poll sees Romney better than Obama for improving the economy.  Romney sets up special team to prepare him for the “2012″ presidency with international policies. Dallas, Texas Baptist Pastor Robert Jeffress insults Romney’s Mormon religion by saying “it’s a cult.”  Former Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman who is a Mormon disagrees with Baptist Pastor’s harsh religious cult remarks.  Romney wants Perry to repudiate Pastor’s statement.  Perry takes back any comments.

New Perry ads tie Romney to Obama’s policies.  So go the polls as the Texas governor is lagging behind Cain and Romney.

Some people feel Candidate Cain’s “racism” remarks are harsh.  Cain says he’s not a racist just addressing economic white and black issues.  Herman Cain makes another sharp remark on Mexico’s border security stating “fence should be electrified” but GOP candidate says “Folks I was just poking a joke.”

House Speaker John Boehner says Obama is concentrating on campaigning than leading the country.

President Obama avoids Washington shutdown by signing bill on Tuesday, October 4th keeping government employees on the payroll for six more weeks.

As of October 7, 2011 the unemployment rate still stands at 9.1% despite 103,000 job hike which includes unionized workers put back on the payroll by Verizon.

Millions of Americans will not be collecting unemployment benefits if Obama’s American Jobs Act bill isn’t approved on Capitol Hill.

Senate Republicans vote on October 11th to kill Obama’s $447 billion America Jobs Act slamming certain parts of the bill.

On October 11th at the New Hampshire GOP primary candidates Perry, Cain and Romney debate on the economy.  Former Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman speaks on scaling back the military and cutting spending while Michelle Bachmann is looking for a comeback.

Tickets for CNN’s Western Republican Seven Candidate Debate to be held on Tuesday, October 18th at Venetian Hotel on the Vegas strip.  Candidates meet and greet while Santorum and Perry try to defeat Romney by bickering.  Cain addresses his “999″ plan which he has now changed to “909″ (for families living in poverty) and still insists it’s the best.  Conservative candidate Newt Gingrich makes a good pitch on jobs, the economy and hot issue of illegal immigration that face the nation.  Ron Paul says once and for all we need to cut defense spending and aid to foreign countries.  Bachmann lashed out on Obama’s poll ratings as failing economic policies.  Former Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman slams Romney’s leadership flip-flopping.  Romney says I’m not a “flip-flop.”  I’ve been consistent on every policy issue.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry unveils his optional “Flat 20% Tax” plan which he says will greatly reduce taxes across this great land.

The latest Western Straw Poll shows Herman Cain leading most candidates in the race for the “2012″ presidency, but former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney is leading in 4 states.

On October 21st Candidate Cain at Iowa Caucus says he supports abortion, but then states it should be a family decision.  Perry and Bachmann see Cain “flip-flopping.”

Shame on Herman Cain.  Republican candidate hires and fires Kristian Otto Herzog who says he quit as a security guard after a few debates.  Herzog who was a convicted felon having impersonated a police officer allegedly also guarded Actor Mel Gibson’s ex-girlfriend and singer Oksana.  Cain says he was not aware of this, but Kristian wrote a book on “His True Hollywood Story.”  Now Herman Cain is being blasted for sexual harassment allegations on four female employees which two accusers cite numerous advances as candidate denies taking place back in the days of his connection as CEO for National Restaurant Association.  55-year-old Karen Kraushaar former journalist one of the three women is presently working as Communications Director under Obama administration.  Fourth accuser Sharon Bialek goes public with her famous daytime TV show “We the People” attorney, Gloria Allred at a press conference.  Radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh slams the media for ugly stereotype attack on black conservative.  One woman who received $45,000 in compensation is also speaking out through her attorney.  Cain wants Texas Gov. Rick Perry to apologize for breaking news story of alleged sexual harassment by his campaign adviser who denies it.  Texas Congressman Ron Paul says it’s enough of this sexual harassment stuff.  Let’s get back to business presenting our republican economic policies for the nation’s prosperity.  Newt Gingrich praises Cain for his steadfast in light of sexual scandal.  Cain’s wife, Gloria of 43 years who stands beside her man says her husband “totally respects women.”  Accuser’s ex-boyfriend Victor Zuckerman, a pediatrician says he believes Bialek’s story that Cain allegedly touched her in an inappropriate manner.  Fifth accuser, Ginger White comes forward claiming to news media she had a sexual affair with Cain for 13 years.  “Georgia on my Mind” or “Women on my mind all the time?”  Herman Cain debating should he stay in the presidential race while accusing news media of “character assassination.”  Candidate Cain says he is fighting for his integrity, but won’t make any decisions to drop out of race until he speaks with his wife.  On Saturday, December 3rd, Cain announced he suspends his campaign.  Ginger White says she is not a “hooker” but took money from other men besides Herman.

Cain’s poll ratings have been dropping after the sexual harassment allegations became public and his foreign policy gaffe.

Herman Cain who recently received threats gets Secret Service protection.

Samuel “Joe the Plumber” Wurzelbacher whose business is fixing leaky pipes has now decided to run for congressman of the great Ohio buckeye state.

Former Mayor of NYC Rudy Giuliani says he’s decided not to run for the “2012″ Republican presidency.  Steve Forbes endorses  Rick Perry while former New Hampshire governor and Chief White House Staffer backs Romney.

While Candidate Herman Cain travels around the country promoting his book and funny campaign his Chief of Staff did a smoking advertisement for the “2012″ election while late night hosts are cracking jokes.

Tea Party asks Candidate Bachmann to quit the Presidential race.  Perry is deciding whether or not he’ll be in the upcoming debates as his numbers are sinking.  It looks like it’s a “slim win.”  Former Republican Senator Rick Santorum from Pennsylvania is struggling to keep his head above water.

House members demand action to ending Afghanistan operations that began on October 7, 2001 marking the tenth anniversary.  By ending the war it would cut the $1.3 trillion deficit while most agree that we need to fix China’s trade policies and stop buying oil from mid-east countries.

New trade bills with South Korea, Columbia and Panama will give $15 billion for creating jobs and boosting U.S. economy.

President Obama pulls in more fundraising money than Perry, Cain or Romney.  Perry and Romney have raised more money than any other GOP candidate in the presidential race.

AARP advertising scaring retirees that there could be cuts in Social Security benefits.  Meanwhile beginning January 1st, 2012 the government okays Social Security recipients 3.6% pay raise and Medicare premium will be a lower monthly fee of $3.50 instead of $10.20.

On October 12th Hollywood actress and U.N. Goodwill Ambassador Angelina Jolie visits Libya in support of refugees that have suffered under Gadhafi regime.

On Thursday, October 20th Secretary of State Hillary Rodman Clinton makes unannounced visit to Tripoli supporting the people of Libya in their fight for democracy.  She also stops in Pakistan to discuss Afghanistan and the Haqqani terror network.

On October 20th, 69-year-old dictator Moammar Gadhafi is captured and assassinated.  Shot in the neck, back and pronounced dead from bullet wound to head at Misrata Hospital.  (gruesome video)

On October 21st President Obama announces that the United States will be supporting the Libyan people in their quest for democracy.  Obama could win “2012″ election for his war on terror, but some say it will be a one-term presidency.

Mid-east countries discussing suspending Syria from Arab League.  Israelis and Palestinians celebrating prisoner swapping, but some people are not happy. Israel also swapped a prisoner with Egypt.

Prosecution in the trial of former dictator Hosni Mubarak will be in December.  Syrian and Yemen uprisings replacing dictators for democracy.

On Sunday, October 16, 2011 President Obama makes a speech honoring the memory of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “I Have a Dream” stone memorial dedication in Washington.

Obama says children should not be watching Reality TV about the Kardashians.  The celebrity family is not pleased with President’s comments.  Kim allegedly ditched Kris on grounds of “not enough dick.”  Next time you’re looking for fame Kim don’t marry a guy with your mother’s first name.  Disgruntled moviegoers are not happy Kim is starring in Tyler Perry’s “The Marriage Counselor.”

President Obama traveling to high-unemployment states to raise campaign money.  His 3-day bus tour with wife Michelle is to push employers toward hiring military veterans coming home from Iraq and Afghanistan.  Some firms say they pledge to hire 25,000 veterans.

Obama promotes his new mortgage plan “Aid to Save Homeowners and help for Student Loans.”  Economists believe Obama’s program is going nowhere as banks have no intention on lending any money especially to foreclosures in this failing economy.  Former House Speaker and “2012″ Presidential Republican Candidate Newt Gingrich sees Obama’s new plan for student loans as a “ponzi scheme.”  Radio Talk Show Host Rush Limbaugh agrees.

As of October 20, 2011 unemployment claims rise to over 400,000 as more people stand on lines.

As of October 27, 2011 new unemployment claims fall while GDP climbs for first time to a seasonably high 2.5% as economists were expecting 2.4% in 3rd quarter.

Dow soars 3% over European debt deal and assistance in helping weak Greece economy.  Obama attends G-20 economic summit.  Greek Prime Minister George Papadreau resigns, but happy country will be bailed out on brink of bankruptcy.  Next in line is Italy’s failing economy having nominated Economist Mario Monti to replace ex-Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi after he resigned serving 17 years dominating his country with lies and sex scandals. The world hinges upon European financial stability.  Investors say European debt is a “train wreck.”

Super Committee has until November 23rd to come up with a real good “cut the nation’s $1.2 trillion deficit deal.”  12-Member Panel face between a rock and a hard place.  AARP organization targets Super Committee.

Obama unveils new proposal plan for student loans which might put taxpayers’ money at risk while Radio Talk Show Host Limbaugh says Obama’s plan would only save college graduates less than $10.00 a month quoting a magazine article.

On October 31, 2011 Obama issues an Executive Order addressing FDA on drug prescription shortage crisis.

Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac execs got fat bonuses in 2010 on backs of taxpayers while homeowners suffer foreclosures.  Senator John McCain of Arizona addressing executives who got million dollar bonuses says they should be fired immediately.  Former House Speaker, Reagan staffer and Conservative Republican Candidate Newt Gingrich says “I was hired as an historian not a lobbyist for the housing company” flip-flops over $1.6 million and $1.8 million he got in fees from Freddie Mac as a consultant.  Gingrich was also paid enormous amounts of money for consulting drug and health care companies.  CEOs with large bonuses from the giant mortgage company go before House of Representatives’ hearing.

In new November 2nd poll Cain is seen leading Romney 30% to 23%.

On November 2nd, the nation’s motto “In God We Trust” is reaffirmed by Congress.

MF Global Fund tumbles as its former CEO once upon a time New Jersey Senator Jon Corzine resigns after $1.2 billion in missing investors’ money is now under investigation.  MF Global is accused of co-mingling funds.  Jon Corzine is under scrutiny.  C0mpany fired all of its employees who are suing for back pay they did not receive.  Corzine who was also a former CEO of Goldman Sachs goes before a congressional hearing and states “He does not know what happened to the missing money.”  Judge approves $2.2 billion of bankrupt MF Global transfer to customers.

Calling for Attorney General Eric Holder’s resignation in light of “Fast and Furious” investigation on Capitol Hill for hearing.

Customers leaving Bank of America and other institutions that were planning $5.00 debit card fees and $30.00 overdraft charges have transferred their money into credit unions.

On Friday, November 4th five GOP candidates debate on at Des Moines, Iowa Reagan dinner.  They praised Ronald Reagan, but lashed out at Obama’s failed policies.  Texas Gov. Rick Perry said if he were elected President the first thing on his calendar would be to freeze Congress and government employees’ salaries.  Former House Speaker and GOP Conservative candidate Newt Gingrich catching up to Romney.

On Wednesday, November 9th eight GOP candidates debate in Rochester, Michigan for lower taxes and less government regulations.  Rick Perry gets an “F” for his bad memory when he fumbles having difficulty remembering name of a government agency.  The evening ends with Romney leading, Bach rocks, Newt gets a boost and Cain’s “999″ plan becomes a pain.  Audience was not happy with former NYC hatcheck girl now CNBC’s news commentator Maria Bartiromo confronting Herman Cain on sexual harassment allegations.  Twitter followers respond to Cain’s nickname of House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi when stating that she stalled health care reform plan by sending it to a committee he referred to her as “Princess Pelosi.”

Ohio takes a stand and repeals collective bargaining ban.

On Friday, November 11th Obama goes to Island of Hawaii to meet with APEC leaders before taking off on nine day summit to Australia and Asia-Pacific to promote trade policies for creating U.S. jobs and businesses.  Obama seals $25 billion Asian deal.

President Obama praises Arab League’s leadership for suspending Syria’s membership and sanctions for anti-demonstrations.  Thousands of Syrians attack international embassies after Arab League suspends country’s membership.

Egyptians take to the streets of Tahrir Square fighting and willing to die for democracy. Egypt apologizes for death of Cairo protester.

On Saturday, November 12th eight candidates debate as guests of CBS in South Carolina on the mid-east, national security and foreign policy.  Tough talking Romney says he’s got a plan to ban Iran’s nuclear program while Santorum and Perry speak about funding countries like Pakistan.  Perry tries to make comeback after gaffe.  Cain, Huntsman and Bachmann agree that waterboarding is not torture and should be reinstated.  Bachmann’s polls are sliding while Newt Gingrich is still climbing trying to get ahead of Romney.  Bachmann has been very displeased with an email from CBS stating because of low ratings they may limit her discussions.  Protesters at a rally before Saturday’s tenth debate were shouting at Bachmann as she tried to reply.

On Saturday, November 19th six GOP candidates debate before moderator, Frank Luntz at First Federated Church in Des Moines, Iowa as they sat around a table for Thanksgiving Dinner Family Forum from 5:00 to 7:00 pm.  Mitt Romney and Jon Huntsman decided not to attend after receiving invitations.  The water server girl Michele Bachmann, Astute Newt Gingrich, Determined Herman Cain, Loyal Ron Paul, Merry Rick Perry, and Quick Rick Santorum gave their views on social issues, morality, God and personal responsibility.  There were tears in the candidates eyes as they discussed their religious faiths before an audience of social conservatives.  Newt Gingrich spoke on his inner demons, Rick Santorum talked about not loving his disabled daughter and Herman Cain finding out he had Cancer.  When Cain covered his face the audience applauded the candidate.  Michele Bachmann described the anguish she experienced over her parents’ divorce.  Of course Rick Perry and Ron Paul were less personal when it came to family details.  Santorum the most aggressive candidate at the forum said President Obama must push for Judeo-Christian values across this country.  Ron Paul disagreed saying it is not government’s role to mold society, but to preserve liberty.

So go the polls as Gingrich is leading in Iowa and Romney in New Hampshire.  Michele Bachmann and Jon Huntsman are now celebrities making appearances on the Today Show, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and SNL.  NBC apologizes to Bachmann for playing wrong song “Lyin’ Bitch Ass” by Fishbone a member of Jimmy Fallon’s band who was severely reprimanded.

On Tuesday, November 22nd eight candidates debate at Constitution Hall on National Security and Foreign policy in Washington, D.C. before moderator Wolf Blitzer of CNN starting 8:00 p.m.   Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich who is now leading Romney in national polls makes a stand on illegal immigration why people with families living here for 25 years should stay in this country.  Romney and Bachmann disagree while Newt says, “It’s the humane thing to do.”  Bachmann says Gingrich is too liberal.  Candidates slammed Obama’s defense budget cuts while sparring over Pakistan, Afghanistan and Iran.

Iowa social conservative groups see Romney as a “flip-flopper” and are secretly meeting before the January caucus for another candidate that can beat him in Iowa, New Hampshire and other voting states across the country.  In the interim New Hampshire’s “Union Leader” newspaper roots for Newt while Romney gets Miami’s American Cuban approval.

Obama is in the New Hampshire region promoting his payroll tax and jobless benefits extension plan.  Conservative Republicans will not back a millionaire tax.

Newt Gingrich at Iowa Town Hall for a “Pizza Deficit Party” while Ron Paul is promoting his new “cook book.”

Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey says GOP candidates have an uphill battle against Obama for the presidency.  He slams Obama for being a “bystander” not a “leader.”

On Wednesday, November 30th banks roar as Dow soars on Euro rescue.

Donald Trump rips into Obama for being inconsiderate by holding a fundraiser dinner on the eve of celebrating lighting up Rockefeller Center Christmas tree.

Obama pledges additional $50 million for Aids virus treatment to medical facilities across the country.

President Obama’s “We Can’t Wait” executive order and former President Clinton initiate a new $4 billion “energy efficiency program” with the federal government and private sector investment creating thousands of jobs for the construction industry.

Unemployment rate goes down to 8.6% from 9.0% as of December 2nd the first time in more than two years which means 120,000 jobs were filled probably due to hiring by retail chains for the holidays.  At the same time 316,000 people have given up looking for work in this rough economy.

On Saturday, December 5th five Republican Presidential hopefuls Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum sit down and debate from immigration, Obama’s health care law to the Constitution before co-host Mike Huckabee and a panel of three forum.  Herman Cain who suspended his campaign and Jon Huntsman did not attend.

On Wednesday, December 7th GOP candidates debate at Republican Jewish Forum in Washington.  Libertarian Ron Paul was banned from the debate discussing his extreme views on Iranian nuclear issues.

On Saturday, December 10th six GOP candidates 11th debate starting 8:00 p.m. at Drake University in Des Moines, Iowa before ABC News Moderators, George Stephanopoulos and Diane Sawyer.  Bachmann lets loose on Romney-Newt with their views of individual health mandate issue.  Romney makes a $10,000 bet with Perry which the Texas Governor rejects regarding the Massachusetts mandate for one State.  Then Gingrich attacked Romney stating why he was never a “career politician” as Mitt lost to Ted Kennedy.  Former Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman is a “no show.”

On Thursday, December 15th starting at 9:00 p.m. sponsored by Fox News, seven Republican candidates once again debate from Sioux City, Iowa: Gingrich, Bachmann, Paul, Romney, Santorum, Huntsman and Perry.

Donald J. Trump who is still considering running for the Presidency as an Independent after “Celebrity Apprentice” finale says he’s definitely backing GOP Presidential Candidate and will not be moderating Des Moines, Iowa Republican Debate on Newsmax ION Network Tuesday, December 27th at 8:00.  Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney said he would be busy campaigning and U.S. Representative of Minnesota Michele Bachmann had no intentions on participating.

On Thursday, December 22nd President Obama signs and praises Congressional leaders on Capitol Hill for their approval of two-month payroll tax extension and jobless benefits bill.

Former VP Dan Quayle, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, former Delaware candidate Christine O’Donnell, South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley, George H.W. Bush, 41st President of the U.S., Republican Senator John Thune of South Dakota, influential newspaper Des Moines Register, Actress and Model Cindy Crawford who previously backed Obama, including Michael Grimm, NY Congressman are all endorsing Mitt Romney while Iowa polls show Gingrich sinking.

Dow starts the new year on a positive note with markets slightly rising 1.5% on some global market growth.  Jobless rate declines from 8.6 percent to 8.5 since 2009 showing the economy is recovering slowly.  Higher gas prices at the pump will crunch consumer’s pockets into the summer months.

On Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012 Mitt Romney grabs the top spot at Iowa Caucus narrowly beating Rick Santorum by just eight votes who comes in second with Libertarian Ron Paul coming in third, Newt Gingrich fourth, Rick Perry fifth and Michele Bachmann in sixth place while candidate Jon Huntsman trails last for the Republican presidential race.

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann decides to suspend her campaign after receiving poor voting returns and having exhausted funding.  Rick Perry, Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, Newt Gingrich and Jon Huntsman will go on to New Hampshire battling to be the presidential nominee.

Gingrich says he’s a true “conservative” which the Tea Party favors while Mitt is “too moderate.”  Santorum charms Iowan voters with “Game On.”  Fox News Host Mike Huckabee says Santorum can win the GOP nomination.  How bout Rick in the White House instead of Romney?  Huckabee disagrees on a comeback for Perry.

Arizona Senator John McCain not only wants Romney to be GOP nominee but is endorsing him at New Hampshire rally.  New Jersey Governor Chris Christie will be at New Hampshire debate backing Romney.

Mitt Romney’s hometown newspaper the New Hampshire Boston Globe endorses Jon Huntsman.  Influential paper states that Romney and Huntsman are the best candidates to be considered for GOP nominees.

Newt Gingrich leader of the Republican pack says he will ax capital gains tax.  Gingrich proposes individual accounts for young people changing the entire social security system.

President Obama addresses the nation after one million soldiers have served our country while sadly 4,500 have lost their lives, all troops in Iraq will finally be coming back home by the end of 2011 in time to celebrate the holidays.  Some troops have already started to leave.  Remainder of troops in Afghanistan should be out of that country by end of 2014.  Some congressional members are pleased with Obama’s foreign policy as it would cut defense spending adding money to a failing economy.  Talks between the U.S. and Iraq to have some training people left behind fell through the cracks leaving the country vulnerable to Iran and Al-Qaeda attacks.  Defense Secretary Leon Panetta and Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton agree that leaving Iraq is an open door for terror attacks from Iran.  President Obama approves new sanctions on Iran after meeting with Russia and China.

Pres. Karzai of Afghanistan who’s received billions of U.S. dollars and troops fighting terror in his country vents harsh comment that he will back Pakistan if U.S. attacks.  Karzai says he won’t go into a partnership with the U.S. unless they agree with NATO to stop carrying out night raids in his country.

NATO drones kill 24 of Pakistan’s troops.  They want to boot the U.S. out of their country.  The Obama administration is holding an investigation.  VP Biden says U.S. will back Iraq.

President Obama at Ft. Bragg welcoming the troops back from Iraq.

President Obama and family vacation in Hawaii where he signs defense bill on New Year’s eve stating his reservations on terrorist interrogations, Iranian sanctions and Russia-U.S. relations.

Obama faces Constitutional questions over using his executive power on recess appointments naming new Chiefs to head Labor Relations Board and Consumer Protection Bureau.

On Wednesday, January 4th, 2012 he visits the battleground State of Ohio with his new “We Can’t Wait” motto.

On January 5th Obama tells the nation he is cutting $489 billion in military spending.  Some Congressional leaders question whether this is a good idea for our country.

President Obama may change the rules on some immigration with people facing deportation.

U.S. Navy ship intervenes in the Arabian Sea saving thankful Iranian fishermen from pirates.

Starting January 7th weekend six candidates hold hot debates in New Hampshire slamming each other.  Mitt Romney is still leading.  Paul, Santorum, Huntsman are in the upper tier with Gingrich and Perry trailing.  Candidates are mad about the ugly ads.  Libertarian Ron Paul and former Utah Gov. and Ambassador to China under Obama administration Jon Huntsman are seeking independent supporters.

Billionaire casino executive of the Las Vegas Sands and long time friend of Newt Gingrich backs him with $5 million contribution to Super Pac committee for candidate’s presidency.

GOP and DNC attacking Romney’s Bain gain while Rick Santorum sells sweater vests hoping to impress voters.  Paul and Santorum do not think it’s good politics to attack Romney’s Bain Capital Investment Company.

Surprise endorsement by Todd Palin for Newt Gingrich, but wife Sarah former Alaska governor has not made up her mind who she’s endorsing.

On January 8th Obama says skidoo to Chief of Staff Bill Daley and hires former Budget Director Jack Lew as new Chief of Staff to head the top brass.  Democrats not happy with administration’s selection.

On Tuesday, January 10th the granite state primary voters put Mitt Romney in first place, Ron Paul in second and Jon Huntsman in third while Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum and Rick Perry find themselves trailing behind.  All candidates are heading to South Carolina and Florida.

Recount of votes in Iowa shows Santorum beating Romney.  Mitt Romney appeals to some voters, but they feel he needs Ron Paul’s strategy.

Obama planning on rebuilding the economy with tax breaks for businesses bringing jobs to this country.

On Wednesday, January 11th John Bolton, U.S. Ambassador under President George W. Bush endorses Mitt Romney.

George Romney born in Mexico makes son Mitt half Latino should go over big with voters in Puerto Rico.

Rick Perry key backer leaves presidential race due to governor attacking Romney as a “Vulture Capitalist” for Bain Investment Company.  Dogs Against Romney.com “Mitt is Mean” for traveling with pooch on car roof.

Federal Judge rules since Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, John Huntsman and Rick Perry failed to get 10,000 voter signatures they will not be on Virginia’s March primary.  Does it really matter as candidate Mitt Romney is winning voters across the country?

Unemployment applications rose sharply to 399,000 for January while mortgage foreclosures are increasing.

Obama wants to increase the debt ceiling which most Republicans do not agree.  President Obama’s new campaign strategy is seeking authority to streamline government agencies.  The President’s tactics are backwards.  Let’s face it this guy’s change never came when stimulus money went down the drain.

Huntsman quits the race and endorses Romney while Gingrich is booed on Fox News attacking Mitt’s “Bain” company.  Rick Perry drops out of the race and endorses Newt Gingrich.

All that’s left is four Republican candidates, Santorum, Romney, Gingrich and Paul debating in South Carolina’s presidential primary.  Newt Gingrich who says he’s got nothing to hide reveals his tax return online and “2006″ Fannie/Freddie Mac contract.  Newt insists he was a “consultant” not a “lobbyist.”

Mitt Romney still hasn’t disclosed his tax return which former Massachusetts governor says he intends to show sometime in April.  Newt Gingrich put on a good show this time attacking President Obama and his administration on how many more people were on food stamp program.

Just in case you didn’t know while Gingrich was married, Callista was his former mistress.  Could this effect family values or his conservative candidacy?  Guess it hasn’t since South Carolina voters told Romney to scoot as they “Rooted for Newt.”  Four candidates are now off to sunny Florida for the primary.

On January 21st Michael Reagan and Sarah Palin make statements endorsing Newt Gingrich for the presidential nominee.

Mitt Romney reveals his “2010″ tax return online showing he made millions tucked away in the Cayman Islands and Sweden.  Romney married into money besides his family fortune.  This guy has more dollars and cents than some Americans in the 1%.

The U.S. Navy uses dolphins as a secret weapon tracking Iran’s blocking Strait of Hormuz.

GOP slams Obama administration for not approving Canadian Keystone pipeline which would have created thousands of jobs across the nation.

Former Tennessee Senator Fred Thompson endorses Newt Gingrich on Fox’s “Hannity.”

Santorum is pleased to receive millions for his campaign from benefactor Foster and Lynn Friess Family Foundation.

On Thursday, January 26th CNN’s Wolf Blitzer sole moderator of Florida debate with Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney and Ron Paul four remaining candidates in the race.  Newt gets into the ring attacking Romney on religion, health care reform, immigration and investments, but former Massachusetts governor comes back swinging after losing to former House Speaker in South Carolina he’s now winning Hispanic voters in Florida.

Some voters feel Obama can beat Romney, but who’s the better singer?  Romney can carry a tune as he serenades Florida voters while campaigning with “America the Beautiful.”  Obama who is far from a leader can always “wing it” as a singer.  First Lady  Michelle Obama a guest on Jay Leno Show jokes about Romney’s charming singing, but can Obama sing for his supper like little Tommy Tucker?

Who can stump Newt the “Grump?”  Once he gets into the ring there’s no stopping Gingrich.

Herman Cain endorsing Newt Gingrich ahead of Florida primary.

Actor Jon Voight (Angelina Jolie’s daddy) Tampa Bay Times and Florida’s Attorney General Pam Bondi supporting Mitt Romney.

Former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum who won Iowa temporarily drops out of the race as his 3-year-old daughter, Bella has a rare genetic disease and was hospitalized with pneumonia.  The eldest daughter and a reality star will be pitching in for him.  Great news for Bella as she’s now on the road to recovery.

Gov. Luis Fortuno of Puerto Rico and Nevada’s largest newspaper endorsing Mitt Romney.

Nevada Tea Party Activist Sharron Angle endorses Rick Santorum.

Mighty Newt lawsuit over using “Eye of the Tiger” music while campaigning.

Mitt Romney winner of the Florida primary selects “poor” choice of words has everyone in a uproar including Gingrich who questions his comment.  Texas Libertarian Ron Paul says people just took Romney’s remark out of context.  Romney admits his “poor” misstatement over blitz of media attention.

Looks like the Tea Party is getting used to Romney as they do not see a comparable nominee.

Due to huge crowds Mitt Romney gets Secret Service protection.

Florida race sees Newt Gingrich in second place, Rick Santorum third and Ron Paul fourth.  So what’s in store for the candidates as they head to the States of Minnesota, Missouri and Colorado?

Ron Paul speaking to voters in Minnesota tells them that he delivered 4,000 babies and was in the military.

It’s a blockbuster for Rick Santorum as he’s the winner of Minnesota, Missouri and Colorado primaries.  Romney downplays Santorum’s win as he prepares for new strategy.  Santorum is attacking Romney and bringing in a lot of Super Pac money.

Colorado student charged with misdemeanor flinging “glitter” on Mitt Romney.

Catholic and Jewish groups angry with Obama administration that new health care law is for abortion.  Gingrich calls Obama administration health care law on “contraception” an outright “War Against Religion.”  Holy Cross vs. Blue Cross.

First lawsuit by Catholic network to stop “contraception” mandate by Obama administration.  With all the criticism Obama reverses mandate on contraception.

Obama wants to turn foreclosures into rentals.  He’ll fight for “Homeowners’ Bill of Rights.”  Ten million people are under water to pay mortgages.  President Obama is also preparing new jobs program for veterans.

Obama approves $25 billion mortgage settlement with lenders not only helping, but acknowledging wrongdoing.  Housing problem could affect recovering economy.  Foreclosures at five-year low.

You’re Hired – You’re Fired!  Trump bumps Gingrich then endorses Romney for the Republican nominee stating “He’s tough, smart and sharp.”

Gingrich comes in second, Paul third and Santorum forth with Romney claiming victory in Nevada primary, but the polls see Obama leading across the country.

Goldman Sachs investment banking and securities firm who received $10 billion bailout from Obama administration is backing Romney.

Some bad stuff for Newt Gingrich as Florida man is suing former Speaker of the House claiming his security team roughed him up.

Boom Bam!  Is Israel getting ready to bomb Iran’s nuclear facility?  The United States thinks Iran may be attacking our country.  Obama administration puts new sanctions on Iran’s central banking system and tells Israel to rethink military action against Iran.

Donald Trump on candidates and the election.  Trump says Jon Huntsman former Ambassador to China gave away a big chunk of our country.  Rick Santorum former Pennsylvania Senator lost by a huge margin so nobody really wanted him.  I can’t see Santorum winning the presidency.   Pres. Obama’s stand on “contraception” has a lot of Catholics angry.  It’s no way to run this country.  Speaking of the Iran controversy Trump believes Obama could win another term by pressuring America’s power and sanctions.

Meanwhile Santorum is leading in Tennessee.  Former Pennsylvania Senator makes remark that he does not agree with gays in the military and opposition to women in combat.  Santorum says he was referring to “men’s emotions” wben women get in harm’s way.  He believes that gays are a “social issue” regarding close quarters with other soldiers.

Romney says he’s no Washington insider like Santorum.  Are the Republican candidates losing it as they battle one another when they should be fighting Obama?  Gingrich’s wife Callista speaks at D.C. CPAC.  Is this Newt’s new strategy?  Only Romney, Gingrich and Santorum attended the conference.  Ron Paul hopped a plane to Maine.

After Santorum’s surge Romney tells CPAC conservatives I was “severely conservative” as a Republican governor.  Santorum speaks at CPAC on Obamacare, economy, liberty and freedom.

On Thursday, February 9th Obama meets with Democratic gay donors at Washington, D.C. dinner and raises a whopping $1.4 million for his campaign.

Mitt Romney wins over conservatives at D.C. CPAC and claims victory in Maine.  Santorum marches on edging out Romney in Michigan.  Newt Gingrich asks God to save him from Santorum and Romney.  Santorum attacks Romney with “machine gun” ad tactics.  Michigan Governor Rick Snyder, Detroit News, Arizona Republican Newspaper and Gov. Jan Brewer of Arizona endorse Mitt Romney.  Arizona Sheriff resigns after Romney allegations.

Ohio’s Attorney General switches from Romney endorsing Santorum.  Gingrich woos Arizona Latino voters.

Republican candidates hold sit-down heated CNN debate as they wait results from Michigan and Arizona voters.

U.N. Security Council resolution to sanction Syria for crimes against their people vetoed by Russia and China.  Obama urges President Assad to step down due to the violence and killings in his country.  Billions at stake as Russia backs Syria.

U.S. tells Israel to hold off on military action against Iran.

Romney blasts Defense Secretary Leon Panetta for early withdrawal from Afghanistan from 2014 to 2013.

Wall Street cuts contributions to Democrats that could hurt their election.

Dow gains after Greece okays austerity budget even though government workers are not happy.

Obama’s “2013″ Budget Proposal will stifle the economy.

During 3-day West Coast trip Obama expects to raise millions for his campaign.

$143 billion payroll tax cut and jobless benefits extension package is passed till end of 2012 by Senate and House leaders Friday, February 17th on Capitol Hill goes to President Obama for signature.  The average worker making $50,000 will get $750 to $1,000 more in their paycheck.

Starbucks CEO says Washington has failed on job creation.

Rep. Bachmann defends her Tea Party on attacks she’s anti-women.

Obama serenades his wife and the rest of the crowd with “Sweet Home Chicago” a Blues Concert held at the White House.

President Obama apologizes to Afghanistan for burning the Quran.  GOP slams Obama for apology.

Mitt Romney wants to save Medicare by raising the age.  Rick Santorum, a loving devoted father has gained momentum with voters.

Jane Lynch of “Glee” says Romney does not know how to relate to people.  Are you comparing him to Obama’s singing?

Romney tells voters in Michigan the economy and job creation will always be the foundation for his election.  Seattle Times supporting Mitt Romney.

Santorum switches his strategy to economic policy after Romney wins the Arizona, Michigan and Wyoming primaries.  Voters still “leary” of Romney.

Romney and Paul projected winners in State of Washington.  And the winner is Mitt  Romney Washington primary.  More Tea Partiers are backing Romney.

“Fools Rush In” – Advertisers are damn mad and pulled their ads off Conservative Rush Limbaugh’s Radio Talk Show in spite of his apology regarding  contraception to 30-year-old Sandra Fluke, activist and law student at Georgetown University for “slut” and “prostitute” rant.  Three were other media commentators like Glenn Beck who also made “harsh remarks.”  President Obama called law student offering his concerns and support.   Sandra Fluke a guest on “The View” spoke to Barbara Walters and other host ladies that she and other students from Georgetown University have “private insurance” which would not affect taxpayer money.  Despite all the “contraception” controversy Fluke says she would do it all over again excluding the ranting.  What about the panting?

Rush (the band) and Peter Gabriel are no fan of Limbaugh since his crude spat with Fluke.  Hey rude dude you played Gabriel’s “Sledgehammer” while calling the Georgetown law student a “prostitute.”  Limbaugh has been slapped with cease-and-desist letters ordering him not to play their music.

Rush Limbaugh after losing over 100 advertisers, brassy radio host talker opens “Twitter” account posting his first two tweets responding to Fluke scandal hoping to mobilize supporters.

John Boehner, Representative from Ohio and Speaker of United States House of Representatives,  Virginia Representative Eric Cantor, Senator Tom Coburn of Oklahoma and former President George W. Bush and Attorney General John Ashcroft endorse Romney.

Sarah Palin wants Florida Congressman Allen West another singer to be GOP VP nominee.

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke declares U.S. economy could be heading for a “cold” recovery.  Unless growth accelerates, unemployment rate would not be falling.

With gas prices going “through the roof” Donald Trump says OPEC is just laughing at us.  Mid-East unrest and U.S. refinery closures we can’t seem to get out of this mess.

Obama tells Americans the government buys “fuel efficient” trucks and cars to save on gasoline.  Is this his idea of the American dream?  Why isn’t he trying to bring down gas prices with an energy policy?

Former President Bill Clinton says “Build an alternate route to Keystone Pipeline.”

President Obama campaigning in NYC hoping to raise $5 million for his re-election.

Tough re-election awaits Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann.  Conservative donors seem to be tiring of her asking them for money.  She’s left with a $1 million presidential campaign debt.

Newt a potential nominee for the presidency falls asleep while on camera giving a speech to the American Israel Public Affairs Committee.  Is this what we can expect?  A man who day dreams protecting our country.

Foul or fool remark made by Mitt Romney about his wife, Ann introducing her as the “Heavyweight” of the family.  Mitt admits he didn’t mean it.  Ouch!  He certainly was not referring to Ann’s weight, but did put foot in his mouth.

Romney tells media he loves cold cereal.  His favorite is Honey Nut Cheerios or anything sugary and sandwiches with peanut butter and jelly.

March 6th “Super Tuesday” in ten states see candidates in a tight race for the Republican primary election.  Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum win three states a piece gaining more delegates.  “Tortoise” Gingrich wins his State of Georgia.  Sarah Palin voted for Newt Gingrich in Alaska.

Santorum tells Newt it’s time to drop out of the presidential race since “Super Tuesday” shows very low voter polls.

Joe “the plumber” Samuel Wurzelbacher is running in Toledo, Ohio for Ninth Congressional District GOP primary.

Romney lays it on thick with Southern grits.  Mitt Romney’s chances of winning are slim as he struggles with religious primary voters in Southern states heading into Mississippi and Alabama trailing behind either Gingrich or Santorum.  The question is, will Romney a moderate land enough white Evangelical voters to make a difference for his candidacy?

Romney and Gingrich skip Kansas as it looks like Santorum wins it.  Rick Santorum says economic recovery is “anemic.”

Since candidates can’t be everywhere they’re sending their daughters or sons to campaign for them.  Mitt Romney wins Guam American Samoa, Northern Mariana Islands and Hawaii.

Rick Santorum overwhelming wins Kansas caucuses while Romney is the winner in the State of Wyoming.

Republican candidates looking to win 60 delegates in the Alabama Mississippi and Hawaii primaries.  Obama infomercial killing Romney.

Redneck comedian Jeff Foxworthy helping Romney with Southern hospitality, but what Mitt needs is to improve his personality.

“Sweet Home Alabama” Governor endorses Santorum.  Guys in the slammer got to vote in Alabama.  Conservative Rick “Deep in the Heart of Dixie” wins Alabama and Mississippi while voters are not too happy with “moderate” Romney.  Gingrich says he’s not quitting.

Santorum is seen in Puerto Rico wooing Latinos.  His chief staffers think Gingrich should step aside as he’s taking conservative votes from Santorum.  Rick thinks Mitt should easily be winning considering his financial advantage.  The race now turns to caucuses in Louisiana, Missouri, Illinois and Puerto Rico primary. Mitt Romney says he certainly would support Puerto Rico statehood.

Two guys kissing at Santorum rally are escorted out of the building.  Go Gays!

In his opinion, Ed Gillespie Political Strategist and Former White House Counselor to President George W. Bush, Mitt Romney has enough conservative support to win the presidential nomination.

Sparks are flying over Rick Santorum’s remark that Puerto Ricans should speak “English” if they want statehood.

Romney pouring tons of money into Illinois primary and sending in New Jersey “crony” Gov. Chris Christie.

Shutterbug catches Rick Santorum “shirtless” sunbathing at poolside in Puerto Rico.  Rick says “Sorry I don’t look trim and fit.”  Guess he wanted to take a break from all the political bullshit.

Go Romney!  The best candidate wins 20 delegates with Latino voters in Puerto Rico.  It looks like Santorum and Gingrich are licked.  Karen Santorum says Rick is not anti-women while Mitt says Obama is against freedom.

Romney wins more than 50% of the vote in Illinois primary with Santorum and Gingrich trailing.  Former Governor of Florida Jeb Bush, his father Bush #1, Senator Lee of Utah, Senator Jim DeMint of South Carolina, Arizona Gov. Janice Brewer, former U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations John Bolton,  House Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy, Florida Senator Marco Rubio, Jr.Senator Ron Johnson from Wisconsin, and U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan of Wisconsin, Chairman of the House Budget Committee shows the Republican establishment overwhelmingly endorsing Mitt Romney as number one candidate for the GOP presidential nomination.

Louisiana Republican presidential primary polls show Rick leading by double digits over Mitt.  It does not look likely that former Pennsylvania Senator Santorum will gain much momentum even if he wins Louisiana’s popular vote by a wide margin.  Mitt Romney still leads in delegates for the presidential nomination.

Well Rick Santorum does win Louisiana GOP primary, and it’s here I come Pennsylvania right back where I started from.

Another “boo-boo” for Santorum who retracted comment “If Obama was re-elected for second term he would be no different than Romney.”

President Obama touting newly-produced somewhere around $345,000 Hollywood 17-minute documentary “The Road We Traveled” for his re-election campaign with movie star Tom Hanks narrating.  The film highlights “2007-2008″ economic collapse, auto industry bailout, May 2011 raid and killing in Pakistan of Osama bin Laden, the benefits of health care reform, withdrawal from Iraq, but no mention of the decision to withdraw troops by 2014 from Afghanistan.  Republican Chairman Reince Priebus says unfortunately Americans are living Obama’s accomplishments every day from high gas and food prices, health care costs, soaring unemployment and record debt.  Hollywood may not be able to find anything wrong with Obama’s first term, but Americans literally can’t afford to find out what another four years looks like under Obama’s administration.

President Obama pushing women supporting him for health care reform is now planning a solar energy tour with gas prices soaring.

Obama says in order to lower gas prices he will take away big oil companies tax breaks.  Of course it would have to be approved on Capitol Hill.

Democratic-controlled Senate rejects Republican bid for speedy approval of $7 billion Keystone pipeline from Canada to Texas.  President Obama felt Republicans did not give him enough time for a fair review before a deadline.  Pipeline supporters called it a job creator while more opponents claim it would transport “dirty oil” requiring producing huge amounts of energy.

Mobil Oil advertisement creation of 500,000 jobs are tied to Keystone pipeline.

Bipartisan Jobs Act bill promoting business growth approved on Capitol Hill.  President Obama unveils manufacturing plan.

White House planning expansion of its displaced worker program.

Obama administration funding an additional $80 million toward Alzheimer’s research work.

$25 billion settlement between five major banks for abusive practices will be filed in federal court against Bank of America, Wells Fargo, JP Morgan,  Citigroup and Ally Financial agreement after 16 months of negotiations with Justice Department, Housing and Urban Development, State Attorneys General and federal agencies.

Stocks hit 14,000 mark, the first time since “2008″ when recession took its toll on the economy, although home sales have dropped in February.  Unemployment claims fall in 29 states to a four-year low.

Netenyau: Israel reserves the right to defend itself, but will the U.S. help?  Obama administration assures Israel’s protection against an attack from Iran.  President Obama issued a statement if the U.S. is attacked by Iran with a nuclear weapon it will strike back.

Iran gives U.N. permission to view their secret nuclear military facility.  U.S. Senate hearing on Syrian killings.  President Assad says it’s the terrorists killing Syrians.  Assad’s wife, Asma Syria’s “Marie Antoinette” and other relatives are under EU sanctions freezing their assets and travel bans.  Asma went on internet shopping spree with no regard for 9,000 civilian killings.  Some 89,000 people have fled the country.  Defection of Syria’s Minister as President Assad meets with former Secretary to the United Nations Kofi Annan for peace mission.  Assad has agreed with Kofi Annan that there will be no more killings.  Still many Syrians are losing their lives while Secretary of the State Hillary Clinton reminds President Assad of the sanctions.

Obama gives warning to North Korea and Iran on nuclear weapons.

Highly-decorated, but never receiving Purple Heart accused 38-year-old U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Robert Bales married with two kids having previously served in Iraq was seen Sunday, March 11th by military officials drinking on Southern Afghanistan base crept away overnight from the military compound going on shooting spree in Kandahar villages killing and wounding 17 civilians of which nine were children, setting them on fire while they were sleeping.   Eleven belonged to one family.

Accused Staff Sgt. Robert Bales arrives stateside on Saturday, March 17th at the United States Military Penitentiary Fort Leavenworth, Kansas and placed in an isolated cell.  His attorney John Henry Browne of Seattle said he did not know if his client had been suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder at time of shootings, but could be an issue at trial if experts find it relevant.  The man went through hell injured twice in Iraq, once losing part of his foot obviously took a toll on the soldier.  Robert Bales remembered by classmates as “Bobby” the football player and neighbors from suburban Cincinnati, Ohio as a guy who was “happy-go-lucky.”  He took care of  “special needs” children and was a watchdog for neighborhood troublemakers.  Court records show the 10-year veteran had many commendations for good conduct after four years in Iraq and Afghanistan.  Wife Karilyn says he joined the Army after struggling with many financial blows which included a Florida investment job that went sour, Seattle home condemned, hardship making payments on another and about a year ago Bale’s failure to get a military promotion or a transfer.  His legal troubles include charges that he assaulted a girlfriend which he pleaded “guilty” and took anger management counseling, a hit-and run accident when he ran bleeding in military clothing into the woods, but told police “I fell asleep at the wheel” shows Bales just paid a fine to have charges dismissed.  In March, 1998 Bales was given a $65 citation for possessing alcohol in Daytona Beach, Fla. and he did not pay the fine an arrest warrant was issued for his arrest, but it expired.  In 2008 another incident arose involving alcohol of each person to the point of mumbling, slurring of speech then alleging Bales’s violence when he thrust a woman’s hand to his crotch and fought with her boyfriend outside a Tacoma, Washington bowling alley.  Deputy described Bales as “extremely intoxicated.”  Bales was also arrested in 2002 for a drunken assault on a security guard at a Tacoma casino, but that charge was dismissed after he completed 20 hours of anger management training.  More court documents show Bales owes $1.5 million from arbitration ruling a decade ago finding him “guilty” of securities fraud stemming from a complaint by Columbus, Ohio couple that Bales defrauded them while working as their stockbroker in 2003.  Soon thereafter Bales enlisted in the Army.

Former platoon leader says Bales was a “model soldier” inspired by 9/11 and in just two months after the attack, Bales enlisted to serve his country.  He saved many lives in firefights on three Iraq deployments while Army Capt. Chris Alexander says charges against Bales killing and burning many civilians in Afghanistan is out of character for him.

Accused U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Robert Bales says he has “loss of memory” killing, burning and wounding 17 Afghan civilians.  His attorney, John Henry Browne will plea “diminished capacity.”

On Friday, March 23rd a senior United States official says the military will be charging accused Army Staff Sgt. Robert Bales with 17 counts of premeditated murder plus other charges, including attempted murder in connection with the burnings, killings and wounding of Kandahar villagers.  Robert Bales could receive s life sentence or death penalty.

Bales’ wife and two children secluded on Army military base at Fort Lewis in Tacoma, Washington.  Karilyn Bales, her family and Robert Bales family are truly sad over this tragedy have extended their heartfelt sympathy to members of Afghan assassinated civilians.  With the support of Bales’ wife and extended members of his family “Staff Sgt. Robert Bales Defense Fund” was set up regarding March 11th Afghan massacre.  Bales’ wife says she can’t believe her husband would ever do such a thing.

This assassination comes on top of U.S. marines urinating on dead bodies and the apology from President Obama for Quran burning that left 30 dead further straining America’s relationship with Afghanistan.  Taliban vow revenge from Afghan civilian killings.  President Hamid Karzai makes surprise request to pull American troops out of Kandahar villages after massacre.

When Defense Secretary Panetta arrived in Afghanistan on March 14th a stolen pickup truck crashed into a ditch while driver emerged and vehicle burst into flames killing him alongside runway where Panetta’s plane was landing.  Was Defense Secretary the target of a terrorist suicide attack?

Attorney for Sgt. Robert Bales says his client is taking “Fifth Amendment” as he will not participate before Army review board as to his mental state at the time of March 11th pre-dawn massacre in two southern Afghan villages.

VP Joe Biden at a fundraiser says “Bin Laden Mission” to kill Osama was a turning point for President Obama’s re-election.

American flag with Obama’s image in place of traditional “stars” is taken down at Florida Democratic headquarters due to veterans’ outrage.

Image of Obama campaign logo purporting to show a kind of racist anti-Obama bumper sticker which reads “Don’t ReNig in 2012″ and below it “Stop Repeat Offender – Don’t Elect Obama” on back of vehicle has a lot of Facebook onlookers.

On Wednesday, March 14th, The President with First Lady Michelle Obama wearing $6,000 Marchesa strapless gown, UK Prime Minister David Cameron and his wife guests at the White House for discussions and a State dinner.  President Obama and Prime Minister Cameron held a joint news conference in the Rose Garden on Afghanistan war strategy, Iran and the global economy.

On Friday, March 16th, Actor/Activist George Clooney, his dad, NAACP President Ben Jealous and others are handcuffed and arrested outside Sudanese Embassy in Washington, D.C.  during planned protest of Sudan violence against men, women and children.

On Saturday, March 17th, President Obama who loves his Irish heritage celebrates “St. Pat’s Day” at a Washington pub.

On Sunday, March 18th Afghan Ambassador says the country trusts U.S. probe into massacre.

On Monday, March 19th First Lady Michelle Obama appears on David Letterman showing clip when she went on disguised shopping trip to Target.  A woman asked her to get an item off the shelf, but never recognized it was Michelle.  Then down to NYC Chelsea Piers owned by two close friends of George W.  Bush for bowling presidential campaign fundraiser co-hosted by Super Bowl NFL Victor Cruz with tickets going from $150 to $250 includes bowling shoes and $5,000 per VIP and shoes for five including photo reception.  68-year-old actor Robert DeNiro who introduced Michelle Obama at fundraiser has since apologized for making joking remark “Now do you really think our country is ready for a white first lady?” referring to Callista Gingrich, Karen Santorum and Ann Romney.  Michelle Obama’s press secretary said it was “inappropriate” while Ann Romney thought it was “funny” telling Piers Morgan on his talk show we should not take everyone seriously.

Obama a Harvard graduate needs a history lesson since he screwed up previous presidents and inventors.

U.S. Secret Service issue warning “No Anti-Obama Rallies.”

Argument for ObamaCare goes before Supreme Court on Monday, March 26th in which the States are fighting against “Commerce Clause” that gives Congress power mandating Americans to purchase health coverage.  Tea Party protesters rally in Washington, D.C.  Obama and his outrageous politics tries to sway Federal justices.  Health care reform will add $540 billion to deficit.

GOP candidates head to Wisconsin (a swing state) Maryland and D.C. primaries.  Obama leading in swing states with more women supporters than Santorum and Romney.

Rick Santorum lashes out at NY Times reporter stating “You misinterpreted what I was saying” when attending a Wisconsin rally.

Mitt Romney’s poke-a-joke at Michigan folks that his dad moved production to Wisconsin sparks Democratic criticism.  Romney is leading in Wisconsin.

Casino billionaire Sheldon Adelson who gave millions toward Gingrich campaign says it’s time for Newt to go.

On Tuesday, April 3rd Mitt Romney wins three states and more delegates in Wisconsin, Maryland and D.C. primaries.  It’s about time for the other guys, Santorum and Gingrich to get off the band wagon ’cause man you’re just lagging.

Canada doing away with the penny.  United States wondering if  it should do away with the annoying currency.

On April 3rd Sarah Palin gets a shot at co-hosting the “Today” show.  Gal power takes over Matt Lauer.  Matt signed another long-term contract with NBC confirming he’s staying with the “Today” family.  On April 4th Katie Couric filled in for “Good Morning America” plugging away scoring higher ratings than “Today.”

On April 4th Army criminal investigators completed their first visit to the outpost where Sgt. Robert Bales served and the two villages where he allegedly killed 17 Afghan civilians.  Officials are not identifying or discussing the evidence they gathered due to the extreme sensitivity of this investigation nor say when they will be returning due to their safety in the vicinity.

On April 4th and 5th, President Obama will be holding bill-signing ceremonies on small business financing (Jobs Act) and insider trading laws at the White House for legislation in public and in the presence of lawmakers who helped pass it.

U.S. manufacturing continues to rebound as the economy is still in recovery.  Figures for March, 2012 shows slow employment growth at 8.2% with job woes as people have stopped searching for work.

Bill Clinton joining President Obama for campaign fundraiser.

Rick Santorum taking Easter break before he returns to campaigning.  He’s meeting with GOP conservative leaders on Newt Gingrich strategy how they can convince him on quitting.

Health Care “Think Tank” founded by Newt Gingrich files for Chapter 7 bankruptcy.  Liabilities are between $1 million and $10 million with only $100,000 in business assets.

Ed Gillespie, a political strategist has been hired as Mitt Romney’s campaign senior adviser.  Three GOP Texas Congressmen back Romney.

The writing is on the wall that it’s time for Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich to plan their exit strategy.

Rick Santorum takes an Easter break from campaigning and to see his 3-year-old daughter, Isabella who has been hospitalized for chronic genetic condition.

“SNL” celebrates the Easter weekend making fun at Romney.

On Monday, April 9th the First Family will host 134th Annual “Easter Roll at the White House.”  There will be singing, dancing, games, stories and bunnies.

Pope gives Easter message to Syrian leader to stop massacre.

On Tuesday, April 10th with the odds against Rick Santorum, his family beside him, announced suspending presidential campaign and the good news that hospital released daughter, Bella who is doing much better.

Mitt Romney could steal Santorum’s social appeal.  Romney plans to campaign with Santorum.   Indian-American Louisiana Governor supports Romney for presidential nominee.  Newt Gingrich’s $500 check bounces as candidate tried to get on Utah primary.

Romney trying to woo young and older women voters while Hilary Rosen, Democratic strategist slams Mitt’s wife, Ann Romney for being a “stay-at-home mom”  and “actually never had to work a day in her life.”  Hilary Rosen apologizes to Ann Romney for insulting her.  First Lady Michelle Obama sticks up for Ann Romney.  Democrats are ashamed of being connected to the Hilary Rosen name.

Veep Joe Biden puts his “two cents in” slamming Romney’s tax plan.

Romney says never again “Pooch on car Roof.”  “Doggies won’t be voting for Romney.”

On Thursday, April 5th State of Connecticut overwhelming  repeals death penalty.  It is now the “17th” state to abolish this capital punishment.

Real Estate Magnate Donald Trump tells Fox News that Obama’s lack of leadership and unreasonable push for alternative energy sources with reluctance to drill as there is plenty of natural resources in our own country instead of beholding to foreign interests, we are now seeing high gas prices killing the U.S. economy.

The United States government paid $50,000 in compensation to each Afghan civilian killed during shooting spree by Staff Sgt. Robert Bales Army soldier.  Families of the dead received the money on Saturday, March 24th at the governor’s office said Kandahar official.  Each wounded person received $11,000 and community elder confirmed the same figures.  Families were told money came from Barack Obama, President of the United States of America.

U.S. sanctions Iran’s exporting oil and any foreign country aiding Syria while Canada sanctions Assad’s wife Asma and family.  President Assad agrees to cease firing, but so far nothing is happening says Kofi Annan, Secretary-General to United Nations  on peace mission.  Kofi Annan now says cease firing is holding and steps up pressure on Iran.  There are still pockets of fighting and killing in Syria.

North Korea set to launch three-stage rocket has been condemned by the international community.  Rocket falls apart and lands in the sea.  Fear draws near whether next rocket blast off will be nuclear.and hit the northern hemisphere.

On the weekend of April 15th, Obama investigating “hanky-panky” by 12 secret service agents and 12 U.S. military men who were put on paid administrative leave, stripped of their equipment and sent back to U.S. after alleged misconduct over sex parties with prostitutes at a hotel in Columbia just before president’s arrival to an important summit.  Guys were interested in screwing than working.  Congressional leaders wonder how “sexual activity”  affected national security.

Obama administration wants Congress to act calling for tougher penalties on oil market manipulation.

Photo of two U.S. airborne men along with Afghan police holding  mangled body of a suicide bomber is extremely distressing to U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta who calls it foolish while Pres. Karzai says it’s disgusting.

Speaker of the House John Boehner and Arizona Senator Jon Kyl endorses Romney as presidential nominee while Senator Marc Rubio will be campaigning for Romney.  John MCain joins forces with Romney to unite GOP party.

Santorum is $2 million in campaign debt while Gingrich is $4.3 in the red.  Ron Paul will hold on until GOP convention.

Romney leading Obama with independent voters.  Obama faces a tight race.  Senator Marc Rubio of Florida looks like the chosen one for VP nominee.

On Monday, April 23rd President Obama pays visit to Holocaust Museum for “Holocaust Remembrance Day.”

On Tuesday, April 24th Mitt Romney wins “Northeast” primary.  Newt Gingrich quits presidential race and says he will endorse Mitt Romney.

Strategic agreement to be signed by President Barack Obama and Hamid Karzai between U.S. and Afghanistan outlining their partnership for withdrawing combat troops from their country.

Supreme Court favors Arizona immigration law.  Senate passes “fix-it” plan for Postal Service operations.

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke sees U.S. economy slowly recovering, but job market is far from normal.  More Americans are seeing their dream of home ownership fading.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry who is thinking of running for the presidency in “2016″ switches endorsement from Newt Gingrich to Mitt Romney the presidential nominee.

VP Biden slams Romney’s foreign policy on Iran.  He says the President has a “big stick.”  Has Biden seen Obama’s pr**k?

Rick Santorum will be socializing with Jay Leno while Romney is debating hosting “SNL” as a celebrity or just do what he does best, be his plain old “wealthy” self.

Obama playing up death of “Bin Laden” anniversary taking you into the White House Situation Room.  He criticizes Mitt Romney for saying “It’s too much money to kill one person.”

Looks like Trump “The Grump” is at it again this time stomping all over Scotland’s renewable energy turbine wind farm to be built right next door to his golf course.  They (Former and Present Ministers of Scotland) gave their word that the windfarm project would never happen.   Trump is threatening to sue Scottish government.

Rush Limbaugh is always mocking somebody – This time it’s Hillary.  He says she’s “Secretary of State” – She’s still a “secretary.”  Well Rush, Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State gets to negotiate our foreign relations.  Limbaugh that’s more powerful than your spreading sexist hate on your radio show.

U.S. stepping up drone attacks in Yemen to combat al-Qaeda growing threat.

Obama might be in “dog house” after some sharp remarks at White House Correspondents’ Dinner, but neither Trump nor New Jersey Gov.  Chris Christie are angry at Obama and late night host Jimmy Kimmel joking comments.

Former NYC Mayor Rudy Guiliani and Mitt Romney getting together for a “Better America” as a GOP team.  NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg having private meeting with Romney.

President Obama’s new campaign slogan “Forward” certainly looks like he stole title from CNN’s “Lean Forward.”  It actually should be titled “Backward” in view of the declining economy.

On Tuesday, May 1st the death anniversary of Osama bin Laden, President Obama makes “unannounced” trip arriving in the darkness at Afghanistan airport meeting with President Karzai to sign long-term strategic partnership.  Just a few hours after Obama left secretly three suicide attackers struck a heavily guarded housing complex in Kabul claiming seven lives, Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid sent message by cellphone stating responsibility.

Blind Chinese activist wants to kiss Hillary arranging a deal for his safety at U.S. Embassy, but is now asking Obama to help him come to America.  Clinton applauds China for allowing blind activist Chen Guangcheng the opportunity for applying to study in U.S.  Chen was offered fellowship from NYU law school.

Keeping up with Michelle Obama, Ann Romney’s new $1,000 designer blouse.  Looks like she’s ready to become First Lady of the White House.

Newt Gingrich officially announces ending presidential campaign, but still has “moon colony” vision.  Romney not expecting Santorum supporting him.

Michele Bachmann Minnesota Congresswoman says she’s “honored” to be backing Romney as presidential nominee after saying she was the conservative favorite of the Tea Party.

Latino actress Rosario Dawson says Romney looks appealing as GOP nominee.

Catching Mitt joking making fun of Obama’s new campaign slogan “Forward” – What over the cliff?  “Progress” would be a better fit says Mitt.

April jobs report suggests the economy is slowing as employers hired less workers than expected.  Although jobless rate stands at 8.1 percent Romney says there will be no celebration until it drops to 4 percent unemployment.

Former President Bill Clinton becomes Obama’s cheerleader.

President Obama and wife Michelle on campaign trail in battleground swing-states of Ohio and Virginia.  Obama talks “jobs and economy” at high-tech college in Albany.

Things you should know about the White House and its construction beginning in 1792 where John Adams was first president to take residence on November 1, 1800, a grand mansion in neo-classical federal style with details of Greek architecture and modeled after the Leinster House in Dublin, Ireland is constantly being renovated (contains three floors) faces north and sits opposite Lafayette Square Park honoring Marquis de Lafayette, hero of the American Revolution is valued at $110 million with 20 acres of land surrounded by gardens, a putting green, tennis and basketball courts, swimming pool, bowling alley, family dining room, state dining room, pastry kitchen, butler’s pantry, red, blue, green and east rooms, calligraphy office, first lady’s office, advisers’ offices, cabinet room, underground bunker, press room, situation room, family theater. game room, top floor includes a music room, billiards, workout room and solarium.  There are 132 rooms, 35 bathrooms, 412 doors, 28 fireplaces and 3 elevators.

Veep Biden speaks on “Meet the Press” and says he supports marriage equality while President Obama still stands for a “Man and Woman” in matrimony.

On May 19th First Lady will put out White House welcome mat for spouses of foreign leaders and a visit to Michelle Obama’s hometown of Chicago while the President invites G-8 leaders to Camp David.

Romney and Obama now face-to-face in tight presidential race.

There’s no stalling Ron Paul as he’s still in the presidential race until the convention.  Paul once and for all it’s time for you to exit as your winning streak has peaked!

Santorum sends “nighty-night” email endorsing Mitt Romney.  It’s too late for debates – I lost to the best candidate!

Romney wins three more primaries in Indiana, North Carolina and West Virginia securing close to 65 percent of the vote getting closer to landing 1,144 delegates for the presidential candidate.

Voters in North Carolina approve constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, civil unions and domestic partnerships.  It’s a political hot issue across the country with at least 50% of voters recognizing gay marriage, but so far there are 38 states that have banned same-sex marriage.

On Wednesday, May 9th Obama makes a landmark announcement as the first president supporting same-sex marriage which he says Michelle played a role in his decision.  He was under pressure from gay rights advocates who are definitely fundraisers.  The President says it’s still up to the States for voters to approve a constitutional amendment, but I believe every American has the right to equality.  Conservative religious groups and Cardinal Timothy Dolan disagree on same-sex marriage as the church believes matrimony is between a man and a woman.  VP Joe Biden “beating Obama to the punch” gives apology for same-sex marriage controversy.

Celebrities like Jane Lynch, Tyra Banks, Josh Groban, Rachel Zoe, Susie Orman and Ellen DeGeneres were tweeting thanking Barack Obama for supporting gay marriage equality.

Mitt Romney says he does not acknowledge “same-sex marriage” but does not see anything wrong in gay couples adopting.  Speaking at Liberty University in Virginia an evangelical college Romney tells graduates he believes that “Marriage is a relationship between one man and one woman.”

Romney accused of “high school bullying” in his young heydays says he doesn’t remember, apologizes for any wrongdoing.

Newt Gingrich campaigning with Romney, but we don’t know if Rick will be joining the dynamic duo.

On May 10th actor George Clooney holds fundraiser dinner at his Hollywood Hills home for Obama’s re-election netting close to $15 million.  Obama will be attending “LGBT” fundraiser dinner.

First Lady gives commencement speech at Virginia Tech to more than 5,000 graduates trying to set aside the school tragedy.

President Obama’s new $25 million dollar ad campaign is promoting economic policies in Spanish and English swaying the Latino voter.

On May 14th singer Ricky Martin at the Rubin Museum of Art in NYC hosting $5,000 to $35,000.00 tickets for Obama fundraiser “LGBT” dinner.  The Prez says “I want everybody treated fairly.”

In the midst of national controversy the Governor of Rhode Island signs executive order recognizing same-sex marriages performed in other states entitling both partners to health and life insurance benefits.

“I’m a proud American” says Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann who is giving up her Swiss citizenship.

President Karzai says he does not see Afghanistan as a safe country by signing strategic agreement with United States.

Confidential U.N. report reveals Iran shipping arms to the Syrian government in violation of weapon sales ban.

In the trial of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak which began in December, 2011 and lasted until January, 2012, the defense strategy was that Mubarak never resigned his presidency and therefore had immunity.  The judge said a verdict would be announced on June 2nd.

Unemployment benefits will end for about 200,000 Americans who were hoping for an extension.

JP Morgan Chase is a disgrace.  The largest bank in the United States lost $3 billion in just two months and now their stock has plunged.  They were invested in hedge funds.  FBI investigates Chase.  As voter anger still surrounds those big bank bailouts including greedy Wall Street, Obama administration waging war on tougher regulations.

Obama has a lot of nerve calling Romney a “job-killer vampire” when in fact the President wants to change America’s sexual behavior labeling himself as our “savior.”  Lesser of two evils – Romney the vampire or Obama’s empire?

Romney easily wins Nebraska and Oregon primaries edging closer to the GOP presidential nominee.

Mitt Romney and the RNC raised $40.1 million in April nearly tying Obama’s $46.3 million in campaign fundraisers.

Former GOP presidential candidate Herman Cain once the CEO of Godfather’s Pizza endorses Mitt Romney.

President Obama proposes 10 percent tax credit for small businesses to promote hiring and bring back jobs from overseas.

Catholic colleges are not pleased with Obamacare law and are waging a war.

25,000 jobs are at stake as post offices close throughout the United States.

Blind Chinese activist looking extremely happy arriving in NYC with his family.

On Friday, May 18th G8 leaders meet with President Obama at Camp David, Maryland for international summit to discuss Greece and world economy.

Whether it’s the economy, terrorism, the war in Afghanistan and post-war Iraq most of us tend to look back over the last 9 years of death and tears.  Iran’s nuclear program is still our biggest fear.  Are all the GOP candidates making their policies clear?

It’s important to listen to each candidate’s mission for we all have to go to the polls on November 6th, 2012 and make the right decision.  Who will get the job done?  Soldiers come back from Iraq while McCain says the Afghan war can be won.  Iraqi civilians are still being killed.  Our soldiers have been fighting and dying in these foreign countries.  We also have to worry about the iron hand of Iran and their nuclear threat to American soil and the rest of the world.  Al-Qaeda plans worldwide suicide attacks during the Christmas holiday.  Watch out you sneaky rats the United States, Britain and Europe will strike back.

So what’s going to happen to our Social Security system and health care?  Who’s looking after our welfare?  Will the Social Security age be raised?  Are we heading toward the prison of socialism with all these government programs?  Do politicians really give a damn?  Let’s make room for the next generation of baby boomers.

People still search for work and perks.  Due to outsourcing most manufacturing jobs have disappeared over the years.  Bailouts and stimulus money did absolutely nothing to move the economy.  It’s no surprise our deficit is on the rise.  American workers and corporations seek tax relief.  What’s your beef?

Most Democrats have been axed.  Republicans take over the House.  Nancy Pelosi the gaveling lady is now Minority Speaker of the House.  Dems wanted her out.

Remember, this is more than a personality contest.  The person you select must do his or her best.  The rest is up to you.  Choose the better candidate to keep this country great.

© Copyright 2011 – 2012

Created by (Francke) the Lyrical Yankee

Political Satire (For all the news that’s fit to rhyme in rap time)

All Rights Reserved

LADY LIBERTY – THE AMERICAN DREAM – “GIVE ME YOUR TIRED, YOUR POOR,  I LIFT MY LAMP BESIDE THE GOLDEN DOOR.”

CELEBRATING STATUE OF LIBERTY “125TH” BIRTHDAY

* * * * * * * *

WAR ON GREEDY STREET VS. MAIN STREET INEQUALITY

(99% vs. 1%)

“OWS” movement began on September 17, 2011 at Zuccotti Park located in New York City’s financial district initiated by a Canadian activist group named “Adbusters” led to protests to be non-violent, picketing, internet activities and demonstrations globally.  The main issues are social and economic inequality, greed, corruption and the undue influence of corporations on government, in particular banking reform and the financial services sector.  “OWS” slogan “We are the 99%” addresses growing inequality and wealth distribution in the United States between the wealthiest 1% and the rest of the population.

* * * * * * * *

No dough – No jobs – No homes – No cars – We’re not slobs!

Government bails out AIG the insurance boss who took a huge financial loss and Goldman Sachs Global Banking and Securities on the backs of taxpayers’ money.  Middle Class get it up the ass while the poor are trashed.  If this is equality then what is democracy?  When Wall Street and banks run the country with their Democratic and Republican cronies.  “The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.”

“Occupy Wall Street Beef”

The economic catastrophe began on September 17, 2011 as thousands of U.S. activists and anti-war demonstrators camp out and march in Zuccotti (privately-owned) Park while “Occupy Wall Street” is spreading across the country and globally protesting corporate greed, jobs and poverty.  Police arrest 700 protesters for rallying on Brooklyn Bridge while motorists are ticked off waiting in stalled traffic.

Teamster labor unions and Democrats backing Wall Street protesters.  Republican candidate Herman Cain says protests are anti-American.  He tells them to go home, get a job, get a life but protesters still continue to fight for their rights.  Will this infringe upon Cain’s presidential nomination?  President Obama says he understands American’s frustration.  Feisty Minority House Speaker Nancy Pelosi says “God bless them for their spontaneity.”  VP Joe Biden sees the protesters much like the Smarty Tea Party.  U.S. District Rep. Barney Frank from Massachusetts, Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke sympathize with testy protesters.  Mayor Bloomberg says the mobs of protesters are trying to ruin NYC jobs, but it’s okay for them to stay as long as they behave.  Republican House Majority Leader Eric Cantor refers to protesters as a “mob squad.”  Former Mass. Gov. Mitt Romney does not condone protesters and says it’s the wrong way to go.  Glenn Beck former Fox newscaster says protesters are like “killer capitalists.”  Filmmaker Michael Moore and Obama have become whores of the poor.  While they both agree with protesters’ economic distress, Moore in the 1% category has made millions from his films and President Obama’s bailout policy for greedy Wall Street.  Former NYC Mayor Rudy Guiliani says “OWS” movement is for bums and hippies.  When asked about “OWS” protesters conservative republican candidate Newt Gingrich said “Go get a job after you take a bath.”  Protesters dressed in white bath robes react to Newt’s crude attitude.

Jay-Z on “Occupy All Streets”

Producer and Hip-Hop Rapper artist Jay-Z says he doesn’t mind paying more income taxes for education and people in poverty as long as there’s transparency where the money is going.  However Rapper Jay-Z  “Scrooge this Christmas” by selling “Occupy All Streets” t-shirts on his Rocawear company website was told by a spokesman of “OWS” that profiting  from social cause is an insult to it’s fight for economic civil rights.  The “Rocawear” company who has since taken the t-shirts off its website had no intention on donating any proceeds to “OWS.”

Brokers celebrate “Let them eat cake”

Wall Street brokers celebrate with champagne and wine which seems to indicate “Let them eat cake.”  Protesters told to clean up is canceled, but they won’t shut up!  “Occupy Wall Street” movement grows from lower Manhattan to the elite east side of Park Avenue Millionaires Row.  More protesters are arrested as they head to Times Square for allegedly defying police authority. NYC protesters march to Office of District Attorney.  Rowdy protester throws powder on Geraldo Rivera Fox newscaster. Violent protester uprisings, crimes, drugs, rapes and killings are seen in a number of American cities and foreign countries.

“Attack Goldman Sachs”

On Friday, October 14th in Milan, Italy hundreds of protesters attacking Goldman Sachs financial district building came storming into hallways with their anger posted at Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi screaming “Give Us Money” when they were confronted and arrested by police and security.  Now that Economist Mario Monti has been nominated as Prime Minister after Berlusconi resigned hopefully the country will be on the road to recovery.

“Clean Up Zuccotti”

On Thursday, October 20th protesters finally clean up “Zuccotti Park” in lower Manhattan with actor Alec Baldwin pitching in.  Neighborhood residents hold meetings complaining about protesters noisy and unsanitary conditions affecting them and their school children.

Brookfield Properties the owners of  Zuccotti Park tell protesters they must leave before Friday, October 21st so they can do some maintenance and cleaning.  Protesters believe it means they will be stopped from demonstrating.  New York City Mayor Bloomberg reminds them that under the First Amendment clause there’s freedom of speech for every American citizen.

“Thousands Rally Against Seedy Corporate Greed”

Thousands of demonstrators wearing all kinds of “OWS” getups with police in riot gear rally against corporate greed in NYC’s Times Square and theater district.

“Delivery for Corporate Greed”

On Friday, October 28th some 400 Zuccotti Park marching protesters, activists and homeowners deliver thousands of letters individually and via website occupytheboardroom.org addressed to Wall Street executives and banking institutions across New York City stating “corporate greed” that caused homeowners into foreclosure and loss of jobs from your bad policies.

“Irate Manhattan Lawmakers Objection to Protesters”

Manhattan lawyers representing downtown neighborhoods and Zuccotti Park owner send letter to Mayor Bloomberg stating their objection to “OWS” protesters’ demonstrating with excessive noisy drumming, public urinating and barricades preventing pedestrian traffic.  Bringing their grievances to City Hall a group of people and businesses are planning counter-protests against Zuccotti Park “OWS” protesters.

“Tax the Rich Bitch”

While “Occupy Wall Street” movement has been hollering “Tax the Rich” as their main cause the group has received donations totaling more than half a million in tax exempt dollars.  “Alliance for Justice Global Group” backing protest movement says those  donating to “Occupy Wall Street” can deduct the amount from their federal income taxes.

“Occupy Globally”

On Friday, October 21st from marching around London’s Stock Exchange protesters are seen camping out and shouting their grievances near the historical landmark St. Paul’s Cathedral which had to close their doors to the public due to noise, rubbish and protester’s use of the church as a latrine inside and outside the building.  Employees had to take mops to clean up the slop.  Cathedral and authorities halt filing legal action for protesters’ eviction as anti-capitalists agreed to leave.  Tents and sleeping gear were supposed to be removed, but protesters have done nothing to alleviate conditions so authorities and the Cathedral are initiating legal proceedings.  On Wednesday, January 18, 2012 London protesters finally lose court battle on eviction.

“Occupy Chicago”

On Sunday, October 23, 2011 noisy and shouting anti-Wall Street demonstrators “Occupy Chicago’s Grant Park” are ordered by police to remove themselves from the streets.  130 people were arrested and charged with criminal trespass after defying Grant City Park closing time.

“Occupy Greed Street”

On Monday, October 24th “Occupy Greed Street” protesters tell big banks to “take a haircut” as barbers leave their shop and go to Zuc-cutti Park clipping their beards and locks.  What this means is that a bank takes a loss when a homeowner defaults.  Guys wearing plastic ponchos displaying bank names and logos in white lettering shouting how institutions punish people who don’t pay their bills including their ill-will towards people not being able to borrow money.  Protesters want banks to help people that made loans not lose their homes.

“Occupy Slam Oakland”

On Wednesday, October 25th thousands of peaceful protesters took to streets of Oakland, California after a violent confrontation on Tuesday when hundreds of protesters camping out in a downtown City Hall plaza were told to remove themselves threw objects at officers were arrested after clashing with police who dispersed plastic bullets and tear gas.  A two-time Iraq war veteran was injured in the incident by an alleged shot to his head from a police projectile and taken to the local hospital in a critical state then upgraded to fair condition.  Mayor Jean Quan apologizes for another Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran who received lacerated spleen injuries and inappropriate treatment from protesters.  Nearby neighborhoods have had enough of the rowdy drumming protest stuff.  The protesters intend to hold a citywide strike on November 2nd and support for Scott Olsen, Iraq war veteran who suffered brain damage still unable to talk.  Many Oakland businesses like “Men’s Wearhouse” stand behind the “OWS” 99%.  On Monday, November 12th eviction of protesters by police in riot gear arrested 33 people and took down tents in the encampment.  It’s far from over for more than 400 protesters were arrested Saturday January 28, 2012 for their violent behavior injuring police officers, breaking into a vacant convention center, YMCA, breaking glass at City Hall and burning American flags.  Mayor Quan and other city officials are fed up with the testy occupiers.  On Monday, February 27, 2012 law enforcement officers suffered minor injuries, but one was hit in the face and taken to the hospital during a clash with members of occupy movement at the Sacramento State Capitol.  Police were escorting 35 members of the South African Project to a parking garage after their protest.  50 members of the Occupy Oakland threw bottles and cans at the officers and South African group.

“Occupy Rattle Seattle”

On Wednesday, November 3rd hundreds of protesters are pepper sprayed while multiple arrests were made by police after pounding on cop cars and storming into JP Morgan Chase Bank Building screaming “Destroying the American Dream.”  After dark protesters marched to the downtown Sheraton Hotel where CEO Jamie Dimon of Chase was a keynote speaker at a business leadership dinner as chanting began “Banks got bailed out – We got sold out.”

“Peaceful to Violent Occupy D.C.”

On Tuesday, November 8th top D.C. police brass visit McPherson Square where they talked to protesters about their first amendment rights and protecting pedestrian safety in the streets and walkways.  Protesters preach for peace, but police are assigned to mounted horses making sure demonstrators march on sidewalks not in the streets.  An incident on Friday, November 4th sees demonstrators blocking traffic and acting violently,  Then a 75-year-old lady was knocked down cement steps coming out of the Washington Conference Center holding special event on “Americans for Prosperity Dinner.”  Mayor Vince Gray and D.C. Police Chief Kathy Lainer tell protesters they will not tolerate jeopardizing public safety.  On November 22nd “Occupy the Highway” protesters who left Zuccotti reach D.C. after marching 231 mile stretch of cold concrete meet in McPherson Square to rally.  On Sunday, December 4th protesters in McPherson Square Park since October 1st built a pavilion called “The People’s Wooden Structure” are asked to dismantle it defying police orders were arrested and taken into custody.  On Sunday, January 29, 2012 after months of posting fliers on Federal rule banning tent camping in two city parks defiant protesters will be violators.  On Sunday, February 5th occupiers do not think it is fair as police in hazmut suits take down tents in Freedom Plaza and McPherson Square.

“OWS Veterans Day Concert”

On Friday November 11th “OWS” protesters will be honoring the heroes who fought for our country with a “Veterans Day” concert in New York City.

“Occupy Portland Protesters Ticked Off By Eviction”

On Sunday, November 13th thousands of protesters and homeless people looking for food and shelter who have not left a city park are told by police in riot gear to leave on eviction notice signed by Mayor Sam Adams due to unhealthy conditions, drug users and stealing.  Protesters say they have been “peaceful” yet 50 people were arrested.

“NYC Police Remove Protesters from Zuccotti”

On Tuesday, November 13th around 1:00 a.m. hundreds of NYC police with flood lights make a clean sweep of Zuccotti.  They removed and arrested 200 protesters who refused to leave.  Protesters sang Beatles song “Revolution.”  City Mayor Michael Bloomberg says every effort was made to avoid confrontation, but after two-month encampment there were safety and quality of life issues which was prime decision to clear protesters from Zuccotti. While private park was supposed to reopen for protesters at 8:00 a.m. a court order prevented them from entering.  Protesters head to old Trinity Church near Canal Street and then to Tribeca and Soho district where they previously rallied for protesters in Oakland.  In the meantime New York Lawyers’ Guild have obtained an injunction against Brookfield Properties setting Tuesday for a hearing on the grounds that City officials had no right to establish rules after protesters began camping and marching in the park.  Manhattan Supreme Court Justice Michael Stallman cancels restraining order with a revision that protesters can march, but not camp out with sleeping bags, generators or tarps inside the park.  Judge agrees with Mayor Bloomberg and other city officials including U.S. Representative for New York’s 3rd Congressional District Peter King that safety and unsanitary conditions were an issue.  Mayor Mike Bloomberg says the city will still be fighting to get protesters out of Zuccotti.  “OWS” protesters go to police station to pick up their stuff.  On Wednesday, November 14th a protester is arrested after posting YouTube video threatening to fire bomb the city.

Shut down “NYSE” D-Day on Two-Month Anniversary

On Thursday November 15th around 7:00 a.m. thousands of protesters meet to shut down NYSE at 11 Wall Street.  They intend to be inside subway stations when the morning rush hour leaves the underground.  Service Employees International Union join protesters and go down to City Hall and then the Brooklyn Bridge with its festival of lights onto a pedestrian walk where they’ll be marching and chanting.  In the early morning hours a protester threw some type of liquid which might have been vinegar at the faces of 4 policemen while another cop got hit in the hand with a piece of glass and received 20 stitches were all taken by ambulance to Bellevue Hospital.  New York City police say 400 protesters were arrested when they blocked traffic and trucks making deliveries near Pine, Canal and Liberty.  Mobs of protesters were heard shouting “F**k You Bloomberg.”  Oscar-winning “Fargo” actress Frances McDormand seen among the crowd of protesters did not speak with reporters.  Brokers and office workers were also blocked from entering 40 Wall Street the Deutsche Bank building.  Demonstrators threw down barricades at Zuccotti then made their way to Foley Square where hundreds chanted “All day, All week Wall Street.”  Others shouted we need work wearing “99″ t-shirts.  San Francisco protesters stormed into a Bank of America branch located in the city’s downtown financial district and in Los Angeles 500 protesters paraded in front of Wells Fargo Plaza shouting “Banks got bailed out, we got sold out.”  The “OWS” movement in Portland, Houston, Chicago, St. Louis, Arizona, Miami, Tampa, Boston, Philadelphia and D.C. rallied for economic inequality while protesters at a Dallas camp were evicted.  In Denver 17 people were arrested at Civic Center Park and three activists charged with felonies.  San Francisco’s University of California Police Chief on leave after two campus policemen pepper spray peaceful protesters which is now under investigation.  University of California Chancellor Linda Katehi apologizes to protesters for pepper spraying.  Victims’ medical bills for pepper spraying incident will be paid by the university.  There were many rallies, evictions and arrests held in at least 30 U.S. cities including foreign countries.

“Kicked out of Zuccotti”

On Sunday, November 20th “OWS” protesters made their way uptown to Mayor Bloomberg’s swanky Fifth and Madison Avenue mansion chanting, but were blocked by police from drumming.  Neighbors had to show I.D. as police put up barricades surrounding the street so protesters could not enter.  Mayor Bloomberg says protesters should vent their anger at Capitol Hill not the banking industry.  It’s estimated that protesters have cost the nation’s taxpayers $13 million.

“Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade”

Whoppi Goldberg of “The View” says protesters should not interfere with the Macy’s Thanksgiving Float Parade.  This holiday is where every girl and boy look forward to celebrate and enjoy spectacular helium balloons with Santa strolling down the avenue.

“Hearty Thanksgiving in Zuccotti Park”

This time instead of protesting Thanksgiving meals with all the trimmings were given out to 500 people by volunteers near Zuccotti.  It was a festival of entertainment with music and guitar playing, but police stopped the drumming.  You could hear the chanting “Shop small businesses on Black Friday – Stay away from major retail chains.”

“Now Occupy This Album” to Benefit Movement

Legendary music artists released an album dedicating “99 tracks and 99 artists for the 99 percent” with Bob Dylan singing his 1964 protest anthem, “The Times They Are A Changin” supporting and benefiting protesters.  They hope to raise $1 million for the cause.  The money will be donated to “Occupy Wall Street” Fund and other major occupations across the country.

“Tea Party Activists vs. Occupy Nation Movement”

“OWS” protesters are at the crossroads after being tossed out of Zuccotti and other city parks, but dismantling tents is not the end of 99 percent.  Their movement has just begun, a war against the political rich that must be fixed.  Tea Party and “OWS” both agree that things cannot get done either by Democrats or Republicans in Washington.  New Jersey Governor Chris Christie says President Obama is just a “bystander” not a “leader.”  Boston Tea Party movement has been around for awhile starting with our Founding Fathers in the 17th century.  It still stands for controlling government spending while OWS protest greedy bankers and Wall Street.  The time has come for everyone to get together and select a candidate who will get the job done leading America into prosperity.

“From Zuccotti to Manhattan Office Buildings”

With donations pouring in the “OWS” movement has set up office space in lower Manhattan.  They are also considering an Art and Cultural Center somewhere in Brooklyn.

“Irate Protesters on Obama’s Manhattan Fundraiser”

Irate protesters came marching and drumming in front of the Sheraton Hotel in NYC where Obama had a fundraiser for $1,000 to $36,000 a plate.  Protesters chanting “That money should go toward job creation not campaigning.”

“Occupy Wall Street Uses its Might for Trinity Hunger Strike”

Occupy Wall Streeters is using its might by going on a hunger strike in an effort to convince Trinity Episcopal Church to use a vacant piece of land it owns on Canal and Sixth Avenue in lower Manhattan.  Should they be arrested the protesters will continue their hunger strike behind bars calling on occupiers to join their cause across the nation.

“Brookfield Properties Owe Tax Money”

It seems that Brookfield Properties owe the City of New York a whopping $139,000 in unpaid businesses taxes from 2006 to 2009 so it would be wise for Mayor Mike Bloomberg to distance himself from the owners of Zuccotti.

“Occupiers Shout Take Back the People’s House”

From December 5th-9th the 99% will vent their anger at Washington’s congressional leaders on Capitol Hill.  With unemployment benefits ending, payroll tax extension expiring, some 14 million people out of work who have lost everything including homes they once owned protesters march the halls for justice sitting outside or inside Senate offices shouting you must represent us not greedy corporations and the wealthy.

“Protester Gets Foot in the Door”

Tracy Postert, a 30-year-old Upper West Side resident “OWS” protester since October with a PH.D in Pharmacology was serving sandwiches and cleaning sidewalks around Zuccotti.  Tracy pounded the concrete streets for 15 days carrying a sign “I need a job, ask me for my resume.”  A passerby with the John Thomas Brokerage Firm on Wall Street hired Tracy as a junior analyst.  She’s now making a five figure salary.

“Occupy Movement Force Shut Down of West Coast Ports”

From Anchorage to San Diego the Occupy Movement marches to shut down West Coast shipping facilities.

“Protesters disrupt Iowa Republican Caucus Headquarters”

Eighteen protesters were arrested and given misdemeanors when they demonstrated and disrupted the Iowa campaign Presidential headquarters of Republican candidates Michelle Bachmann, Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum.

“Occupiers’ set American flags on Fire “

On Friday, December 30th four male occupiers were arrested at a Charlotte, North Carolina encampment after setting two American flags on fire.  It is not illegal to burn an American flag, but the fire caused damage as firefighters were called in to douse the flames occupiers were jailed and charged with misdemeanors.

“Actress threatened on New Year’s Eve by NYPD”

57-year-old Ellen Barkin renowned actress who happens to live in the downtown area tweeted that on her way home she was stopped and shoved by a New York cop when 68 occupiers were arrested on New Year’s Eve taking down barricades as they tried once again to invade Zuccotti Park.  There were mounted police on the streets.  One police officer was stabbed and taken by ambulance to a hospital.

“Occupiers’ Octopus Float Jolts Pasadena Rose Bowl”

2011 ended with some 200 occupiers marching and chanting “We want economic justice” planned to jolt Rose Bowl Tournament of Roses Parade attaching a replica of the Constitution on an Octopus float made of recycled plastic tentacles representing Wall Street greed.  Occupiers were told by police if there was any parade disruption they could be arrested.  It was a peaceful demonstration.

“Occupy protesters trash Christie & Romney at N.H. rally”

Hard core “Occupy Wall Street” protesters at New Hampshire rally yelling at Christie and Romney how they kill jobs were promptly escorted out the door.  The 99% spoke out against Mitt Romney as a wealthy millionaire which Christie quickly attacked right back.  Gov. Chris Christie pointed out that he created 60,000 jobs in his State of New Jersey and Mitt Romney has always been for jobs and private industry.  Christie put one girl protester in line by saying “Sweetheart if anyone killed jobs it’s Obama’s administration” not the Republicans.

“Wall Street Protesters take back NYC’s Zuccotti”

On Tuesday evening, January 10th security guards working for the owners Brookfield Properties took down metal barricades at Zuccotti.  More than 200 protesters re-entered the park, but were not allowed sleeping bags or to lay around on the ground, although some were seen lying down.  The Civil Liberties Union fighting for their Constitutional rights as lawyers had filed papers with the city.

“Protesters praise Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. Legacy”

On Monday, January 16th protesters marched across the nation in celebration of civil rights leader Rev. Marin Luther King, Jr. and  his legacy on his 83rd birthday.  A man who stood for peace, the underprivileged, unions for all classes and poor people in foreign countries.  Today things have greatly changed with a worldwide depression that has brought economic inequality for millions no matter what color or creed.

“White House alarmed by apparent Smoke Bomb”

On Tuesday, January 17th hundreds of occupy protesters gathered outside the White House protesting Congress when some kind of a smoke bomb was thrown over iron gate which luckily President Obama and First Lady were out celebrating her “48th” birthday.  White House and the grounds went into lock down.

“Occupiers Dump Condoms in Rhode Island”

“OWS” protesters vent their issues as they crashed and trashed a “Pro-Life” event dumping condoms from a third floor balcony on Catholic school girls in a Rhode Island Capitol building.  People had a tough time speaking at the rally with all the protesters shouting,  Police were outnumbered so no one was “arrested or busted.”

“Smart to Trademark”

Long Island, New York couple thinks it’s a smart move to trademark “Occupy Wall Street” and are planning on putting the logo on bumper stickers, umbrellas, hand bags, back packs, underwear and footwear.  We’re capitalizing just like other people around the country and globally with “We are the 99%” and “Occupy D.C.”  Filed under the name “Diane Maresca” the registration was abandoned in early November.  The month of November saw new trademark registrations using the words from  “Occupy” to “Occupy Hip Hop”  “Occupy Any Wear” “Occupy United” “Occupy Together” and “Everywhere I Occupy I Go.”  So what’s next?

Android App “I’m Getting Arrested”

This app was designed with protesters in mind.  Got handcuffed in Zuccotti?  Arrested during a demonstration in Times Square? Notifying everyone of your whereabouts quickly tap the app.

“Wall Street Jobs Disappear in the New Year”

15,000 finance jobs will disappear from Wall Street in the new “2012″ year.  Fear lingers in the minds of young people that are putting their nose to the grind trying to find a job for the first time.

“Feed the Greed”

“Feed the Greed” The Real World (MTV) “Occupy Wall Street” protesters can tell their stories by applying online.

“Occupiers March Protesting Banks in Ten Major U.S. Cities”

Occupiers are marching in ten major cities across the country.   In NYC OWS are protesting “Bank of America” home foreclosures, but these “attention-getters” have no real message.  Some are homeless, jobless and others wannabee hippies.  No one has stated their goal and stepped up to the plate.

“OWS Mark Sixth-Month Anniversary at Zuccotti”

Spring is in the air – Occupiers are here

On Saturday, March 17th celebrating a St. Pat’s Day Parade hundreds of people descended on Wall Street’s financial district which began with marching on lower Broadway and ended with 73 arrests made by police who setup barricades around Zuccotti Park due to protesters installing now-illegal tents and sleeping bags and other encampment equipment.   Many demonstrators sat down locking arms and chanting “we are not afraid” saying they were “pushed and shoved” while some said they were beaten.  Police denied beating anyone as they cleared the streets.  Protesters were loaded onto an MTA bus.  “Occupy Spring is Here” as filmmaker Michael Moore spoke at yesterday’s march telling reporters “This park is sacred ground for millions of people across the country.”

“Michael Moore Draws Hecklers”

Millionaire Michael Moore heckled by occupiers for being too rich  signed autographs during six-month rally at Zuccotti.

“Grabbing Bull by its Testicles”

It was a spectacle when OWS removed barriers grabbing bronze bull’s testicles.  We’ll show you what mighty greed feels like.  In spite of the yelling and screaming no protesters were arrested.

“April Fools Day Marks Six-Month Anniversary”

A rainy Sunday was “April Fool’s Day” but no one was joking as hundreds of 99% protesters held up “Health Care” signs marching across the Brooklyn Bridge celebrating six-month anniversary.  The first protest resulted in 700 people being arrested for blocking traffic.  This time it was peaceful and no one was arrested.

“LA to NYC marking “May Day” around the country”

No work – No school – No shopping – No banking!

Outside the USA, May 1st is “International Workers’ Day” in observance of speeches, rallies and demonstrations.  It originated in the U.S. labor movement.  Since 2006 American unions and immigrant rights activists have resurrected May 1st as a day of protest.  In the wake of Occupy Wall Street, a national movement for social justice will take to the streets giving their voice for democracy and equality.   It all began right after the Civil War when capitalism ran rampant across America.  Then came the “Glided Age” increasing wealth and growing political influence by corporate power brokers known as the “Robber Barons” (were businessmen John Jacob Astor (Fur, Real Estate) Andrew Carnegie (Steel) James Buchanan Duke (Tobacco) J.P. Morgan (Finance) John D. Rockefeller (Oil) Cornelius Vanderbilt (Water transportation and Railroads) industries generated great riches as the fortunate few grew, but at the expense of workers which many of them were immigrants working long hours under dangerous conditions with very little pay struggling through each day.  As the gap widened between the rich and the poor workers began to resist.  In the late 1800s there were strikes by thousands of railroad, factory and mine workers which shut down major industries demanding decent working conditions and actions for living wages.  By 1884 the Federation of Labor adopted that “eight hours shall constitute a legal day’s labor from and after May 1, 1886.”  Unions and radical groups orchestrated  strikes and large-scale demonstrations across the nation and globally establishing “May Day” as an international holiday continuing the struggle for an eight hour day, workers’ rights and social justice.

With hundreds  of OWS demonstrators marking “May Day” on first Tuesday around the country, protesters in NYC marched and rallied in lower Manhattan from Bryant Park to Union Square with signs, bullhorns and other paraphernalia objecting to Wall Street corporate greed, foreclosures and the war which has taken the lives of many soldiers.  While most protesters were peaceful, police arrested more than 50 people for disorderly conduct.

“The Wolves of Greed Street”

Created by Francke the Lyrical Yankee

© Copyright 2011 – 2012

(For all the news that’s fit to rhyme in satire time)

All Rights Reserved

Stay tuned for the latest ‘Greed Street” news.

“To Catch a Cheat”

Cheats and liars are about the same.  They have no shame, no brains and therefore quite lame.  You might be surprised to find some cheats in the “Hall of Fame” with their names engraved as top players in all sorts of sports.  Strange as it may seem these guys are out for one thing, to screw a dame.

The Unfaithful

Tony Parker NBA superstar has been cheating

Tony the chump gets dumped.  Eva and Tony were in “Seventh Heaven” when they got married in 2007.  They had a European wedding.  Eva the desperate housewife strived to keep her marriage alive with Tony a guy full of baloney.  Now Eva is weeping and has filed for divorce on November 17, 2010 when she found out Tony was cheating with his former teammate’s estranged wife, Erin Barry.  Tony Parker and Brent Barry were teammates playing for the great San Antonio Spurs between 2004-2008.  Since this extramarital affair has come to a bitter end, Eva no longer considers Erin her friend.  Tony counter-sues in Texas while Eva has the blues.  The latest news from Erin Barry is that she did not have an affair with Tony.  Eva and Tony are seen sitting down at Santa Monica’s famous restaurant “Shutters on the Beach” for chow and a pow-wow.  No one is surprised their divorce is finalized.  Eva says she is not bitter about divorcing Parker.  Does 36-year-old Eva have a new lover?  Penelope Cruz’ brother, Eduardo who’s ten years younger.  After dating for over a year, Eva and Eduardo have parted ways.

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Brett Favre’s alleged sexting fling

NFL Minnesota Vikings Brett Favre has finally admitted sex texting to former Jets reporter, Jenn Sterger.  Brett denies sending Jenn, the sideline “hostess with the mostest” his nude photos. There is an ongoing investigation, but the NFL was unable to make a connection with cell-phone photos.  Sterger’s manager has new information that connects the photos to Brett.  The 41-year-old quarterback lacks tact.  He should retire after a concussion, spraining his right shoulder and two ankle fractures.  Brett’s wife, Deanna who has survived breast cancer believes faith will get her and many other people through difficult struggles.  Although there was no sufficient evidence to prove allegations that Brett Favre sent nude lewd photos to Jenn Sterger’s phone, he was fined $50,000 for his failure to cooperate with the investigation. The 41-year-old quarterback who lacks tact has more allegations of sexual harassment as two former New York Jet masseuses strike back.  They’ve filed a lawsuit against Brett the so-called brute.  So far no one knows who is telling the truth.  Brett has decided it’s time to quit.  He’s finally retiring after his terrible injuries.  Now that a year has past rumors have it that Favre may be Michael Vick’s offense backup which he is familiar with.  Favre has rapport with Eagles coach Andy Reid and the quarterback has changed his mind many times.  Well it looks like the Philadelphia Eagles have signed Vince Young of the Titans to be on Vick’s dream team.

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Shame, Shame Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor

Former New York Giants linebacker and NFL Pro football Hall of Famer, Lawrence Taylor, may land in the can on sexual charges leading to a third-degree felony. Taylor posted $75,000 in bail which keeps him out of jail.  He’s been indicted by a Grand Jury on third-degree rape and criminal abuse of an underage runaway NYC prostitute.  On May 6, 2010 the police arrest Lawrence Taylor for allegedly paying a 16-year-old $300 when she was brought to his hotel room at the Holiday Inn, Suffern, New York by a pimp to screw.  New York City federal prosecutors charge Rasheed Davis, the pimp with allegedly assaulting and endangering the welfare of a teen.  The girl’s Uncle who lives in the Bronx called 911 to report her missing and that she had been text messaging.  Lawrence Taylor was in court on July 13th with his attorney, Arthur Aidala, a legal paid analyst for Fox News who entered a plea of “not guilty.” Taylor appeared on “Dancing with the Stars” last year.  His trial will be in 2011 where Taylor could face four years in prison.  At one time he was abusing alcohol and drugs.  On January 14, 2011 Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor plead guilty to a lesser charge and received 6 years probation for his improper sexual behavior with a prostitute, an underage Bronx runaway.  He is now registered as a “sex offender.” Taylor is set for an April 12th hearing at which time a judge will decide the level of his sex offender crime.  In the meantime the unnamed victim who  is now 17 and represented by Gloria Allred is suing him.  Judge ruled former Giants linebacker Lawrence Taylor is a low-risk level 1 sex offender.  It’s just a slap on the back.

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Steve McNair’s Deadly Love Affair

Now it’s time for the deadly love story of former national league football star, Steve McNair and his extramarital affair.  He was found dead in his bed lying next to the cold body of his 20-year-old girlfriend who must have been in great despair when she shot McNair twice in the chest and head.

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Bold Kobe!

Kobe Bean Bryant a professional NBA basketball superstar had a sexual-assault charge.  Bryant the guy labeled as “Mr. Clean” for his untarnished image denied allegations in June, 2003 that he attacked a teen employee at the Lodge & Spa Resort in Colorado, but did admit to sexual contact.  Charges were dropped as the victim declined to testify and an unspecified settlement was reached in a civil lawsuit. Kobe did not want to be scrutinized as a brute.  Some time later he apologized to the young woman, her family, friends and the citizens of Eagle, Colorado for his behavior.  In April 2011 Kobe at LA Laker game shouts out anti “gay slur” to the referee later apologizing for his actions and taking full responsibility.

In December, 2011 Kobe’s 29-year-old wife Vanessa went to divorce court claiming her husband was cheating.  There is no “prenup” which according to California law a wife can get half so Vanessa is entitled to Kobe’s money amounting to $75 million including three Newport Beach mansions.

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Many politicians play the same cheating game. Former  V.P. Al Gore of Tennessee, Former Gov. Eliot Spitzer of New York, Gov. Marshall Clement “Mark” Sanford of So. Carolina and former senator and presidential candidate John Edwards of No. Carolina went down the drain in political shame by ruining their good names.

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Al Gore’s alleged sexual encounter with a masseuse

In 2006 a complaint was reported to the Portland District Attorney’s Office against former VP Al Gore of Nashville, Tennessee by an unidentified 54-year-old masseuse.  At that time the Portland woman made up her mind not to proceed with a criminal investigation into her sexual encounter with Al Gore.  On January 8, 2009 Molly Hagerty, the therapist re-filed a complaint alleging Gore checked into the Lucia Hotel in Portland under the anonymous name of Mr. Stone, then made an appointment for a massage in his room and that’s when Gore sexually assaulted her.  In May, 2010 she considered suing Al Gore instead the masseuse decided to contact the National Enquirer to see if they would be willing to print her story for a whopping $1 million.  The masseuse claims she has DNA of the alleged sexual groping by Gore and has consulted with an attorney.  Gore has denied sexually assaulting the therapist.

On June 1st, Al Gore and his wife Tipper announced that after 40 years of marriage they’ve decided to split.  Authorities have carefully investigated the masseuse’s allegations and found no DNA on a pair of pants, including a non-credible witness who turns out to be a homeless person, plus the fact that she failed to pass a lie detector test, her story would not stand up in a court of law.  Two more masseuses have come forward claiming Gore’s inappropriate behavior.  In one incident he allegedly was naked and asked the massage therapist to take care of his peck.  The Gore’s spokeswoman said they are not upset over these latest allegations generated by tabloids for the stories are inaccurate and misleading.  The public thought Gore was as a bore, but now they’re wondering if he lured the masseuse.  After examining conflicting witness statements and insufficient evidence Portland, Oregon prosecutors have concluded that allegations filed in 2006 of sexual assault on a masseuse by Gore are dismissed.

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Client #9 – Rich Spitz “Sheriff of Wall Street” kicked out of politics

Former “Lovey Govey” Spitzer’s illicit affair with Ashley Dupre’ a one-night stand high-priced call-girl kicked him out of politics.  His wife and family decided to stick with “stiff-dick” Spitz.  There’s now an explosive documentary at the Tribeca Film Festival which depicts “Client #9: The Rise and Fall of Eliot Spitzer” his family, friends, the tales and woes of corporate foes and Spitzer’s connections with Cee Cee Suwal, a former madam who ran a prostitute ring while he was an elite member of the “Emperors Club VIP.”  Many NYC voters would like to see Eliot Spitzer run for Mayor in 2013.  Spitzer says he’s flattered, but it’s never going to happen.  He’ll just stick to his family’s real estate assets in Manhattan.  Money talks on October 4th, 2010 as Eliot Spitzer along with Kathleen Parker, a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist host their own CNN primetime news show.  Cee Cee Suwal spent six months in jail after she was linked to Spitzer and a prostitution ring.  Cee Cee meets the ladies of “The View” and admits that some prostitutes were paid up to $250,000 a week.  We now hear Kathleen Parker Washington Post Columnist  is leaving CNN.  It’s just a matter of when.  Parker and Spitz had a rift.  Man overpowers woman journalist.  Will this be a one-man talk show?  I don’t think so.  The new primetime name has been changed to “In the Arena.”  Spitz you got a pair of balls – I should say a “big wiener.”  Beautiful E.D. Hill from Fox News has replaced Kathleen Parker, an opinion writer.  Now spunky Erin Burnett vents her news sense on CNN’s 7pm “Out Front.”  From MSNBC “Countdown” for eight years to less than a year on Current TV this will be Keith Olbermann’s “second” firing.  He’s quickly replaced by none other than the rich Eliot Spitzer hosting “Viewpoint” his new gig.  Current TV founders are Al Gore and Joe Hyatt.  Now Keith Olbermann is suing Current TV demanding the remainder of $50 million he signed up for, but network does not want to pay because of Olbermann’s alleged multiple breaches of contract which they point out “Countdown” host said on David Letterman Late Show that his termination was “my fault” and that “I screwed up.”  Tough luck Olbermann!  Current TV countersues Olbermann so are we supposed to feel sorry for him?

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Sanford tried to be discreet – Turned out to be a cheat

Gov. Sanford’s wife, Jenny gets a new life.  She’s finally granted a divorce from her husband, Mark after 20 years of marriage because of his infidelity.  He admitted philandering with Maria Belen Chapur, an Argentinean beauty.  She was his “soul mate.” It was like Mark drove a stake straight through Jenny’s heart. Their marriage fell apart.  If you have the housewife blues, it’s time to read Jenny’s book “Staying True.” Don’t let that lousy spouse screw you.

It didn’t take long for Jenny to mend.  She found herself a new boyfriend.  He’s Clay Boardman an Augusta, Georgia businessman who’s also been through divorce court.

South Carolina lawmakers after thoroughly discussing the governor’s misconduct have reached the conclusion that Mark Sanford will not be impeached.  The governor pleaded not guilty, but agreed to pay $74,000 in fines when he broke the state ethics rules and traveled five days in June to Brazil for sex and thrills. Sanford also agreed to pay $36,498 penalty for an investigation into his itinerary that he used the state’s private aircraft, purchased expensive airline tickets and misappropriating campaign money. South Carolina is changing the rules so next time they don’t get screwed.  The disgraced Governor will not face criminal charges in the ethics case.

Is there a chance for Mark Sanford to rekindle his romance with Maria Belen Chapur, the Argentinean beauty now that he’s been through divorce proceedings?  The two were seen together in the Florida Keys.

Two-Term Republican Governor Mark Sanford is now a Fox News Political Commentator through “2012″ elections.

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John Edwards apologized for sex scandal and lies

Next in line is former senator and presidential candidate John Edwards who is trying to stay away from his ex-mistress and campaign videographer, 45-year-old Rielle Hunter aka Lisa Druck, who Edwards says he didn’t f**k.   She is asking for $17,910 a month in child support for her baby daughter, Frances Quinn Hunter which Edwards refuses to pay.  Looks like Edwards wants to get away from acknowledging that he’s the daddy of her sweet baby.

It comes as no surprise that Andrew Young, a former aide was Edward’s fall guy.  Young lied for Edwards and said he was the daddy of the Rielle Hunter’s baby.  In the meantime Hunter is planning to sue.  If Edwards only knew what he was getting into.  An ex-politician with no brains and no shame.  This cheating louse buys his ex-mistress a house.

John Edwards’ spouse Elizabeth who is suffering from Cancer wants to personally meet the 22-month-old baby, Frances Quinn Hunter, and is insisting that her husband ought to pay for child support.

Teary-eyed Elizabeth and her cheating spouse, John have signed a separation agreement after being married for 32 years.  John is sleeping with the other animals in his family’s barn.  Some anonymous sources claim that John might have harmed Elizabeth.  Edwards has gotten himself into an ugly mess.

John Edwards’ “dirty little secret” after taking a DNA paternity test has finally been exposed.   Now the whole world knows that he is the illegitimate daddy of his former mistress, Rielle Hunter’s nearly two-year-old baby.

It’s been revealed by a racy newspaper claiming that John Edwards asked Rielle Hunter to marry him after announcing he is the father of her baby.  More gossip is rolling in that John and Rielle are engaged which Edwards absolutely denies any validity to these stories.

From baby trouble to earthquake rubble John Edwards shows up on the island of Haiti.  Maybe Edwards wants the world to know that he’s human after all.

John Edwards’ ex-aide Andrew Young wrote a piercing sensational tell-it-all book “The Politician” an unflattering story of John and Elizabeth Edwards which should stun the nation. Edwards’ former staffer claimed to be the daddy of Rielle Hunter’s baby.

Young has a tape which he plans to reveal on the sexy details of John Edwards and Rielle Hunter’s shady love affair.  Andrew Young’s interview will be aired on ABC’s “20/20.”

John Edwards’ former mistress, Rielle Hunter is suing Andrew Young and his wife, Cheri for invasion of privacy over a video Young claims shows Edwards and Rielle Hunter in a sexual encounter.

Andrew Young said the only copy of this sex tape is locked up in an Atlanta safe deposit box.  North Carolina Superior Judge court orders Young to turn over the alleged sex tape which Mr. Young claims depicts a pregnant Rielle Hunter and John Edwards in the nude performing unprotected oral sex.

Judge Abraham Penn has sentenced Andrew Young and his wife, Cheri to 75 days in the pokey as the judge believes they have not told the truth about other copies of the sex tape while giving their sworn testimony.

Rielle Hunter “spills the beans” to GQ Magazine in an exclusive one-on-one interview.  She got the hots right on the spot for “Johnny” Reid Edwards when they first met in 2006 inside the lobby of the Regency in NYC.  Later that evening they went up to his hotel room and screwed.

Rielle reveals her stuffed “animal instinct” in racy photos for GQ the popular men’s magazine wearing a white shirt and surrounded by white sheets looking like “Mrs. Clean.”

Meanwhile John Edwards is being investigated by federal authorities under a grand jury indictment for using presidential campaign money to cover up the love affair he had with Rielle, his blonde honey.  Elizabeth Edwards maybe testifying against her estranged hubby.  Subpoenas have been issued.

Last by not least, Elizabeth is left with a broken heart.  Under North Carolina law a person has the right to sue a “third party” for the breakup of a marriage which Elizabeth Edwards intends to do and has threatened Andrew Young for contributing to her marriage that fell apart.

Elizabeth Edwards decided to get things off her chest by writing a book titled “Resilience” the painful story of a woman suffering from Cancer and a cheating husband who confessed to screwing Rielle Hunter, his mistress.

The National Enquirer is up for the Pulitzer Prize in Journalism since breaking the secret love story of John and Rielle forcing Edwards to admit that he is the daddy of Hunter’s baby.

Rielle Hunter sits down and chitchats with Oprah Winfrey  about her sexy encounter with Johnny.  Rielle says, “I’m no home wrecker.”  Oops!  I forgot to put on my panties posing in a photo shoot.  Of course Johnny thought I looked cute.

Two ex-aides of former Presidential candidate John Edwards took the stand and testified before a federal grand jury probing into alleged campaign payments made to Rielle Hunter, the hottie mistress and videographer.

Elizabeth Edwards’ health is failing.  Treatments for breast cancer are not helping.  Her three children Catharine, Emma Claire, Jack and husband, John were by her side hoping and praying she does not die.  On Tuesday, December 7, 2010 at the age of 61 Elizabeth passed away.  She was a brave lady.  Mary Elizabeth Anania Edwards died in her home at Chapel Hill, North Carolina (July 3, 1949 – Dec. 7, 2010) “A life to be remembered.”

No more than 3 weeks have passed since Elizabeth Edwards dropped dead that sleazy cheating 56-year-old John Edwards proposes to his mistress Rielle Hunter the blonde bombshell who he can’t wait to get into bed.  John John uses “no condoms.”

John Edwards is deposed in Chapel, N.C. regarding a civil suit filed by Rielle Hunter against Edwards’ former ex-aide Andrew Young in connection with an alleged “Edwards/Hunter” sex tape.

John who had a hard on for Rielle had the nerve to call her a moron for not disposing of the sex tape when he’s nothing but a “lying snake” and a disgrace.

The former senator and two-time presidential candidate awaits his fate for allegedly misusing campaign funds before a North Carolina Grand Jury over gravy money from supporters given to Edwards which took care of mistress, Rielle Hunter and their secret baby.  John Edwards might lose his law license and receive prison time for this crime if indicted.

On June 3rd, 2011 a North Carolina Federal Grand Jury has indicted John Edwards for illegally using nearly $1 million in political funds including conspiracy by giving hush money to former aide Andrew Young to cover up the secret love child with his mistress, Rielle Hunter.  Does it pay to have a good lay?

57-year-old John Edwards has rejected a plea deal which would have landed him in the pokey for six months with the possibility of losing his law license.  Since rejecting the plea Edwards is now facing 30 years in a federal prison.  Mug shot released of the political thief.  John Edwards’ trial is set for October.

It’s reckoning day for former “2008″ presidential candidate as Federal Election Commission rules Edwards was not allowed to keep campaign funds after he dropped out of the race.  He must repay $2.3 million to U.S. Treasury.  White House counsel who represented Edwards on his arraignment for allegedly misusing campaign finances leaves defense team while another prominent Washington attorney Abbey Lowell may be taking over.

Lawyers for Edwards filed motions to dismiss his alleged misuse of campaign contributions and other charges.

On Saturday, October 22nd, 2012 inside a Methodist Chapel Hill, North Carolina church John Edwards’ daughter Cate, a lawyer marries her college sweetheart Dr. Trevor Upham with a candle lighting ceremony at the altar in memory of her mother.  A reception for the charming couple was held at the family farm.  Cate dedicates time to the “Elizabeth Edwards Foundation” in lieu of her legal profession.

Former Democratic Senator John Edwards appears in Greensboro, N.C. courtroom on Wednesday, October 26, 2012 with his lawyers asking a federal judge to dismiss alleged charges of misusing campaign contributions on grounds that the government exceeds election powers.  Edwards still claims no wrongdoing, but did give $1 million to his mistress who at the time was carrying his baby while his wife was dying.

Federal Judge delays Edwards’ trial until January, 2012 as defense team says it needs more time to review thousands of documents and interview hundreds of witnesses.

Now John Edwards wants another delay stating he is not feeling well, but it seems he may want to marry Rielle.  Then she can’t testify at his trial.

Scheduled hearing  before Federal Judge on Friday, January 13th, 2012 reveals John Edwards needs urgent life-threatening heart surgery.

On Monday, January 30th, 2012 a North Carolina Judge postpones former Edwards’ aide, Andrew Young contempt hearing due to unassigned prosecutor.

John Edwards and Rielle Hunter’s sex tape to be destroyed after settlement reached.  What a relief for “Edwards the Cheat.”  Andrew Young, author of “The Politician” said he found the tape in the trash one day after Rielle moved out of their “lovey-dovey” secret hideaway.  Then Rielle sued Andrew.

On Thursday, March 15, 2012 Federal Judge allows John Edwards former two-time Democratic Presidential candidate to hire two lawyers who recently represented his mistress, Rielle Hunter for the upcoming April criminal trial.  Hunter would obviously be called to the witness stand giving her testimony that she and Edwards had an ongoing affair during his campaign for the presidency acknowledging cash payments and benefits covering from medical care to living expenses, furniture, clothing, luxury vacations and accommodations concealing her and their baby.  Edwards has plead “Not Guilty.”

Oops he did it again!  Former North Carolina Senator and once presidential Democratic candidate John Edwards’ name was first to pop up in little black book with NYC “Millionaire Madam (or) Soccer Mom Madam” which he emphatically denies any connection with one of Anna Gristina’s highly-priced hooker during “2007″ campaign stopover in NYC at the swanky Park Avenue Loew’s Regency.  This same hotel is where Edwards stayed, spent thousands and first met Rielle Hunter, the videographer when his wife, Elizabeth was dying from Cancer.  A week before Elizabeth’s death she left John out of her Will leaving  money and possessions to the children.  John got on his knees proposing to Rielle just three weeks after burying his wife, Elizabeth.  The two love birds are currently living and sharing a home in North Carolina where eventually they will all be one big happy family.

On Monday, March 26th recently filed motions will be discussed at the Federal Courthouse in Greensboro.   Prosecutors ask defense team not to bring up John Edwards’ health issues, possible sentencing if found guilty and contempt proceedings involving his mistress Rielle Hunter and Andrew Young former campaign aide sex tape case.

On Thursday, April 12th in Greensboro, North Carolina the long-awaited John Edwards’ trial jury selection begins.  Testimony began Monday, April 30th with former campaign staff member, Andrew Young taking the witness stand.  Young says he feared for his life and claimed paternity of Edwards’ child that the former democratic presidential candidate tried to hide.  David Harbach, a member of the prosecution team walked the jury through Mr. Young’s relationship with Edwards’ family and his connection to Ms. Rachel (nickname “Bunny”) Mellon, an elderly (101 years old) banking heiress outraged by criticism who contributed $725,000 said she would do anything to support John Edwards’ presidential campaign including his “expensive $400 haircuts” please send the bills to me in writing to Mr. Young.  The government will try to prove that John Edwards a two-time presidential hopeful very well knew that donor campaign funds from Ms. Mellon and another wealthy individual were “illegal” contributions.  “It’s not a federal crime to have an affair” said prosecutor.  Allison Van Laningham, a local defense counsel with a “southern accent” based her argument that the payment was a scam by Mr. Young and his wife, Cheri to use hundreds of thousands of dollars from Ms. Mellon to build a home in Chapel Hill not far from the Edwards’ family estate.  Besides these “pretty expensive haircuts” payments went to cover medical expenses of John Edwards’ mistress, Rielle Hunter who gave birth to their daughter in 2008 and to keep their relation a secret.  Mr. Edwards went along with this plan to avoid humiliation for himself and his wife, Elizabeth.   “It never crossed his mind that this campaign money would be in violation of the finance campaign law” counselor told the jury.  Mr. Edwards has suffered “the destruction of pride and the birth of humility.”  John Edwards is a man who committed many sins, but no crime.”  Listening to all the shameful details was Edwards’ eldest daughter, Cate Edwards Upham, who did leave the courtroom on one occasion crying, is a lawyer who was helping advise his defense team.  John Edwards’ parents Bobbie and Wallace were sitting beside her.  The trial is expected to last for at least six weeks.  Mr. Edwards who is now 58 years old faces a sentence of up to 30 years in a federal prison on all six counts and $1.5 million in fines if he’s convicted.  Defense presents “Motion to Dismiss” which judge rejects stating case will go to the jury.  Defense rests its case without calling to the witness stand John Edwards, his daughter and slutty mistress Rielle Hunter.

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Ashley Dupre’ call-girl to New York Post sex columnist to lingerie

Let’s see what former NY Gov. Spitzer’s side dish Ashley Dupre’ has to say. The “ex-call-girl” Eliot’s one-night-stand tells it all as a sex columnist for the New York Post, Ask Ashley, the “sexy host” with the most.  This rich bitch gives advice and tips on sexual relationships.  Do ex-whores get paid more?  Now Dupre’ opens a lingerie store from sexy bras to panties “Femme by Ashley” located at the Jersey Shore.

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The Rise and Fall of a Mighty Sexy Tiger

Tiger Woods tried to be discreet, but now his apologetic words are on the street.  Tiger has to face the public disgrace that he committed infidelity and cheated on his wife and family.  It’s difficult to hide once you’re a celebrity.  “What’s mine is mine and what’s his is mine.”  Tiger’s fate when he pulled down his drawers and scored.  “Bad Boy” has fling for “girlie things.”  Condoms maybe his biggest sponsor.

Tiger’s beautiful Swedish wife Elin Nordegren who previously was a nanny and teen swimsuit model, buys her own six-bedroom home on the faraway small island of Faglaro, called Faglaro farm in Sweden.  After Tiger’s infidelity why would Elin want to be in the same house with a cheating spouse?  Violating one’s trust can definitely harm anybody psychologically.

Elin is suffering from all the publicity and humility.  She’s been spotted not wearing her wedding ring. Is Elin leaving or staying? This beautiful young lady maybe filing papers in the State of California under their “no-fault divorce” law for an equal share of money and property.

The bookies set odds that Tiger and Elin will split with the prospects of a divorce settlement, plus what’s up with Tiger Woods’ future on the “green scene?”

There’s a string of rumors going around that Elin wants full custody of the children and half of everything. Split down the middle Elin would get $300 million.  A large pill for Tiger to swallow.  Meanwhile the word is out that Tiger refuses help for his sex and pill addiction.  His life maybe straight downhill.

From an underwear model to a nightclub cocktail waitress, high-priced call girls, a cougar, stripper and two “porn stars,” Tiger loved and adored “14″ alleged mistresses perhaps more.  The women say they are not whores. No one is really sure. They’re all coming out of the woodwork with their “kiss-and-tell” how they fell for Tiger the jerk.

Never judge a book by its cover, Tiger the mysterious lover. When all is said and done, Tiger’s father, Earl Woods was no different than his son.  Tiger’s Mom, Kultilda (Tida) had to deal with her husband’s infidelity.  Meanwhile Tiger sets sail on his $22 million dollar 155-foot yacht “Privacy” for a lonely holiday away from the family with a bunch of cronies.  Tiger needs time to analyze everything that’s happening. Some witnesses believe Tiger’s yacht is still docked.

Now we hear that Tiger got a court order to block his nude photos, but it maybe too late as Playgirl has come on the scene waiting to confirm the authenticity of these nude pics then they’ll be published in their magazine.  Were the alleged mistresses paid big bucks to keep their mouth shut?  How much did Tiger pay for each “f – – k?”

Some sponsors have stopped advertising as Tiger wants his privacy.  While Tiger lays low Proctor & Gamble’s Gillette officially phases out the pro’s razor shaves.  Other giant companies such as Nike, EA Sports and Upper Deck are losing money over Tiger’s infidelity, but so far they are sponsoring.

Pepsi’s Gatorade Tiger Focus drink, Kellogg’s and Accenture were the first to go.  They will no longer sponsor the golf pro. AT&T will not be sponsoring Tiger for its text messaging.  They’ve decided he’s not the right man for their cell phone service plans.

The clock stops as TAG Heuer the famous Swiss watchmaker drops Tiger from its U.S. advertising campaign.  In light of all the shame and drama Tiger receives “PGA Tour Player of the Year award” while the Associated Press names Tiger “Athlete of the Decade” discounting his escapades.

Since Tiger’s car crash and surmounting infidelities, GM has officially announced they will no longer be sponsoring the golf pro.

Well here’s some good news. TAG Heuer has changed its view and decides to stand behind their man.  Maybe the watch company believes like Nike that loyalty is the best policy.

An Orlando Corona cigar company is playing up to Tiger by offering $100,000 to sponsor the golf pro celebrity.  It’s great publicity for the company, but will this “smoke deal” appeal to the mighty sexy Tiger?

The Tiger brand for “golf’s first billion-dollar man.”  This Westchester County, NY company is racking up sales for its “Lucky Tiger” classic barbershop brand.

Here’s a sponsor with a big heart.  Electronic Arts is standing by their friend Tiger to the bitter end.  This #2 video game company is sticking like glue.

Tiger has screwed shareholders and sponsors out of billions of dollars. When Tiger stopped playing TV ratings dropped.

Tiger Woods’ infidelity could be turned into  a Hollywood movie starring actor, Cuba Gooding Jr. playing the role of a troubled golf pro and his sensational escapades of the alleged “14″ whores that he laid.

The sad news is that Tiger registered into a six-week program at this “no-frills” Pine Grove Behavioral Rehab Facility in Hattiesburg, Mississippi in December, 2009 for group therapy and treatment of sex addiction.

It’s fact not fiction that Tiger’s wife, Elin has been spotted wearing her engagement and wedding rings.  The blonde beauty has supposedly threatened to take their children to Sweden unless Tiger promised to stop cheating and enter a rehab facility.  Elin has been seen visiting Tiger and it’s believed the divorce is off.

Tiger has shocked us by going topless on the cover of Vanity Fair. Looks like this golf pro is raring to go.  Of course who would have guessed he already undressed to have sex with “14″ alleged mistresses.

Brit Hume, newscaster for Fox news, has stated that if Tiger put Christianity into his life it would definitely take away the sins of infidelity.  Tiger favors his mother’s religion Buddhism.  Maybe Tiger Woods should change his line of business. If he could only rap n da hood like Rapper Maino with his newest single go “Get “Em Tiger.”  Perhaps Woods has wised up to all the bad stuff.

Well here’s a new scam by a Colorado man who was arrested on federal charges for placing on store shelves smart “Pop Art” pictures of Tiger Woods and his wife onto Gatorade Tropical-Mango bottle labels which read “Unfaithful.”  What will some people think of next to make a fast buck?   Tiger was just looking for a damn good “f – – k.”

Who knew Tiger would be coming to the rescue of Haitian victims by donating $3 million to Wyclef Jean’s Foundation hoping to create a mobile facility in Haiti.  Maybe this will dampen Tiger’s escapades of infidelity.

There are rumors that Tiger is laying low somewhere in South Africa hiding from the media.  Shame shame to a guy with no brains.

It may not be a big deal, but here comes 20-year-old Rickie Fowler from Oklahoma who might steal the show from Tiger the golf pro.  This up and coming PGA Rookie is the newest thing on the putting green.  He’s very good and could be the next Tiger Woods.

When flowers bloom in the spring Tiger hopes to be returning to the putting green.  Tiger is not sure if he will be ready for the PGA tour.  Will he be faithful to the “U.S. Masters” in April?

President Obama in a recent interview stated that he believes Tiger can “turn over a new leaf” despite his infidelities.  I’m sure Tiger feels terrible and will try to put his life back on the right track.

On February 18, 2010, Tiger gives a 13-minute apology on national TV.  He says, “I’m deeply sorry for not only behaving selfishly but irresponsibly and will continue my in-patient therapy.” Tiger blames fortune and fame on his infidelities.  He tells a small audience, “I was never on performance-enhanced drugs.  My wife never hit me before or after the nasty car crash.”

Tiger apologizes to the fans and wants to save his marriage after the pain and agony he caused his wife and family.  His words were cold as he scolded the press.  Tiger told them he wants privacy when it comes to his family.  Why should Woods be different from any other celebrity that is pursued by the Paparazzi?

Tiger’s Mom (Tida) sits with the other attendees and appears to be uptight listening to her son apologizing.  She then gets up and throws her arms around him showing love and affection.  Kutilda (Tida) Woods told the press how proud she is of her son and that he can be a better person.  She feels he has been treated unfairly and wants everybody to know her son has a good heart and soul. Buddhism will help him.

Woods makes no mention or apology to the distress he caused his ex-mistresses, in particular his “11th” alleged mistress, which Gloria Allred defends, a 32-year-old former porn star named Veronica Siwik-Daniels, aka Joslyn James.  The sensational stripper who gave up the porn star business at Tiger’s request and went into hiding after the scandalous news.  Now James feels she’s been used.  James claims Tiger made her pregnant during their three-year love affair resulting in a miscarriage and an abortion.  James became very emotional and started to cry when Woods apologized.  After Woods’ apology he was seen with his wife, Elin at their villa in Windermere, Florida.

Will the public forgive and forget? Don’t fret for Tiger.  This golf pro is a sure bet.  Tiger knows he’s the best.

Cheating on a spouse is domestic abuse.  Tiger was a recluse, liar and a louse.  Elin might have kicked Tiger out of the house.

There’s still more sad news for a Tiger with the blues.  Tiger checked into The Meadows an Arizona rehab facility supposedly for the treatment of prescription medication not sex addiction. Woods took “Ambien” a sleeping pill as he was dismayed when his dad passed away.

The FBI is investigating ties between a Canadian doctor and Tiger with the possibility of performance-enhancing drugs.  Tiger says he was never a drug user.  The guy is definitely a loser.  It seems Tiger got lost in his scheming sex flings.

Well what do you know Tiger the seasoned golf pro shows up at his home in Orlando after spending one week in an Arizona rehab facility for family counseling. He’s back into his old routine of exercising and practicing on the putting green.  No one knows for sure when Tiger will be returning to the golf scene.

Steve Williams Tiger’s caddie for 11 years claims he knew nothing about Woods’ intimate sex flings.  Williams stands by his man. Tiger has a wonderful wife and family, but he’s certainly let them down due to his shortcomings.

Now here’s an Irish bookie “Paddy Power” that’s not very happy. Guess they thought Tiger would accept their five-year $75 million dollar sponsorship.  Can Tiger afford to be picky?

Tiger’s Mom, Tida is rooting for her son and believes Elin should do the same thing.  Tida forgave her husband, Earl Woods for his infidelities.  Elin and Tida may not totally agree, but one thing is for sure they both adore Tiger.  After all he does bring home the bread and butter.

Who knew Ari Fleischer, former press secretary to President Bush was into the sports communication business.  Ari Fleischer has been helping sports legends out of their rough situations. Tiger recently hired Ari to repair his scandalous image as he’s preparing a triumphant comeback to the putting green in Orlando on March 25th at the Bay Hill Club and Lodge, Arnold Palmer Golf Tournament.  There’s also the possibility that Tiger will come out swinging his irons in April for the U.S. Masters at the National Golf Club in Augusta, GA.

This just came in that for some reason Ari Fleischer has left the Tiger team.  Guess Tiger is ready to once again live his dream.

Now let’s get back to Tiger’s messy Thanksgiving nasty car crash. He was issued and fined $164 for careless driving when officers arrived on the scene.  So far an investigative report reveals some of the details.  An ambulance takes an unconscious and bloody 33-year-old Tiger Woods to the hospital right after he crashed his 2009 Cadillac SUV into a fire hydrant and neighbor’s tree in the wee hours of the morning.  His wife, Elin used a golf club to break the rear window and set him free.  Elin hands over to Florida Highway Patrol troopers a couple of bottles of pain medicine. Who knows if it was some type of sedative.  Elin tried to board the ambulance, but the paramedic crew did not allow her stating it was a “domestic violence” case. Florida Highway Patrol officer tried to get Tiger’s blood results to complete the investigation, but was told he would need a warrant for any relevant hospital information.  The file is still under lock and key for Tiger is a celebrity.

Here’s some upcoming entertaining news for the public to view. Tiger will be animated in Comedy Central’s opening episode of the “South Park” television show.  There’s a clip of Tiger at the podium making a public apology and stating how he could get away with anything.  Guess he’s referring to his sex flings.

Well it’s “tee time” for golf enthusiasts as Tiger has announced that he will be playing at the U.S. Masters in Augusta, GA beginning April 8th while continuing his in-patient therapy.

Will golf be the same popular game? Tiger’s fame may overshadow his shame.  Does Tiger have more stripes against him?  Can he win back the love and affection of Elin?

Lights, camera, action! Former porn star Joslyn James has her moment of fame.  It certainly doesn’t look good for Woods as James plastered over “100″ alleged rough sex text messages between her and Tiger with racy photos on the Internet.  Tiger’s wife, Elin is upset and has picked up and left.

Joslyn James wants the public to know that when Tiger allegedly ended their three-year love affair it was a devastating blow. People need to understand and not judge me for being with a married man.  I would have done things differently if Tiger hadn’t lied to me.  She will be posting on her website another round of more than 1,000 sex text messages.  James claims Tiger’s friends knew about their secret sex rendezvouses.

Joslyn James is not planning on attending the “Masters” tournament in Augusta.  At a news conference with her attorney, Gloria Allred, James says Tiger is dishonest, not truthful and she still deserves an apology.  The golf club is making arrangements for tight security.

Alleged #1 ex-mistress Rachel Uchitel, a former nightclub waitress says she was “f – – ked” by Tiger.  Woods wants the slut to shut up about their intimate relationship and has offered Rachel megabucks.  She’s reportedly agreed to no sharing of sex texts or femails with the public.

Tiger’s kindergarten teacher, Ms. Maureen Decker who has hired attorney Gloria Allred wants a public and private apology from Woods that he was a racist victim and she did nothing to defend him.  Tiger relates to an incident in Charles Barkley’s 2005 book, “Who’s Afraid of a Big Black Man” in which Woods states that on his first day at school as a 5-year-old he was attacked by sixth graders who tied him to a tree, sprayed the “n” word and threw rocks at me.

Reporters for the first time in months get five-minute interviews as Tiger finally comes clean saying he’s done some pretty bad things.  Tiger is hoping for a nice reception and a few claps when he returns to the Masters putting green.  It’s still a private matter between him and Elin.  He refused to discuss his ex-mistresses, but mentions his disgusting behavior.  I’m sure if my dad was still living, he would find everything that I did extremely disappointing. Woods says it’s hard to believe that was me.

On April 5th Tiger gives his first lengthy press interview at the Masters in Augusta, GA on how he messed up.  The world-famous golfer is looking forward to playing and competing.  Woods talks about “self-help.”  He feels bad missing his son’s birthday while in rehab.  No, Elin will not be on The Masters putting green.  Tiger has hired 90 private bodyguards just in case his ex-mistresses try to get on the scene shouting while he’s golfing.  It will be a threesome while Tiger competes with other golf superstars like Choi and Kuchar.

The mighty Tiger Woods expects loyalty from his close friends and employees, but doesn’t follow traditional family values.

How can Tiger be a role model?  He promoted himself as a down to earth family-man worth a billion bucks, then cheated on his wife and slept with other woman he wanted to f – – k.  Now Woods is hoping his fans will cheer and clap their hands.  What does this man stand for but a bunch of whores.  Will this be his legacy?

Tiger just made another hit with his “dick.” Allegedly he laid a 22-year-old next door neighbor.  Tiger’s got a “stiff dick for young chicks.”

Does this make you mad or sad?  There’s a new Nike ad featuring the voice of Tiger’s late dad.  Will sales spike for Nike?

Taunting banners meant for Woods fly high in the sky over Masters golf tournament.  Pissed ex-mistresses advertise “Did you mean Bootyism!” and “Sex Addict?  Yeah Right.  Sure.  Me too!”  These gals really got screwed.

Since Tiger lives on “Honor’s Way,” shouldn’t he have something nice to say then “You suck! Goddamnmit?”  He’s sure not making a hit with all his bullshit.  Tiger doesn’t want the whores anymore.  He’d rather stick to Buddhism than Bootyism?  Woods lost the U.S. Masters, but he still faces the disaster of  whores that want to score.

Here’s some more hot news from another whore.  Tiger’s alleged ex-mistress, Jaimee Grubbs, a former reality TV star was the first to prove that Tiger screwed up when he f  – – ked Jaimee.  Supposedly she sent scores of sexy text messages.  The police arrested Grubbs, but it wasn’t for drugs.  The 24-year-old LA cocktail waitress allegedly had been driving under an outstanding warrant for a suspended license when hauled off to jail.  Grubbs was released the next morning after posting a large sum of bail money.  Tiger’s alleged honey will be returning for a court hearing.

E! premiered the most interesting tidbits of Tiger Woods’ true life story and his rise to fame and glory.  It seems that when Tiger was in college his teammates called him “Urkel.”  Tiger felt it was racist and hurtful.

Woods next golf match will be at Quails Hollow Championship starting April 26th.

A rowdy drunken heckler pissed off at Tiger is tasered and arrested on the Players Championship golf course.

Shucks!  Tiger missed the fairways, putting greens and the cut.  Guess he had his mind on those sluts.

Elin has not been standing by her man as she ran away with the kids to Sweden.  Now Tiger has the chance to do some partying.

There’s now talk of a Cheating Celebrity Reality TV Show with Bombshell McGee Jesse’s alleged Nazi ex-mistress and Jamie Jungers Tiger’s alleged sexy ex-mistress.  The girls have both agreed to do it although they haven’t signed on the dotted line.

This should be on the book shelves the real Tiger story, his life in a new “tell-it-all” by Steve Helling journalist for People Magazine from 2002-2009 on Woods’ nasty car crash, rumors of partying and drinking to the alleged pursuits of sexcapades and cheating ways.  There’s a tiger on the prowl – meow!!

It’s official – Tiger quits The Players Championship after experiencing a bulging disc (dick).  Woods says he has a neck injury.  Probably a peck injury from those bitchy hoes.

Tiger Woods is back in the game and will be facing Phil Mickelson in Dublin, Ohio as the PGA Tour comes to the Jack Nicklaus Memorial Tournament.  It will be one of the biggest championship events.

Tiger’s rhythm shows a slight improvement at the Memorial, but he still lags behind Phil Mickelson.  Woods is off to the U.S. Open in two weeks at Pebble Beach.

For Tiger, it’s one disaster after another.  Now his swing coach, Hank Haney is quitting and Elin is heading to divorce court.  The wise Mrs. Tiger wants $750 million which supposedly adds up to every whore who was willing to give Tiger sex thrills.  Elin Nordegren is also asking for full custody of their two children, Sam and Charlie.  Was all this worth Tiger’s partying?

Woods had a rough weekend at Pebble Beach.  He lost the golf tournament when Northern Ireland’s Graeme McDowell shot  a 3-over 74 to win the U.S. Open.  NBC got a boost for the best peacock ratings.

Tiger and Elin have parted their separate ways after a bitter sweet divorce settlement was finalized in Panama City’s Bay County Circuit Court after trying to patch things up.  Tiger supposedly offered Elin $100 million to keep her mouth shut with a signed confidentiality clause plus the two children and child custody money.  Woods’ income has decreased to $600 million due this lost endorsements.  The two have nothing to weep about since Tiger keeps the  beautiful Jupiter, Florida Mansion and Elin gets the lsleworth home in Orlando.  Now that Nordegrin  is single she maybe returning permanently to Sweden.  Terms of the divorce were not revealed with the exception that Tiger and Elin will share parenting of their 3-year old daughter, Sam and 19-month-old son, Charlie.  The couple were married in October, 2004 on the island of Barbados.

In a news interview Tiger said he was sad and felt bad, but wanted to wish Elin the best of everything.  He has apologized for all his wrongdoings.  Elin remarked how she could never trust Tiger again for he was a serial cheater.

Tiger has been struggling while going through divorce proceedings.  He was not at all pleased with the way Ireland’s media interrogated him about his sex scandal and other personal questions so he canceled the Scotland trip to practice for the British Golf Championship.

Is Tiger trying to impress the ladies with his new goatee?  Sad Tiger can’t seem to get his act together at Ohio’s Bridgestone Invitational.

Woods has another bout with his fowl mouth.  He missed four putts and yells out “f – -k” at the British Open Championship. Tiger is having a rough season on the course ever since his divorce.  Now that he’s a single man Woods needs to play a good game at Barclays.  If he’s lucky to win its off to the Ryder Cup.

Now for some good stuff.  Trump dumps Tiger’s first ex-mistress, Rachel Uchitel from Celebrity Apprentice after hearing about her alcohol and pill addiction.  The porn star whore is now co-starring in Celebrity Rehab 4.  This 34-year-old sex addict decided to quit due to the stress she endured as Tiger’s mistress.  Producers have convinced Rachel to return to the show for after all fortune and fame is the name of the game.

Silence is golden as Rachel says she still loves Tiger who paid her $10 million.  He might have shut her trap, but she wants him back.  His ex-wife who went through hell got a lot more than the whore.  Elin Nordegren has decided to stay in the U.S. with her two children and not return to Sweden.

Looks like Tiger went from sad to glad as he’s purchased a  NYC lower Manhattan bachelor pad.  He’s taken out a $54 million dollar mortgage for his fashionable Jupiter mega mansion.

Elin’s big digs.  With her $100 million-dollar whopping divorce settlement she’s purchased 9,000 square feet of space for $12 million in North Palm Beach, Florida just ten miles away from Tiger’s Jupiter Island estate.

Tiger, the captain’s pick is off to the Ryder Cup from Oct. 1-3 at the Celtic Manor in Wales playing against 21-year-old newcomer Powerhouse Ricky Fowler.  He never won anything, but Tiger watch out for this guy’s perfect golf swing.  As there wasn’t enough room for everyone, the charter plane bumped a few players on the U.S. dream team including Tiger’s caddie.

Is Tiger in a rut?  He suffers his greatest loss at the Ryder Cup.  It was a soggy, wet and rainy course as an American leaves a putt short.  Putters try to keep up with the weather, but in the end the Europeans win through thick and thin.

Fans cheered Tiger Woods for the last five years.  Now the mighty Tiger is not in the #1 spot after England’s Lee Westwood claims victory.

Here’s another dame looking for fame. Devon’s sex affair with Tiger began in 2006.  The 29-year-old porn star Devon James claimed to have a baby boy with Tiger.  Her paternity lawsuit turned out to be a falsehood against Woods.  Devon arrested twice for prostitution in Florida is not acting alone on a Woods’ sex tape scam which involves her husband, Nick James and another man, Teneal Goyco who did not know he was taping for a commercial.  He dressed up as a Woods’ look alike in Nike clothing.  Goyco has hired an attorney.

Elin Nordegren has hitched up with a new boyfriend.  The two were seen kissing and hugging.  Woods had his chance until he pulled down his pants.  Tiger might be crushed, but it’s too late to make up.

It’s best after Tiger Woods’ mess to stop writing the lines for Conde Nast.  The Golf Digest publication calls it quits after their long-term sponsorship.

Woods hopes he scores at the 2011 European tour.  Martin Kaymer is the all time favorite with Woods barely trailing.  Tiger finally makes his best score.  The mighty Tiger roars!  All eyes are on Dubai as Woods vies for top prize.

Tiger falls short on the Dubai course.  Looks like he threw a fit on the 12th hole after missing a par putt when he spit.  The European tour fined him for bad behavior.  Tiger apologized for spitting on the green after losing.

Tiger Woods makes his first appearance on Jimmy Fallon “Late Night” show.  Jimmy makes fun and poke jokes at the golf pro.  Tiger took it in jest as Jimmy’s guest.

Woods has been trying to sell his 155 foot yacht “Privacy.”  Perhaps he needs the money.  Bought it back in 2004 for $20 million before his encounter with the whores.  The yacht was a wedding gift to ex-wife, Elin.  He tried offering it to her, but guess it was a pain in the neck to maintain.

Tiger dating blonde blue-eyed 23-year-old Northwood University student Alyse Lahti Johnson who looks like his ex-wife.  This chick digs rich dicks!

Tiger “f – – ked” up at the Players Championship as he couldn’t finish putting due to a left leg injury.  Woods who is trying to heal his ailing left leg is walking on crutches with a protective boot says it’s doubtful he’ll play in any game for Memorial Day.  Tiger admits he’s not fit for any tournament, but was hoping to go to the U.S. and British Open.  A cool northern Irishman Rory Mcilroy is the youngest winner of U.S. Open for the 83 years of golf history.  For Woods it had to be very disappointing.

Woods gives his caddie and longtime friend Steve Williams the “old heave ho.”  Sorry I had to let you go Steve, but it’s time for a change Tiger writes on his website.  Stevie not taking it lightly.  Caddie shows his mad side after 12-year relationship stating he lost respect after Tiger’s extramarital affairs, but stuck by him through thick and thin.  Stevie believes Tiger is blaming me for not winning.

The Mighty Tiger hopes to get his career back into high gear at the August 2011 Bridgestone Invitational in Ohio after injuries to left knee and Achilles’.

Tiger has the golf blues over losing at Bridgestone Invitational.  Woods had another bad day at PGA.  Apparently Tiger’s flings have interfered with his swing.  Maybe the pro is having a hard time getting out of those holes.

It’s wedding bells for Tiger’s ex-mistress Rachel Uchitel who got married to boyfriend, Matt Hahn in Clark County, Nevada.  Is Hahn’s shlong bigger than Tigers?

Has Rolex gone out on a limb endorsing Tiger?  It’s the golfer’s first official endorsement in two years since his sex scandals.

Irate fan arrested after throwing a hot dog at Tiger’s face.

Mad Steve Williams Tiger’s ex-caddy makes harsh racial “black asshole” remark.  Stevie tells Tiger he’s sorry.

Woods gets into the good stuff winning U.S. President’s Cup.  Cheers to Tiger as he wins his first golf tournament in two years.

Tiger’s ex-wife Elin tears down her $12 million North Palm Beach, Florida mansion due to termite infestation.

Phil Mickelson soars while Tiger paws and stumbles at Peeble Beach, California.

Go get ‘em Tiger!  Before Tiger’s golf deal, he wanted to be on Navy SEAL team.

Tiger drops out of Doral Tournament due to recurring Achilles left knee injury.

He’s out of the woods.  Tiger’s first winning streak in 30 months since losing “PGA” tour in 2009 claims victory on Saturday, March 24th in Orlando, Florida at Arnold Palmer Invitational.

Tiger throws” temper tantrum” kicking his club in a rage as winning the Masters fades.  He may be fined by the PGA even though Tiger apologized.

37-year-old Rachel Uchitel Tiger’s ex-mistress who got married to one-time NYC nightclub manager, hunky Matt Hahn expecting her first baby shows pregnant belly with Twit Pics.  On May 15, 2012 the proud parents welcome baby girl, Wyatt Lilly weighing 7 lbs, 10 oz.

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Shame Shame Jesse James

Jesse James, designer of custom-made bikes, cars and a Reality TV star took his wife, Sandra Bullock for the worst ride of her life. Sandy, always protect your blind side something you should have learned from the movie.

This Nazi hottie tattoo model and stripper-dominatrix Michelle McGee allegedly had an 11-month affair with Jesse.  While Sandy was filming “The Blind Side,” Jesse took Michelle for a hump ride. She thought he was separated from Sandy.  McGee has issued a sincere apology to Sandy via Australian TV.

Apparently Michelle hasn’t seen Jesse since the news of their love affair. Michelle claims James was “Mr. Nice Guy.” As far as Sandy is concerned he cheated and lied.

Jesse has apologized, but Sandy has made up her mind.  She’s packed her things and is determined to never go back to Jesse. Sandy is looking for a celebrity divorce attorney and possibility custody rights to Jesse’s daughter, Sunny.

Shame on Jesse James for philandering around the town.  It’s no secret that he cheated.  Stop by and ask the employees at his Long Beach motorcycle shop.  Jesse allegedly slept with 11 other women since 2005 when he married Sandy and one of his lady friends had a baby.

James posted ads over the Internet looking for sex.  Jesse had a “stiff dick for biker chicks” with tattoos and big boobs.  James claims he’s a distant relative of the most notorious outlaw of the 19th century the bank, train robber and murderer from Missouri, Jesse Woodson James who roamed the western plains.

Jesse was married for a few years to a porn star before getting hitched to Sandy.  James was recently awarded custody of his 6-year-old daughter, Sunny and Sandy stood by him through thick and thin.

Now there’s another mistress that just popped out of the closet. It’s Melissa Smith and she wasn’t invited to his biker shop for tea and biscuits. Smith and James allegedly had a wild two-year relationship.

Here’s some more shit how Jesse tried to make a hit with hottie Los Angeles photographer Brigitte Daguerre, his third mistress. He hired cute Brigitte to do a photo shoot.  It seems Jesse sent Brigitte a lot of spicy sexy texts.  The messages are up for sale if the price is right.  Brigitte did not find Jesse sexy.

Now Brigitte is stating that Jesse never wore his wedding ring. Does Brigitte mean when they were screwing?  The alleged #3 mistress has deep regrets over her sexual behavior with Jesse, but has no intention on making any money even though Brigitte had a few offers to sell her story.  She regrets the entire mess. Brigitte says that most of the stories are untrue.  Poor, poor Brigitte must have the blues.  Jesse never gave her anything, a home or money.

Jesse allegedly is worth $100 million and so is Sandy. Jesse doesn’t really need Sandy’s money.  James claims he’s going to wise up like Tiger and has entered a 45-day rehab facility for his sexual desires. Sandy has no intentions on saving their marriage so Jesse has left the rehab facility.  Of course James claims it was because of privacy and security.

There has been a lot of gossip that Sandy and Jesse made a Nazi sexy tape filled with profanity.  No way says Sandy.

Since all this publicity Jesse has been stalked by a celebrity photographer.  Jesse fought back and might have to go to court.

Jesse’s three children have been living with Sandy in seclusion away from the limelight and paparazzi.

The comedian George Lopez has been seen visiting Sandy at her Hollywood Hills home ever since Jesse’s hanky-panky.  George and Sandy are “palsy-walsy.” Sandy helped George get his first big break.  Lopez thinks Sandy is just great.

It’s the first time in over a month that Sandy has been seen out in public taking a hike without her hubby, Jesse on his motor bike.  Just enjoying the fresh air and scenery.  She wasn’t wearing her beautiful French platinum wedding ring.  Neither was Jesse wearing his ring when spotted at the rehab facility.

Melissa Smith, Jesse James’ alleged mistress, his #2 screw, sent an apologetic fax to Sandy taking full responsibility for her sexual activity with Jesse.

Sandy has filed papers for divorce proceedings.  She’s experiencing the Jesse blues, but here’s the good news.  Several months ago Sandy and Jesse adopted a cute sweet African American baby, 3 1/2 month old boy named Louis Bardo who Sandy says will bring her lots of joy.  They gave the little boy a bris even though he’s not Jewish.  Neither is Sandra Bullock who apparently is a born-again Christian.

The word is out that Sandy and Jesse are selling their two-story 3,500-square-foot Southern California beach-front house.  It’s on the market as a private listing for around $6 million.  Interested parties will need to pre-qualify.  Sandy and her newly-adopted baby boy are living in a 1860s New Orleans mansion in the rich Garden District.

Jesse says he’s distraught – Wanted to get caught.  He was leading a double life, was not true to his children and wants to be forgiven for cheating on his wife.  Jesse will be appearing on national TV looking for sympathy.

Sandy gives her opinion of Elin Nordegren.  I’d get the baseball bat and keep hitting the dirty rat.

Sandra Bullock stuns everyone all decked out in a tight sexy black leather dress.  She receives a standing ovation and lots of cheers making her first public appearance at the Spike TV’s “Guys Choice” awards since splitting up with Jesse and adopting  a baby.  The Oscar winning actress was there to accept the “Troopers Choice” Award for entertainer of the year from members of the military.

Sandy picks up another trophy at the MTV Movie Awards ending the evening by grabbing 25-year-old actress Scarlett Johansson and starts smooching.  The two actresses discussed the idea with producers.

Jesse James fights with ex-wife, Janine Lindemulder who was planning to see their daughter, Sunny before Father’s Day.  No way says Jesse since the court ruled that a monitor be present he will not give Sunny to Janine today.

Sandy is now the happy divorcee while Jesse’s life has been turned upside down since the judge has ruled he will have to share Sunny with his ex-wife.

This time Jesse is not the brute in a civil lawsuit filed against him by a clothing company.  Jesse was smart to cut a deal with Walmart.  In the end he had to pay the clothing company, but the jury awarded him $6 million.

Lately Sandy has been fighting a crazy stalker and got a restraining order. Sandy wants to spend time with her stepchildren and family.  She has donated millions to charities like Hurricane Katrina, Haiti and Tsunami victims.

Jesse is once again on the scene dating TLC’s “L.A. Ink” tattoo artist and star, Kat Von D.  This Kat doesn’t scratch.  As a matter of fact Jesse is now engaged to Kat Von D.

His old flame Bombshell Michelle says Jess is just an “Average Joe” when it comes to sex.

It should be no surprise that Jesse and Sandy have moved on with their lives.  Jesse has settled in Austin, Texas and so has Sandy as she wants to be closely involved with his kids.  The decision was made long before Jesse was cheating.

Sandy and actor, Ryan Reynolds are seen partying on New Year’s Eve.  Forget the gossiping they were just dancing.  The two have been good friends and have no intentions on dating.

Jesse is preparing his memoir titled “American Outlaw” to be published by Simon and Schuster.  James who is the father of three children and has been married three times gives intimate details in a tell-it-all book covering his life, marriage and divorce to the famous Sandra Bullock.  He also reveals his recent engagement  to “L.A. Ink Star” Kat Von D. a Latino born in Monterrey, Mexico.

Sandy gives $1 million to Japan’s victims suffering from a horrific earthquake, tsunami and nuclear disaster.

Shame on you Jesse “pain in the ass” James for admitting publicly that Kat Von D outperforms sexually in bed than Sandy.  The happy couple split right on Sandy’s July birthday.  Kat gets screwed over tattoo under her arm of Jesse as a young boy that can’t be removed.  Forever linked to indelible ink.  Latest news is that Jesse and Kat Von D are as happy as can be.  The two lovers moved back in with each other.

Jesse James’ dame Kat Von D is more than a tattoo queen.  She’s now singing and having fun in the recording studio doing her first “tragic and romantic” album.

On November 15th 2011 Kat Von D tells Facebook friends about ending her bullshit relationship with Jesse James over cheating this past year with 19 women.  Kat scratches “sick prick” off her list.

Jesse’s latest hard-on is four episodes of “Outlaw Garage” custom bikes and cars.  Can’t wait to see Jesse’s sweaty white tees.

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Ashton Kutcher – Hunky Alleged Cheater

Ashton Kutcher 32 angry at Star Magazine’s story claiming he was cheating on his 48-year-old wife, Demi Moore.  Is the alleged other woman a whore?  Her name is Brittney Jones, a 21-year-old who is probably looking for fortune and fame.  She told the magazine it was not some sex fling.  Ashton Kutcher is a great lover.  Ouch!  Instead of the bedroom they had sex in his house on the couch.  While Demi was out of town they were fooling around.  Kutcher is threatening the magazine with slandering.  Demi and Ashton are celebrating their fifth anniversary denying rumors of Ashton’s infidelity.  Looks like the two want to prove they are happily married as they are shown in a bed scene cuddling.  The couple were also seen hugging on the set of “The Reasonable Bunch” Demi’s new movie.  Meanwhile Moore has settled her lawsuit against Pacific an Australian magazine over copyright picture issues.

There’s more rumors going around that Ashton and Demi split on their sixth anniversary after the star of “Two and a Half Men” allegedly got naked and took a dip with busty blonde hottie Sarah Leal, a Texas girl after he dicked her in his bedroom at the Hard Rock Hotel in San Diego.  Meanwhile Ashton and Demi were scene wearing their wedding rings.  Ashton complains about mad Social Media while Demi is angry about Paparazzi.

Less is better than Moore.  November 17, 2011 was a sad day for parting ways, but Ashton and Demi have decided their six-year marriage is not working and are heading to divorce court.  Ashton couldn’t control flexing his pecker.  All he wanted was sex with young girls.  Demi was too old for Ashton’s world.  One time around for 33-year-old Ashton, but three times for 49-year-old Demi.  What more can we say except to wish them happier days.

Sadly Demi couldn’t take it any moore ever since Ashton cheated on her.  She wound up in the hospital after allegedly swallowing harmful drugs and may be heading to a rehab facility.  Rumer has it that Demi who is under emotional stress is now receiving “at-home spiritual counseling” while her children stay with their daddy, Bruce Willis.  Ashton was spotted heading up Demi’s driveway for some friendly visiting.

Devastated that she lost her role in the adult film “Linda Lovelace” portraying feminist activist Gloria Steinem it went to actress Sarah Jessica Parker.

Demi has become a “skinny winnie” in her pursuit to stay younger.  She looked for companionship after splitting up with 33-year-old Ashton hooking up with 24-year-old actor Zac Efron.  They went to a LA Venice Beach house party.  Soon after arriving home a friend called “911″ that Demi was semi-conscious and convulsing.

The latest news is that Demi has decided to enter the plush “Cirque Lodge Alcohol and Drug Rehab Center” in Sundance, Utah to cure her.  The “Margin Call” star realized that working was not the remedy.

Demi recently completed rehab and flew out of the country.  She was spotted on the beach in a private villa with tight security near Parrot Cay in the Turks and Caicos Islands located about 550 miles from Miami.  There’s no way Demi is gonna get groped as only access to island is by boat.

“Cougar” Demi

Her ex-hubby Brucie owns a home in Parrot Cay so maybe that’s where Demi is staying and shacking up with somebody.

Even though Ashton is no longer Demi’s hubby, he’s still supporting as a father figure her 23-year-old daughter Rumer.  She’s an aspiring singer performing at the Sayers Club in LA where Kutcher joined Rumer’s table and was happy to see him for her big night under the spotlights.

Ashton Kutcher has been seeing sexy singer Rihanna since December.  Two turtle doves “We Found Love.”  It has to be devastating for Demi.

Demi steppin’ out of post-treatment lookin’ like a “spring chicken.”  Can’t blame Demi for wanting to change her “Twitter” name after all that Kutcher shame.

On Thursday, May 3rd, Moore tweets no longer@Mrs. Kutcher to Twitter me@JustDemi.

Kutcher an “Indian Taker” is now a flaky “Popchips” dip.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger – The Faker

Arnold tried to cover up 20 years of lies, but Patty Baena his assistant and housekeeper that bore his love child threatened to expose Arnold who would have to admit he cheated on Maria.   When Maria Shriver knew that Arnold screwed their merry maid, she threw her cheating louse out of the house.  Will his wife and family forgive the pig?  Does Arnold Schwarzenegger intend to continue paying for his illegitimate son?  When all is said and done Schwarzenegger’s new acting role could be a groovy screwin’ movie?  They say it’s animated about the maid he laid.

There’s more sensational allegations that Schwarzenegger took taxpayers’ money for wild sexual parties.

This smart ass “Wise Guy” – Schwarzenegger’s “True Lies.”   Mildred Patricia Baena’s ex-husband Rogelio Baena, a Columbian native whose name appears on the birth certificate plans to sue Naughty Arnold and Mildred Patricia (Patty) Baena as they engaged in conspiracy falsifying a public document, a serious criminal act under California law.

The “merry maid” gives public interview how she got screwed.

Maria Shriver heading to divorce court.  She wants spousal support after cocky Arnold admitted to an affair out-of-wedlock.  Maria hired Laura Wasser a top LA lawyer.  The two are seeking joint custody of their minor children.  Former California Governor’s fortune is estimated to be between $500-$700 million.  There’s no prenup agreement, but Arnold is willing to give Maria more than she’s asking for.  Arnie will pay Maria spousal support and legal fees.

Maria buys $10 million mansion right down the street from Arnold the cheat.

It seems Maria is not seeking divorce proceedings because of religious reasons.  She’s been seen furniture shopping with Arnie.

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Anthony “Cheater” Weiner Dilemma

Why do some politicians lie?  Do they feel they’re above the law?  Now that everybody saw lewd photos of New York congressman’s weiner, he finally admits it’s his “p – – -k” after sending Facebook and Twitter pics of himself and “dick” bare chested in jockey boxers.  Will his wife, Huma Abedin and the public forgive him for his sins?  They say a “p- – -k” has no conscience.  Democrats send Weiner to the cleaners.  Wife says she still loves her “kosher” weiner on a honey bun.  Congressman Anthony Weiner a “sick p – – – k” needs the help of a psychiatrist.

After pressure from Republican and Democrat house members Weiner finally resigns.  The congressman is more fortunate than the rest of us as he will be receiving a pension worth a whopping $1.3 million exit payment for serving 12 years that’s covered by the Federal Employee Retirement System.

Weiner offered job with Spitzer “In the Arena.”  Client #9 gets fired so Weiner gets a “blow job.”

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Chris Hansen: To Catch a Predator – To Catch a Cheater

The 51-year-old married NBC Anchor man allegedly carried on an affair for several months with 30-year-old blonde bombshell Kristyn Caddell, a Florida journalist and television reporter.  The charming couple were caught on video camera by National Inquirer spending the night at Cadell’s Palm Beach apartment.  Handsome Hansen who lives in Connecticut with his wife and children has been seen at some ritzy Florida hotels dining and wining Cadell.

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To cheat and lie is against all rules.  Fools drown when they become the public clown.  You’re caught in a nasty trap and wind up dead or the stupid sap.  The price for a piece of tail could land you in jail. The public’s view is important to you.

It’s always wise to apologize.  Stand up to the bitter disgrace and admit your wrongdoing because sooner or later the other party may sue you.  Are court proceedings worth your family’s shame and pain?  In a civil lawsuit the dame has to reveal her name.  She obviously will receive media fame.

If a woman cheats she’s a sneak, but when a man cheats he’s a “low-down” creep.  Beware of that extramarital affair.  You may never repair your marriage from the damage and despair.  The biggest fear is your good reputation and the end to a wonderful career.  Think twice before getting into bed with that brunette, blonde or redhead.

© Copyright 2011 – 2012

Created by (Francke) the Lyrical Yankee

aka The Jester from Westchester (Satire)

All Rights Reserved

Cheats try to be discreet, but in the end it never works for these jerks!  Someone always gets hurt.  God I know not what I do – Only that I’m a fool.

JOBLESS WORLD

It all started when Eve took a bite out of Adam’s apple and she conceived.  Life grew from that apple on a tree and so did technology.

Disney’s Chairman of the Board their genius mastermind behind Pixar animation “Toy Story” “Monsters, Inc.” and a great visionary leader, innovator, marketer of technology, expanding communicating with Apple itunes online music store, Steve Jobs built an empire who inspired us is no longer living.

Steven Paul Jobs was an adopted child and college dropout which some people might believe this guy will never amount to anything, but Steve knew everything about computer technology and became this generation’s greatest creative inventor.

In 1974 Steve Jobs was first employed by Atari, Inc. the famous video game name.  Steve rose to fame as the designer of “Breakout” Atari’s successful arcade game.  Stephen Wozniak worked on the circuit board and was paid a small fee for helping Steve with Atari.

In the early 1970s Steve Jobs and his pal, Stephen Gary “Woz” Wozniak a Polish American computer engineer and programmer worked hard to build and sell personal computers out of Steve’s garage.

On April 1, 1976 Steve Jobs went on to become CEO and co-founder of Apple Inc. and Stephen Wozniak the other co-founder.  This was the start of Apple revolutionizing the computer industry.  Steven Paul Jobs was only thirty when he became a debonair multimillionaire.  His employees say he was not only enthusiastic, but a workaholic.

He later had a liver transplant and thought it was best to overcome the rare pancreatic Cancer disease by trying acupuncture, a vegan diet and herbal remedies before having surgery.  Steve Jobs learned that failure brought success, but Jobs was blessed.

From Apple Computers to Macintosh or Mac desktops to laptops Steve Jobs changed the computer industry into the electronic industry with imac, ipod, iphones, ipads and upcoming Apple itv a unique sleek style of technology this world has ever seen.  “App” became part of the Apple Store name.  The products we love have cool colors with application tools easily accessible, useful and reliable.

Jobs pleased the consumer for he knew what they needed.  Steve Jobs you improved the way we see technology.  God bless you Steve for your legacy will live through infinity.

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Steven Paul Jobs:  Born San Francisco, California USA/Died:Age 56 at his home in Palo Alto, California just six weeks after retiring his position as CEO of Apple.  Death due to respiratory arrest and pancreatic tumor that spread to other organs.

(Feb. 24, 1955 – Oct. 5, 2011) Steve’s biological parents: Mother, Joanne Carole Schieble of American and German descent and Father, Abdul Fattah “John” (took this nickname) Jandali who emigrated to the United States in the 1950s from a very wealthy family in Syria to pursue university studies.  The two met at the University of Wisconsin in Madison when Jandali was teaching classes and Schieble a student.  They had a boy out of wedlock and wanted to get married.  Schieble’s father was against it, but when he died they got married and moved to Syria.  Carole Schieble Jandali was unhappy in that environment.  She decides to divorce Jandali and flies back stateside.  Ironically the couple keeps sister Mona, but puts Steve (unnamed at that time) up for adoption.  In the 1950s people shunned “out of wedlock” and families hid from the relatives what they did.  Carole Schieble Simpson who divorced Jandali in 1962 says she made an agreement with Paul and Clara Jobs that they would send Steve to college.  Paul is a machinist and his wife Clara an accountant.  Steve Jobs has never had any communication with his bio9logical father or mother.  Jandali now 80 years old runs a casino in Nevada has tried to communicate via emails with no response from Steve.  79-year-old Joanne Carole Schieble Simpson is in a Los Angeles nursing home with advanced dementia has no idea that Steve is deceased.

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Disowned but never robbed of his childhood – Adopted as an infant by Paul and Clara Jobs living in Mountain View, California gave Steve love and stability.

Survived by his wife, Laurene Powell Jobs and 3 children (one son and two daughters)  Steve had another child from a relationship. His sister is an American novelist Mona E. Simpson.  Steve Jobs’ mother remarries: Joanne Carole Schieble Simpson is a speech therapist.

Private funeral services held on Friday, October 7th, 2011 for family members.

Apple holding private memorial services on Sunday, October 16, 2011 at Stanford University.

October 16, 2011: On Sunday Gov. Jerry Brown of California commemorates “Steve Jobs Day.”

Apple Stores closing globally for one hour on Wednesday, October 19, 2011 honoring icon Steve Jobs.  The employees at Apple’s corporate headquarters in Cupertino, CA will watch live webcast of memorial service for Steve.

October 7, 2011: SONY acquiring the rights to new Steve Jobs’ biography for major movie.

October 24, 2011: Book publishers Simon & Schuster debut of Walter Isaacson’s Steve Jobs’ biography as the year’s #1 best seller.

November 14, 2011: Singer Sting launches free “Sting 25″ ipad App as a digital documentary of a 25-year solo career was introduced at Apple’s NYC Store along with his song “Fragile” is the singer’s dedication to Apple’s co-founder and visionary icon Steve Jobs.

Hollywood may be calling George Clooney to be starring as Steve Jobs’ in an upcoming movie.

November 15, 2011:  Apple names Arthur D. Levinson as their new chairman.

December 9, 2011: Apple opens store in Grand Central Terminal.

December 17, 2011: Steve Jobs “Billion-Dollar Hippie” BBC documentary.

January 24, 2012: Steve Jobs’ widow is a guest at President Obama’s “State of the Union Address.”

January 24, 2012: Apple now the world’s most valuable company worth $338 billion surpasses Exxon Mobil Oil by one billion.

February 9, 2012: Peaceful protesters deliver petitions with 250,000 signatures to Apple Store in Grand Central Station protesting working conditions and manufacturing in Chinese factories.

February 9, 2012: The following became public record due to Information Act.  Starting in 1985 information was gathered by the FBI after Apple received a bomb threat and Pres. George H.W. Bush expressed interest in giving the revolutionary corporate leader a presidential appointment on “Export Council.”  Documents revealed that Steve Jobs was indeed a “Hippie.”  One person interviewed shared some info that Mr. Jobs may have experienced “illegal drugs” including marijuana and LSD when they were in college during the 60s and 70s.

February 13, 2012: Apple the gadget-maker hits $500/share making it the most valuable company in U.S. history.

March 9, 2012: A group of Silicon Valley inventors and tech head honchos are banding together supporting education.  Steve Jobs’ widow Laurene Powell Jobs is trying to pass “The Dream Act” a legislation which essentially help undocumented students go to college, get jobs, and eventually be legalized.  The group’s work benefits “Educators for Fair Consideration” providing scholarships and internships with an operating budget of $600,000.  They are hoping immigration reform is going to happen.

March 9, 2012: DOJ investigating ipad over ebook price fixing.  Apple denied company’s part in recent claims of ebook price fixing that was said to suppress dominant Amazon Kindle.

March 16, 2012: Neophiles grab ipad’s latest technology.  Three million new ipads sold in 3 days.

April 1, 2012:  34-year-old hunky actor, Ashton Kutcher star of “Two in a Half Men” with over 10 million Twitter followers who also invests and heads up tech companies goes to the big screen in an Indie biopic portraying the late Steve Jobs titled “Jobs” the hippie to Apple co-founder.

April 5, 2012:  Apple’s CEO Tim Cook will settle “Google Android” dispute.

April 20, 2012:  Apple’s worth is now $600 billion falls short of Microsoft’s highest valuation on December 30, 1999 at $616 billion which tech company is now worth $260 billion.

April 11,2012: DOJ suing Apple over alleged e-book price fixing.

May 14, 2012: “Two and a Half Men” star Ashton “bearded” Kutcher photographed on set of “Jobs” biopic dressed as the late billionaire Apple innovator.  TV movie on life of Apple co-founder will be filmed in Jobs’ original garage that would one day become the world’s most valuable tech company.

May 16, 2012: “The Social Network” Academy Award-winning screenwriter Aaron Sorkin accepts Sony Entertainment offer to adapt Walter Isaacson’s “Steve Jobs” biography for a movie.

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APPS = JOBS

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© Copyright 2011 – 2012

Created by Francke the Lyrical Yankee

(Tribute to the late hard-working Steve Jobs.  Young at Heart – Stubborn and Smart) “To the Crazy Ones Who Think Differently”

“Stay Hungry” – “Stay Foolish”

This generation will never see anyone quite like Steve for his ingenuity and creativity.  May he rest in peace for eternity.

All Rights Reserved

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